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Shit straight guys do NOT say:

"Finally, a moisturizer I can live with!"

"I love that color."

"I've had enough to eat today."

I caught myself saying to a contractor just yesterday when he said he would be the one doing the maintenance on one of the new things, "Oh good. We'll be able to see you more often"

by Anonymousreply 356June 18, 2020 2:29 AM

Things straight guys don't say:

Oh, good, we'll be able to suck your dick tomorrow.

by Anonymousreply 1April 19, 2015 6:40 AM

MARY!!

by Anonymousreply 2April 19, 2015 6:50 AM

Where are my white pants at?

by Anonymousreply 3April 19, 2015 8:17 AM

"I just LOVED the taste of your asshole last night!!"

by Anonymousreply 4April 19, 2015 9:44 AM

Ugh, who decorated this place?

by Anonymousreply 5April 19, 2015 9:47 AM

I need a few more throw pillows here and there.

by Anonymousreply 6April 19, 2015 9:51 AM

"Carrie was a FOOL to marry Big!"

by Anonymousreply 7April 19, 2015 9:54 AM

Your ass is so fucking amazing. Can I eat it before I fuck it?

by Anonymousreply 8April 19, 2015 9:57 AM

"We need to talk."

by Anonymousreply 9April 19, 2015 9:58 AM

I just love the new hair!

by Anonymousreply 10April 19, 2015 9:58 AM

Let's compare dick size.

by Anonymousreply 11April 19, 2015 9:59 AM

I'll have an Apple-tini.

by Anonymousreply 12April 19, 2015 10:05 AM

That Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 movie looks just awful.

by Anonymousreply 13April 19, 2015 10:29 AM

"I'm worried SICK about Madonna."

by Anonymousreply 14April 19, 2015 10:36 AM

I gotta get my ass outatown!

Things are CRAZED right now!

This city has gotten so dirty!

by Anonymousreply 15April 19, 2015 10:59 AM

I wish they'd bring Camille back. I love her!

I HATE that color.

by Anonymousreply 16April 19, 2015 11:28 AM

God, to be in London this summer - Imelda's getting total raves for 'Gypsy.'

by Anonymousreply 17April 19, 2015 11:34 AM

[quote]"I've had enough to eat today."

This one is just stupid...people have enough to eat somtimes.

by Anonymousreply 18April 19, 2015 11:43 AM

"I'm worried that people at work will think my ideas are stupid."

by Anonymousreply 19April 19, 2015 11:46 AM

"No pecs, no sex!"

by Anonymousreply 20April 19, 2015 11:47 AM

Even though the words were first uttered by a straight man in a film, "Bye Felicia!"

by Anonymousreply 21April 19, 2015 11:51 AM

God, I'm horny. No chicks available to I guess I'll have to suck a dick.

by Anonymousreply 22April 19, 2015 11:52 AM

Omigod, WHO'd where those SHOES with that DRUSS?

by Anonymousreply 23April 19, 2015 11:52 AM

Oh goody, they're doing a revival of Follies! fabulous!

by Anonymousreply 24April 19, 2015 11:58 AM

"Fuck me"

by Anonymousreply 25April 19, 2015 12:03 PM

Fashion Police has been a total disaster since Joan died.

by Anonymousreply 26April 19, 2015 12:28 PM

R8 um, I think they say that--or would like to be in a position to say so

by Anonymousreply 27April 19, 2015 12:47 PM

[quote] um, I think they say that--or would like to be in a position to say so

Which planet do you live on? Planet Gay?

by Anonymousreply 28April 19, 2015 12:52 PM

That is SO rich!

by Anonymousreply 29April 19, 2015 1:24 PM

they say it-just not to other men

by Anonymousreply 30April 19, 2015 1:40 PM

"I'm as moist as a god damn Duncan Hines cake!"

by Anonymousreply 31April 19, 2015 1:42 PM

I work in gay porn for the money.

by Anonymousreply 32April 19, 2015 1:44 PM

Judy, Barbra or Cher.

by Anonymousreply 33April 19, 2015 1:51 PM

Blue is so not my colour.

by Anonymousreply 34April 19, 2015 2:00 PM

Wow, that color is so slimming on you.

by Anonymousreply 35April 19, 2015 2:01 PM

Did you see Andy Cohen's show last night?

by Anonymousreply 36April 19, 2015 2:02 PM

Ohmigosh, that's SO '80s!

by Anonymousreply 37April 19, 2015 2:04 PM

I can't even.

by Anonymousreply 38April 19, 2015 2:06 PM

I'm praying for Joni and sending out positive white light to her!

by Anonymousreply 39April 19, 2015 2:07 PM

You're too short for that gesture.

by Anonymousreply 40April 19, 2015 2:12 PM

This:

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 41April 19, 2015 2:15 PM

R20, I honestly know straight guys who say that (in jest)

by Anonymousreply 42April 19, 2015 2:16 PM

Fabulous!

by Anonymousreply 43April 19, 2015 2:19 PM

I don't know whether or not I can still carry off going shirtless in public. Best to err on the side of caution.

I love her shoes!

Did Joan *really * do all those terrible things to Christina?

I love this new trend in home decor, but will it look dated in a year or two?

Leave Britney aloooooooone!!

I feel fat.

Oh my GOD!!! Gilbert is dead.

by Anonymousreply 44April 19, 2015 2:19 PM

Could someone direct me to a "shit straight girls do not say" thread somewhere online? (for, you know, science). L-Chat has nothing and Google is fruitless, so I figured the Brotherhood here would know....or could another gal on this board start one up maybe?

by Anonymousreply 45April 19, 2015 2:21 PM

Guurl, what the fuck are you on?!

by Anonymousreply 46April 19, 2015 2:24 PM

I start my new diet Monday.

I'm 30 now so life is over in the straight community.

How does my ass look in these jeans?

by Anonymousreply 47April 19, 2015 2:25 PM

I must know strange straight guys, as they do say some of these things, in jest, but happily.

by Anonymousreply 48April 19, 2015 2:26 PM

Wow, this Datalounge thread is funny.

by Anonymousreply 49April 19, 2015 2:41 PM

Fuck me while I'm greasy.

by Anonymousreply 50April 19, 2015 2:48 PM

When is this royal baby going to finally arrive?

by Anonymousreply 51April 19, 2015 2:51 PM

"That dress is to die for" - Ryan Seacrest red carpet interview.

by Anonymousreply 52April 19, 2015 2:55 PM

I LOVE Downton Abbey!

by Anonymousreply 53April 19, 2015 2:56 PM

Would it kill you to be romantic once and awhile?

by Anonymousreply 54April 19, 2015 2:57 PM

Does my ass look big in these jeans?

by Anonymousreply 55April 19, 2015 2:59 PM

Why does it hurt when I pee?

by Anonymousreply 56April 19, 2015 3:11 PM

I love you, man

by Anonymousreply 57April 19, 2015 3:13 PM

Yes! We got orchestra seats for "Follies" with Bernadette Peters!

by Anonymousreply 58April 19, 2015 3:16 PM

[quote]Guurl, what the fuck are you on?!

I actually know a few straight guys who are using the term "gurl" quite frequently.

by Anonymousreply 59April 19, 2015 3:19 PM

Yellow is my favourite color!

by Anonymousreply 60April 19, 2015 3:20 PM

bae bye

by Anonymousreply 61April 19, 2015 3:22 PM

Ever since I let that guy cum in my ass, I've been worried.

by Anonymousreply 62April 19, 2015 3:26 PM

Let's stop at Bed, Bath, and Beyond. I want to change my shower curtin to the season, and pick up a pack of cranberry scented soap.

by Anonymousreply 63April 19, 2015 3:28 PM

Taylor Swift, will you go out with me?

When my baby is born, I'll invite my best friend/roommate into the delivery room!

Who cares about my fiancee, I'll get my personal assistant to go to events with me!

by Anonymousreply 64April 19, 2015 3:29 PM

Did he have a big dick?

by Anonymousreply 65April 19, 2015 3:30 PM

I just can't bear apartments cluttered with stacked books.

by Anonymousreply 66April 19, 2015 3:32 PM

I'll start with a salad with a light vinaigrette please. Where is the gluten free menu?

by Anonymousreply 67April 19, 2015 3:32 PM

I've been invited to a sex party, but I've got a lump on my dick. Should I go?

by Anonymousreply 68April 19, 2015 3:32 PM

I prefer dating in Europe

by Anonymousreply 69April 19, 2015 3:34 PM

I don't believe in labels like "straight".

by Anonymousreply 70April 19, 2015 3:34 PM

"They smell good. They look pretty. I love women. I do."

by Anonymousreply 71April 19, 2015 3:37 PM

"Yasssss!"

by Anonymousreply 72April 19, 2015 3:46 PM

Your pores are almost invisible!

by Anonymousreply 73April 19, 2015 3:46 PM

Lynda Laurence was my favorite Supreme!

by Anonymousreply 74April 19, 2015 3:50 PM

Yuuummm!

by Anonymousreply 75April 19, 2015 3:52 PM

Suck it, bitches!

by Anonymousreply 76April 19, 2015 3:54 PM

OMIGOSH, of course I love '60s music...Dusty Springfield! THE SUPREMES! LULU!

by Anonymousreply 77April 19, 2015 3:55 PM

Inked Latino cage-meat makes Momma's mussy moister than an Easter ham!

by Anonymousreply 78April 19, 2015 4:00 PM

Hillary Clinton is the most qualified person to run for president ever.

by Anonymousreply 79April 19, 2015 4:04 PM

"Camping this weekend sounds like fun! Do we have enough twinkle lights?"

by Anonymousreply 80April 19, 2015 4:21 PM

I like the colour pink.

by Anonymousreply 81April 19, 2015 4:28 PM

The movie quotes:

"But you are, Blanche!" "Fasten your seat belts. It's going to be a bumpy night." "I'm ready for my close up". "I hate her. I hate that Queen!"

by Anonymousreply 82April 19, 2015 4:28 PM

Whatever happened to Jake from Sixteen Candles?

by Anonymousreply 83April 19, 2015 4:29 PM

Whatevs

Adorbs!

BFF

by Anonymousreply 84April 19, 2015 4:29 PM

"Frau" (unless they're German)

by Anonymousreply 85April 19, 2015 4:30 PM

Mmmm, it's burned! The champagne was obviously frozen in the bottle at some point.

by Anonymousreply 86April 19, 2015 4:32 PM

R25 Yes they do. But usually it's to express disbelief/annoyance.

by Anonymousreply 87April 19, 2015 4:33 PM

What's the one deal breaker that will keep you from having sex with a woman?

by Anonymousreply 88April 19, 2015 4:35 PM

R86 What the hell does that mean? Besides, commenting on the temperature of champagne is the kind of thing Sean Connery would say in a Bond film.

by Anonymousreply 89April 19, 2015 4:39 PM

Oh Please. In what universe was Michael Learned a MAJOR star of the seventies?

by Anonymousreply 90April 19, 2015 4:40 PM

It's what Dominique said to Alexis.

by Anonymousreply 91April 19, 2015 4:41 PM

I know the NHL playoffs are on, but Bed, Bath & Beyond is having a Spring sale and I can REALLY use some new seat covers and scented candles.

by Anonymousreply 92April 19, 2015 4:41 PM

For r89:

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 93April 19, 2015 4:42 PM

I burnt my turquoise belt.

by Anonymousreply 94April 19, 2015 4:48 PM

this thread is all wrong. It's not called 'Gay stuff straight men do not say'

by Anonymousreply 95April 19, 2015 4:48 PM

"There's a 91 percent chance I'll run for president in 2016."

by Anonymousreply 96April 19, 2015 4:52 PM

I want to sleep with this girl I just met, but can't because I'll feel like such a whore.

by Anonymousreply 97April 19, 2015 4:53 PM

I have a straight coworker in his late 20s who got reprimanded for calling his female clients "sweetheart" in a condescending tone. Straight guys dont say "sweetheart" in a bitchy way, do they.

by Anonymousreply 98April 19, 2015 4:53 PM

[quote]"I'm worried that people at work will think my ideas are stupid."

This is so true about straight white guys.

by Anonymousreply 99April 19, 2015 4:54 PM

Yes, they do R98.

by Anonymousreply 100April 19, 2015 4:55 PM

Please

by Anonymousreply 101April 19, 2015 4:57 PM

R92 = Straight woman, pleased as punch with her lame stereotype

by Anonymousreply 102April 19, 2015 4:59 PM

"I wonder how Liza is doing."

by Anonymousreply 103April 19, 2015 5:07 PM

None of them can name two members of One Direction, maybe not even one, that's for sure.

by Anonymousreply 104April 19, 2015 5:13 PM

You fool! Season 3 of [italic]The Golden Girls[/italic] was MUCH better than season 4!

by Anonymousreply 105April 19, 2015 5:26 PM

"fiddle de dee"

by Anonymousreply 106April 19, 2015 5:35 PM

Should I just cut my mother out of my life?

by Anonymousreply 107April 19, 2015 5:36 PM

"I'm way too fat and ugly to hit on her."

by Anonymousreply 108April 19, 2015 5:38 PM

Does this tee that shrunk in the wash, make my belly look big?

by Anonymousreply 109April 19, 2015 5:39 PM

I made it through all three film versions of [italic]Annie[/italic] in a single sitting!

by Anonymousreply 110April 19, 2015 5:41 PM

Let's go to the Yankee Candle store !!!!

I am getting my back waxed.

I wish I could be cell mates with Aaron Hernandez!

I forgot to take my Truvada today.

That gun oil silicone lube does not wash our of my sheets!

by Anonymousreply 111April 19, 2015 5:46 PM

Which Bjork album is your favouritest?

by Anonymousreply 112April 19, 2015 5:48 PM

I don't feel threatened by independent women.

by Anonymousreply 113April 19, 2015 5:50 PM

Eunice? That's a person named Eunice?

by Anonymousreply 114April 19, 2015 5:51 PM

I heard Helen Reddy came out of retirement!

by Anonymousreply 115April 19, 2015 5:52 PM

Still can't get over 'Brokeback' losing to 'Crash.' Total travesty.

by Anonymousreply 116April 19, 2015 5:58 PM

I hope I didn't hurt anyone's feelings in that meeting.

by Anonymousreply 117April 19, 2015 6:23 PM

Tear down that BITCH of a bearing wall and put a window where it OUGHT to be!

by Anonymousreply 118April 19, 2015 6:24 PM

It says, "Princess Diana Dead"! EEEEEEEEK!

by Anonymousreply 119April 19, 2015 6:32 PM

The lighting in here is horrendous.

by Anonymousreply 120April 19, 2015 6:38 PM

I love the Pet Shop Boys.

by Anonymousreply 121April 19, 2015 6:40 PM

Did you guys watch Real Housewives last night? OMG

by Anonymousreply 122April 19, 2015 6:43 PM

I love how Nev's chest hairs pop up out of his T-Shirts. That is the only reason I watch Catfish. Oh yea.. I think he and the other guy suck each other off all the time.

by Anonymousreply 123April 19, 2015 6:49 PM

I know straight guys who love the Pet Shop Boys

by Anonymousreply 124April 19, 2015 6:53 PM

[quote]I am getting my back waxed.

tons of straight guys get their backs waxed. like EVERY single jersey guido

where do you live?

by Anonymousreply 125April 19, 2015 6:54 PM

I don't watch that show catfish simply because the two hosts are closeted. I boycott any show that has a closeted gay person or assumed gay person on it.

by Anonymousreply 126April 19, 2015 6:55 PM

I'm in love with this tete a tete sofa.

by Anonymousreply 127April 19, 2015 7:25 PM

Straight guys eat ass, R28. Most won't publicly admit to it though.

This was the first link I found.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 128April 19, 2015 7:31 PM

That's a fabulous window treatment!

by Anonymousreply 129April 19, 2015 7:34 PM

Touch this skin, darling, touch this skin honey, touch all of this skin! Okay? You just can't take it! You're just an overgrown orangutan!

by Anonymousreply 130April 19, 2015 7:40 PM

OPULENCE. You own EVERYTHING. EVERYTHING is yours.

by Anonymousreply 131April 19, 2015 7:41 PM

And for the children that can't take the fact that I still look youthful? Ha! Suffer!

by Anonymousreply 132April 19, 2015 7:45 PM

Pearls with curdoroy? Are you MAD?

by Anonymousreply 133April 19, 2015 7:47 PM

Why, oh why, won't John McCain fuck me?

Miss Lindsey Graham for President in 2016!

by Anonymousreply 134April 19, 2015 8:12 PM

See, they've put the cheese, ON the meat!

by Anonymousreply 135April 19, 2015 8:26 PM

My mussy feels so empty!

by Anonymousreply 136April 19, 2015 9:20 PM

Are you at your ideal beach look?

by Anonymousreply 137April 19, 2015 9:22 PM

How can I please you sexually?

by Anonymousreply 138April 19, 2015 9:24 PM

"A hole is a hole. A mouth is a mouth."

by Anonymousreply 139April 19, 2015 9:31 PM

Amazing thread- just amazing- in a gay chat site.

by Anonymousreply 140April 19, 2015 9:36 PM

Hi, my name is (Michael, Richard, etc., instead of Mike, Rich, Rick, etc.)

by Anonymousreply 141April 19, 2015 9:39 PM

Every time Rupert Friend (Peter Quinn) says "Fuck me" on the "Homeland" program, I get a boner.

by Anonymousreply 142April 19, 2015 9:41 PM

I will have the side salad instead of the fries

by Anonymousreply 143April 19, 2015 9:43 PM

That is my taint you are fucking not my asshole.

by Anonymousreply 144April 19, 2015 9:43 PM

Bros before Fraus

by Anonymousreply 145April 19, 2015 9:47 PM

My cock is 6". Should I just kill myself?

by Anonymousreply 146April 19, 2015 9:49 PM

All we do is party and fuck around. Let's adopt a baby. I hope it's gay. And perfect.

by Anonymousreply 147April 19, 2015 9:58 PM

Let's get out of here, it's a sausage fest.

by Anonymousreply 148April 19, 2015 9:59 PM

oops, that's what gay guys don't say.

by Anonymousreply 149April 19, 2015 10:00 PM

I'm sorry that was my fault!

by Anonymousreply 150April 19, 2015 10:03 PM

Straight guys say that R148. Closeted gay ones do for sure. I've read it many times.

by Anonymousreply 151April 19, 2015 10:03 PM

Elder straights, tell us about young Bette Davis.

by Anonymousreply 152April 19, 2015 10:06 PM

Are there any good best bed and breakfast's on Fire Island?

by Anonymousreply 153April 19, 2015 10:11 PM

This thread died at about r90 or thereabouts.

by Anonymousreply 154April 19, 2015 10:14 PM

You will find the vase with the spray of hyacinth on the cherry credenza.

by Anonymousreply 155April 19, 2015 11:31 PM

I want to spend $100 on a shower curtain, but my mother thinks that's too extravagant.

by Anonymousreply 156April 19, 2015 11:40 PM

Help! I find my uncle hot!

by Anonymousreply 157April 19, 2015 11:44 PM

I'll never stop posing shirtless!

by Anonymousreply 158April 19, 2015 11:48 PM

Hi, my name is John Travolta

by Anonymousreply 159April 20, 2015 12:03 AM

Why does DL hate Julia Roberts?

by Anonymousreply 160April 20, 2015 12:25 AM

[quote]Why does DL hate Julia Roberts?

I don't think they care what DL thinks of Julia Roberts, R160.

by Anonymousreply 161April 20, 2015 12:27 AM

This kid is HOT

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 162April 20, 2015 12:33 AM

I'm going to change my bedding now. It's been a week.

by Anonymousreply 163April 20, 2015 12:33 AM

[quote]I don't think they care what DL thinks of Julia Roberts, R160.

And that's why it's something that "straight guys do NOT say."

by Anonymousreply 164April 20, 2015 12:37 AM

R161 doesn't miss a beat!

by Anonymousreply 165April 20, 2015 12:39 AM

the video at R162 is so lame I had to stop it after 30 seconds. Seriously...how can something that shitty get half a million views?

by Anonymousreply 166April 20, 2015 12:41 AM

r156 wins!

by Anonymousreply 167April 20, 2015 12:41 AM

If Michael Sam doesn't get drafted I'm going to cry.

OMG, he got drafted, I'm crying.

by Anonymousreply 168April 20, 2015 12:43 AM

soft butch

by Anonymousreply 169April 20, 2015 12:46 AM

Tony Geary and Laura Wright had me in tears today.

by Anonymousreply 170April 20, 2015 12:49 AM

R166 because the guy in it is HOT. Keep watching and they show him with his shirt off.

by Anonymousreply 171April 20, 2015 12:56 AM

If you're going to work [italic]Steel Magnolias[/italic] quotes into everyday conversations, at least make an effort to get them right!

by Anonymousreply 172April 20, 2015 1:44 AM

I give a shit about Barry Manilow's sexual orientation.

by Anonymousreply 173April 20, 2015 1:46 AM

Have you SEEN Jussie Smollet's boyfriend?

by Anonymousreply 174April 20, 2015 1:49 AM

Oh my God that dick is huge, i am your thanksgiving turkey stuff me.

i want to cum in your mouth

i want to taste your cum

I'm not gay i just fuck men for the money

I'm gay for pay

Ass is just tighter than pussy but I'm still straight.

She just had a baby dude and i need a blow job, help me out...

by Anonymousreply 175April 20, 2015 1:58 AM

Let's stop at the gas station and ask directions.

by Anonymousreply 176April 20, 2015 2:40 AM

I will not eat cheap caviar. What would be the point?

by Anonymousreply 177April 20, 2015 2:53 AM

And a one, two, three, kick...

by Anonymousreply 178April 20, 2015 6:08 AM

I was drunk that one time but there is no way I'll sleep with princess tiny tits again!

by Anonymousreply 179April 20, 2015 6:30 AM

No matter what I do - my cookies just don't come out fluffy!

by Anonymousreply 180April 20, 2015 6:31 AM

"If Mother would share her yarn I could finish my quilt tonight"

by Anonymousreply 181April 20, 2015 6:38 AM

"Everything was going so perfectly until Lola stepped on my boa"

by Anonymousreply 182April 20, 2015 6:41 AM

My name is not 'Gurl'.

by Anonymousreply 183April 20, 2015 8:23 AM

Its small, it's zippy, it's economical and it's vibrant yellow! I can't wait to tell the guys about my new car.

by Anonymousreply 184April 20, 2015 9:30 AM

"Those red glasses are just the limit!"

Said to me over the weekend in Florida while reading by the pool...yeah, I know...

by Anonymousreply 185April 20, 2015 11:37 AM

"You've never been to Turin? Oh my God, get there THIS INSTANT!"

by Anonymousreply 186April 20, 2015 12:49 PM

Wow that Michael F. has a huge dick; yeah, I'd do him anytime, anyplace.

That (fill in the name of any well endowed actress) has NO talent! I can't stand her in (fill in the name of any movie with well endowed actress.)

Do you think these jeans make me look fat?

The instructor at my gym is so cute!

Are you going to P town this summer?

by Anonymousreply 187April 20, 2015 1:02 PM

Kill it with fire.

Die in a grease fire.

by Anonymousreply 188April 20, 2015 1:16 PM

What were they (he, she) wearing?

They were wearing ________ [fill in ensemble].

The word, ensemble.

by Anonymousreply 189April 20, 2015 1:52 PM

In a pro football locker room, re Gerry Ferraro debate previous eve, in heaven among the milling muscular towel-draped beef:

"We kicked a little ass last night"

by Anonymousreply 190April 20, 2015 2:00 PM

I very much enjoy Madonna's music and I have downloaded several of her albums.

by Anonymousreply 191April 20, 2015 2:16 PM

Let's play "Mommie Dearest". I get to be Joan this time.

by Anonymousreply 192April 20, 2015 2:16 PM

Let's watch "Mommie Dearest".

by Anonymousreply 193April 20, 2015 2:17 PM

Girl, you are fierce!

by Anonymousreply 194April 20, 2015 2:17 PM

I have a wide stance

by Anonymousreply 195April 20, 2015 2:20 PM

Forgive me, miss, I've been socialised to take up as much space as possible but I can see that it's unreasonable and indeed offensive to spread my thighs wide open on public transport. My apologies.

by Anonymousreply 196April 20, 2015 2:27 PM

I was only in a gay bar to bring the word of Jesus to the sinners.

by Anonymousreply 197April 20, 2015 6:22 PM

that Tim Tebow just needs to MARCH RIGHT outta that closely, Miss Thing needs to WORK it

by Anonymousreply 198April 20, 2015 6:29 PM

I wish breeders would go extinct.

by Anonymousreply 199April 20, 2015 6:35 PM

R191 actually Madonna had a HUGE teen straight boy following peaking with the Sex book in 1992.

I have 2 uncles and a cousin who are straight as an arrow, who saw her in concert back in the day

by Anonymousreply 200April 20, 2015 7:09 PM

...

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 201April 20, 2015 7:26 PM

I'm choosing the straight lifestyle...

by Anonymousreply 202April 20, 2015 10:34 PM

Let's watch any movie that's any good or more than five years old.

by Anonymousreply 203April 20, 2015 10:40 PM

I'll just die if I don't get this recipe.

by Anonymousreply 204April 20, 2015 11:28 PM

I'm a top/bottom.

by Anonymousreply 205April 21, 2015 5:02 AM

Is Julia Roberts the biggest actress ever in terms of popularity, fame and power?

by Anonymousreply 206April 21, 2015 5:04 AM

I'll have a Cosmopolitan.

by Anonymousreply 207April 21, 2015 5:19 AM

Chartreuse

by Anonymousreply 208April 21, 2015 5:23 AM

Shortly after takeoff, we will serve complimentary soft drinks, juice and coffee.

by Anonymousreply 209April 21, 2015 5:47 AM

"If only Barbra, Patti, Bette and Liza would star in a Broadway revival of 'Four Girls Four!'"

"'Glee' is coming to an end this year! I'm gonna kill myself!"

"Gay porn stars - what are they REALLY like?"

"Julianne Moore. Seriously."

"STFU while I read 'Real Housewives of Beverly Hills - Season 5 - Thread 10.'"

"This is my cat, Rum Tum Tugger."

"I'm a pitcher, not a catcher."

"Welcome to 'The Tonight Show.'"

by Anonymousreply 210April 21, 2015 5:49 AM

"I take thee, Liza May, as my lawful wedded wife..."

by Anonymousreply 211April 21, 2015 6:05 AM

Ewmahgawww! He's got a bubble butt! Look at that guy's bulge! Oh, my mussy is just dripping! Ewmahgawww, a frau! Ew! Ew! Ew!... but before we dismiss her, somebody get some makeup tips!

by Anonymousreply 212April 21, 2015 6:12 AM

Ready For Hillary

by Anonymousreply 213April 21, 2015 6:21 AM

"Please pass the penis."

by Anonymousreply 214April 21, 2015 6:28 AM

What does Tom Brady see in Gisele?

by Anonymousreply 215April 21, 2015 6:31 AM

Are we just doing your roots today, love?

by Anonymousreply 216April 21, 2015 6:50 AM

Another thing I said - this tech was drawing blood and I got a whiff of his scent, "What's that you're wearing?" said I. "Scrubs," he replied with a surprised look.

by Anonymousreply 217April 21, 2015 7:40 AM

"Either that wallpaper goes, or I do."

by Anonymousreply 218April 21, 2015 9:49 AM

“Oh, by the thrice-beshitten shroud of Lazarus!"

by Anonymousreply 219April 21, 2015 9:53 AM

"Who moved my steel-cut oats?"

by Anonymousreply 220April 21, 2015 9:58 AM

Taupe

by Anonymousreply 221April 21, 2015 3:04 PM

Fasten your seatbelts, it's going to be a bumpy night.

by Anonymousreply 222April 21, 2015 3:07 PM

I love Bette Davis and Joan Crawford and Barbara Stanwyck movies. Judy Garland is my favorite singer next to Barbra Streisand. Liza Minnelli should have made a biopic of her mother. Madonna is the greatest singer of all time. I love all of the housewives shows and Andy Cohen! I'm the STAR of The Tonight Show!

by Anonymousreply 223April 21, 2015 3:14 PM

Evah

Ovah

Staaaaaaaah

by Anonymousreply 224April 21, 2015 3:18 PM

You are lying like a rug R200.

by Anonymousreply 225April 21, 2015 4:59 PM

Her "girls" are way too big for that dress.

by Anonymousreply 226April 21, 2015 8:11 PM

Though that's something I've heard straight women say, R226.

by Anonymousreply 227April 21, 2015 8:13 PM

They never say...

"I wonder what the gay guys think of us?"

"Do the gays approve of what we think, do & say?"

No, sistuhs, they don't give a shit what we think & they could care less about our approval.

by Anonymousreply 228April 21, 2015 8:18 PM

This has had a longer run than my "Howard's rocks" OP from back in the day!

by Anonymousreply 229April 21, 2015 8:19 PM

[quote]No, sistuhs, they don't give a shit what we think & they could care less about our approval.

Could or could not? What do you mean?

by Anonymousreply 230April 21, 2015 8:26 PM

R230: straight guys don't care whether gays approve of anything they do, or not.

by Anonymousreply 231April 21, 2015 8:30 PM

His hole was moist like a snack cake.

by Anonymousreply 232April 21, 2015 8:31 PM

R227, yes, women's fashion being a shared interest of gay men & straight women.

by Anonymousreply 233April 21, 2015 8:36 PM

Don't mess up my hair.

by Anonymousreply 234April 21, 2015 8:40 PM

Tit muscles

by Anonymousreply 235April 21, 2015 8:44 PM

"Mama's mussy is leaking like a rusty radiator"

by Anonymousreply 236April 21, 2015 9:25 PM

Jejune.

by Anonymousreply 237April 21, 2015 9:33 PM

Julia Sugarbaker made me want to stand up and cheer when she let Imogene Salinger have it for being such a homophobic cunt.

by Anonymousreply 238April 21, 2015 9:42 PM

Gilbert Blythe is dead? You're kidding, right? Right? RIGHT?!?!?!?!?

by Anonymousreply 239April 21, 2015 9:43 PM

I want to watch [italic]Frozen[/italic] again for the 27th time.

by Anonymousreply 240April 21, 2015 9:47 PM

Last night I went by one of my straight friends appt for a drink

He had a few straight buddies over & we were talking about the summer etc

I said " the other day I went to the shop & wanted to buy a bronzer for my face, so I could have a bit of glow" "It's amazing how many there ate even some with sparkles"

It brought the room to a screeching halt , few raised eyebrows & WTF looks on thier face!

That's when I realize there was still a big divide between straight and gay men

by Anonymousreply 241April 21, 2015 9:54 PM

R241: Let me be the first to say it...

M-A-R-Y !!!!

But I love the story.

Good for you to bring some style to a room full of straight bros!

by Anonymousreply 242April 21, 2015 10:01 PM

Great story, R241.

by Anonymousreply 243April 21, 2015 10:15 PM

Jazz hands

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 244April 21, 2015 10:50 PM

r241, are you kidding? How would you expect a straight man to react to that?!

by Anonymousreply 245April 21, 2015 11:35 PM

R241 I should have also added all Italian & 3 cops in the group

I was just talking & it just came out, didn't really censor myself.

It was funny to see their expressions.

by Anonymousreply 246April 22, 2015 12:08 AM

[quote]I'll have an Apple-tini.

I've told this before, but some years ago when I was doing some cater-waitering, I was getting drinks for the cast of "Elf" at a private cocktail party at the producer's home. Only the stars and director were invited. I was definitely surprised when the first person to arrive asked for an Apple-tini. It was James Caan!

I guess Apple-tinis are not so gay after all.

by Anonymousreply 247April 22, 2015 12:25 AM

R241, honey bunny, the same thing would happen with me and all my GAY friends, I don't know a single male who owns bronzer.

by Anonymousreply 248April 22, 2015 12:27 AM

True story: When I was in the Navy, I was with three straight guys and they were talking about a pretty girl.

Pretending to be interested too and to find out which one they were talking about I asked: "You mean the one in the fushia?"

Oh, boy. The looks I got.

by Anonymousreply 249April 22, 2015 12:48 AM

'How come you don't have a girlfriend?'

Unless they're a close friend or relative and even then it's questionable because the question begs the question. Why do you want to know?

by Anonymousreply 250April 22, 2015 12:59 AM

I'm bi-curious.

I don't believe in labels like "straight".

"A hole is a hole; a mouth is a mouth".

I'm straight but looking for a guy to suck my cock.

by Anonymousreply 251April 22, 2015 1:01 AM

Sure you are

by Anonymousreply 252April 22, 2015 1:03 AM

'That shirt/pants/shoes looks nice.'

Straight men hardly ever pay a compliment to other men.

by Anonymousreply 253April 22, 2015 1:24 AM

they do, but not specific ones like that

by Anonymousreply 254April 22, 2015 1:26 AM

[quote]Straight men hardly ever pay a compliment to other men.

Dude! Your girlfriend is HOT!

by Anonymousreply 255April 22, 2015 1:30 AM

I'll have a diet Coke please.

by Anonymousreply 256April 22, 2015 1:44 AM

Fushia. LOL.

I love it when you try to pass and a parrot flies out of your mouth.

I don't bother anymore, but my youth is littered with stories like that.

by Anonymousreply 257April 22, 2015 1:57 AM

Scientology

by Anonymousreply 258April 22, 2015 3:13 AM

R255, that's exactly what I'm referring to. The compliment issued is always displaced, almost never a direct personal one.

by Anonymousreply 259April 22, 2015 3:15 AM

[quote]flag: [ww] [ff] [troll-dar] They never say...

"I wonder what the gay guys think of us?"

"Do the gays approve of what we think, do & say?"

No, sistuhs, they don't give a shit what we think & they could care less about our approval.

by: Anonymoustreply 228t04/21/2015 @ 04:18PM

But this sort of indifference bordering on arrogance is how ANY majority group thinks, in relation to others perceived as 'minorities', and is not just limited to the sexual orientation divide.

by Anonymousreply 260April 22, 2015 4:35 AM

F U C H S I A, not "fushia"

by Anonymousreply 261April 22, 2015 4:42 AM

My pussy stinks

by Anonymousreply 262April 22, 2015 5:06 AM

[quote]Thank god I'm NOT part of the mainstream!

Yes! What WOULD you be like?

by Anonymousreply 263April 22, 2015 8:51 AM

[quote]Straight men hardly ever pay a compliment to other men.

I don't think this is true at all.

They often worship other men and admire them greatly.

There's usually an alpha-male in their group who they think is cooler than everyone else and they'll tell him so (he's usually a jerk). Less so as they grow older, when they tend to worship the pop stars, movie stars, sports stars of their youth....or any other kind of 'star' in the field that interests them.

by Anonymousreply 264April 22, 2015 8:58 AM

I've gotten complimented more by my straight guy friends and criticized more by gay guys. Maybe I just tend to make friends with nice, sensitive straight guys and bitchy gays.

by Anonymousreply 265April 22, 2015 9:19 AM

[quote]Maybe I just tend to make friends with nice, sensitive straight guys and bitchy gays.

Yes, clearly. Why is that, I wonder?

by Anonymousreply 266April 22, 2015 9:25 AM

I'm going tanning. I need some color.

by Anonymousreply 267April 22, 2015 2:05 PM

We don't do stairs.

by Anonymousreply 268April 22, 2015 3:03 PM

That chick's butt is too big.

by Anonymousreply 269April 23, 2015 6:07 AM

Did anyone watch Kelly and Mark on WWHL last night?

by Anonymousreply 270April 25, 2015 4:03 PM

Damn, now I'll be able to do Bruce Jenner.

I'd rather do Aaron Schock than Mama June.

by Anonymousreply 271April 29, 2015 3:22 PM

Your dick fits just right in my ass.

by Anonymousreply 272April 29, 2015 3:25 PM

So is Luke Evans still with Jon Kortajarena?

by Anonymousreply 273April 29, 2015 3:37 PM

I'm Lindsey Graham and I'm runnin' for Pres-u-dent of the Yewnited States of America!

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 274June 3, 2015 3:41 AM

"I'd better remember to wash my arsehole when I shower".

"Don't worry, I'll do the dishes tonight".

by Anonymousreply 275June 3, 2015 4:38 AM

my CUNT is CUNTASTIC!!!!

by Anonymousreply 276June 3, 2015 4:42 AM

"I'd do Caitlyn Jenner".

by Anonymousreply 277June 3, 2015 4:51 AM

My partner & I often winter in Palm Springs.

by Anonymousreply 278June 3, 2015 5:15 AM

Whatever you say, Missy.

by Anonymousreply 279June 3, 2015 5:27 AM

Straight guys never use the word "sassy"

Ever

by Anonymousreply 280June 13, 2020 11:50 PM

"My FAVORITE Ann Miller movie? Hmmm...?"

by Anonymousreply 281June 13, 2020 11:54 PM

My female work colleague is speaking. I'd probably better not interrupt her in order to needlessly restate her thoughts to everybody else at the meeting.

by Anonymousreply 282June 14, 2020 12:00 AM

[quote] "I'd do Caitlyn Jenner".

[quote]—Says no white man in the future

in fact, Says no person of any color or any gender since (s)he became Caitlyn Jenner, except for the whore (s)he's keeping right now.

by Anonymousreply 283June 14, 2020 12:06 AM

“... and my soon-to-be mother in law is wearing a mauve gown with ruching...“

— a “straight” man I worked with 15 years ago, dishing with a group of office gals, about his upcoming wedding. I looked him up on FB; they are still married and have three kids.

SMDH.

by Anonymousreply 284June 14, 2020 12:12 AM

The 2015 thread bumper is at it again

by Anonymousreply 285June 14, 2020 12:17 AM

Actually they do R280

But it's always sarcastic and a way to mock a woman or gay man

by Anonymousreply 286June 14, 2020 12:19 AM

Any use of "divine" as an adjective. (Unless of course they are talking about religion)

by Anonymousreply 287June 14, 2020 12:20 AM

"Do you swallow bro?"

by Anonymousreply 288June 14, 2020 1:26 AM

Those fake titties are just TOO big.

by Anonymousreply 289June 14, 2020 1:29 AM

Who says divine as an adjective besides drag queens?

by Anonymousreply 290June 14, 2020 1:43 AM

I have seen it used multiple times just this past month on DL R290

Though it's possible the posters were drag queens

by Anonymousreply 291June 14, 2020 1:46 AM

"I'm listening."

by Anonymousreply 292June 14, 2020 1:46 AM

You need a pop of color in this room.

by Anonymousreply 293June 14, 2020 1:48 AM

R290 very much has a 1998 drag queen sensibility. Or just old stereotypical gay guy, so it might be generational.

by Anonymousreply 294June 14, 2020 1:51 AM

No straight guy refers to non-German women as "fraus"

Or makes snide comments about "mug cradling"

by Anonymousreply 295June 14, 2020 1:52 AM

Does my ass look too big in these pants?

by Anonymousreply 296June 14, 2020 1:52 AM

[quote] old stereotypical gay guy,

Which is why we should not be surprised to see it on DL R294

by Anonymousreply 297June 14, 2020 1:53 AM

"Yaaasss. queen!!!"

by Anonymousreply 298June 14, 2020 1:56 AM

R290, the word “divine”, is rarely used these days. I’m 57, and I rarely heard the word in the 70s and 80s. Back then, only older gay men used it. They were hairdressers, interior designers and florists who worked for rich, older women. (Those women used the word, as well.)

by Anonymousreply 299June 14, 2020 2:07 AM

Yeah it’s rarely used by anyone that way

by Anonymousreply 300June 14, 2020 2:10 AM

Quick search reveals numerous instances of "divine" on Datalounge

Post 153 on the linked thread is from last week

[quote] Oui oui oui to Christoph Honore! All are wonderful, but Chanson D’Amour and Dans Paris are especially divine (and both are musicals). Ma Mere may be a bit dark for lost, but it’s unforgettable.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 301June 14, 2020 2:13 AM

Are you talking a warm wheat or a cool lemony?

by Anonymousreply 302June 14, 2020 2:17 AM

R286 it's rare for a straight guy to say sassy

I do remember a few years back, a straight guy I worked with it, said it to a straight male co-worker, he said "Don't talk to me like that, I have no time for sassy children", after the other guy got mouth with him

He was older and said it in the old fashioned way, as another word for "rude" or "and ignorant"

by Anonymousreply 303June 14, 2020 2:21 AM

Plush

Velvety

Sumptuous

Gracious

by Anonymousreply 304June 14, 2020 2:23 AM

Cyndi Lauper

by Anonymousreply 305June 14, 2020 3:06 AM

Straight guys do care about color though.

by Anonymousreply 306June 14, 2020 3:09 AM

R302, what the heck does that mean?

by Anonymousreply 307June 14, 2020 3:11 AM

Who would wear an oversize football jersey and a MAGA hat? So tacky.

by Anonymousreply 308June 14, 2020 3:16 AM

You in danger , girl!

by Anonymousreply 309June 14, 2020 3:21 AM

I've noticed that older straight men will say sassy in regards to even other, usually younger, straight men, talking back or being disrespectful

My Grandpa used to always say to his male and female grandkids, "Don't sass me back", it was a gender neutral term

It's also an old fashioned word, I rarely hear it used by anyone these days

by Anonymousreply 310June 14, 2020 3:21 AM

Another thing they don't say or write.

Sure, Jan.

by Anonymousreply 311June 14, 2020 3:25 AM

You go, girl

by Anonymousreply 312June 14, 2020 3:28 AM

R311 what is that thing?

by Anonymousreply 313June 14, 2020 3:31 AM

A lot of this is stuff I only have heard on DL

by Anonymousreply 314June 14, 2020 3:31 AM

I finally met the girl of my dreams! Now I can finally lose my virginity at the age of 30!

by Anonymousreply 315June 14, 2020 3:47 AM

My mussy is SO tight

by Anonymousreply 316June 14, 2020 3:55 AM

Let me tell you a little something about Deborah Messing.

by Anonymousreply 317June 14, 2020 4:03 AM

“I do NOT like the tone of poster r317 on part 597 of the theater threads!”

by Anonymousreply 318June 14, 2020 4:06 AM

"What's your favorite Golden Girls episode?"

by Anonymousreply 319June 14, 2020 4:08 AM

Boy is my mussy moist!

by Anonymousreply 320June 14, 2020 4:30 AM

A lot of straight guys do say these kind of things.

by Anonymousreply 321June 14, 2020 4:48 AM

I keep my personal life personal.

by Anonymousreply 322June 14, 2020 5:34 AM

Designing Women or Golden Girls?

by Anonymousreply 323June 14, 2020 5:58 AM

What would Mary Tyler Moore be doing with the WJM news crew in the middle of the Black Live Matter protests in Minneapolis?

by Anonymousreply 324June 14, 2020 6:00 AM

Getting shot by rubber bullets.

by Anonymousreply 325June 14, 2020 6:17 AM

Let's shimmy on down to the club.

by Anonymousreply 326June 14, 2020 6:19 AM

"Do you remember the episode of 'Golden Girls' where......."

by Anonymousreply 327June 14, 2020 3:10 PM

I've just bought a new pair of leather shorts.

by Anonymousreply 328June 14, 2020 3:33 PM

A lot of this thread is only stuff really old white gay guy say

by Anonymousreply 329June 14, 2020 3:37 PM

Hi, I'm Lindsey Graham

by Anonymousreply 330June 14, 2020 4:47 PM

He has a SPECTACULAR body!

by Anonymousreply 331June 14, 2020 4:58 PM

"My skin was SO dry, I could scratch the word [italic]dry[/italic] right into my hand!"

"Honey, I love the drag, but your purse is on fire!"

"She was Swiffering the floor with her taint."

"Fur is murder ... [bold]TO CLEAN![/bold]"

"So nasty and so rude!"

by Anonymousreply 332June 14, 2020 5:16 PM

I don't like mens no more.

by Anonymousreply 333June 15, 2020 12:42 AM

R333 wins!

by Anonymousreply 334June 15, 2020 12:47 AM

I have all the episodes of Sex And The City on DVD.

by Anonymousreply 335June 15, 2020 12:53 AM

I'm so horny I'd let a fag suck my dick.

by Anonymousreply 336June 15, 2020 1:14 AM

I think Americans like shocking And scaring melodramatic people like OP

by Anonymousreply 337June 15, 2020 1:15 AM

"That hot bitch over there is passed out, rather than rape her, maybe I'll get her a cab home!"

by Anonymousreply 338June 15, 2020 1:31 AM

He's a HOTTIE!

by Anonymousreply 339June 15, 2020 1:54 AM

Bedtime Stories is my favorite Madonna album

by Anonymousreply 340June 15, 2020 2:38 AM

I'm sorry.

by Anonymousreply 341June 15, 2020 2:39 AM

Gurl, that dress is fierce

by Anonymousreply 342June 15, 2020 2:40 AM

Are you a top or a bottom?

by Anonymousreply 343June 15, 2020 2:56 AM

Could I ask you for some directions? I seem to be lost.

by Anonymousreply 344June 15, 2020 3:04 AM

I have sufficient.

by Anonymousreply 345June 15, 2020 4:00 AM

*kisses doll*

by Anonymousreply 346June 15, 2020 4:03 AM

This cocktail is FABULOUS.

by Anonymousreply 347June 15, 2020 4:12 PM

Does anyone want to go to a museum?

by Anonymousreply 348June 17, 2020 12:51 PM

I'm sorry I raped you.

by Anonymousreply 349June 17, 2020 12:54 PM

Show me your chest.

by Anonymousreply 350June 17, 2020 1:01 PM

"Why aren't my coolest non-binary friends getting laid????"

by Anonymousreply 351June 17, 2020 1:09 PM

I really did douche thoroughly, I swear!

by Anonymousreply 352June 17, 2020 2:20 PM

I scheduled a pedicure; my toenail fungus is dreadful.

by Anonymousreply 353June 17, 2020 9:19 PM

Hey, girl, heeey

by Anonymousreply 354June 18, 2020 12:13 AM

I wonder when Broadway will be open again.

by Anonymousreply 355June 18, 2020 12:52 AM

What's your favorite scene from SHOWGIRLS?

by Anonymousreply 356June 18, 2020 2:29 AM
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