Fucking vs making love

Making love is snuggling and kissing. Fucking is ramming your hard cock into a hole and squirting your hot cum. Get the difference OP?

OP, you wouldn't happen to have a vagina, would you?

What I find stranger is when lesbians say they want to fuck someone. I get that they usually do not mean penetration with a penis, but it seems like such a phallocentric phrase.

"Phallocentric?" Is this a thread where we just make up words? Well, why didn't you just say so?

R4, just because you haven't heard of a word doesn't mean it's made-up.

R4 isn't the brightest bulb.

I just get a little thrill every time I see a post as unequivocally dumb as the one at r4.

too

R4 should apologize for his ignorance. Seriously, he should apologize now.

Back to the point, the OP seems to think that there's something impersonal about fucking and saying so. She wants people who "make love" with their "lovers" to squeal sentimentally about it.

Gay men, little cuntling, often use terms that seem transgressive because they are. They're also men. And they also do not necessarily play the "sex is love" game even with men they love. And sometimes, not that you'd know it, gay men have sex in tender, emotion-rending, loving ways and call it fucking because they don't like you around to pass judgment on them, their words, or anything else about them.

Now why don't you toddle off and go get yourself…. loved.

This thread is turning me on. Seriously.

Same reason black men don't say cock. Dick is what we got fuckers.

A few short answers for you, OP.

1. Gay men aren't the only one who say fucking for sex. Fuck me, let's fuck, is popular for a reason. It's sexy.

2. "Make love" is stupid. It doesn't even mean what it says. And "have sex" is ridiculous clumsy.

3. People with delicate sensibilities who are offended by the word "fucking" are usually lousy in bed.

R10 needs to get laid

It's no Kramer vs. Kramer.

"When's the last time you made love?"

"Probably in college, but I had sex yesterday."

because theyre pigs

I never knew what "making love" meant except it's something old straight married people do. It's like they're afraid to say sex.

I view fucking as just that, a goal to cum, while love making is a process that also ends in cuming. Difference, is emotion. One is about the cock and the other is about your partner.

That's the difference.

OP exhibits a frau mentality. Fraus can't even begin to comprehend sex without love. They think their husband is really going to Lowe's for screws when he's really rushing into the park rest room to stick his cock through a hole in the wall for a bj.

I hate the words "making love." It's just so stupid. People use that term to refer to sex, but sex seldom has anything whatsoever to do with love.

Could care less what anyone thinks but I have no interest in sleeping with a man I don't have feeling for so at this point on my life (38) I want to make love. Fucking is fine... people that hookup and in porn but not for me at my stage of life.

Americans are increasingly becoming trashy and they are obsessed with the word "fuck".

I couldn't turn a sappy song into a minor hit if it was called "Fucking"

[quote]I have no interest in sleeping with a man I don't have feeling for

This isn't about sleeping R22. It's about a guy getting his rocks off.

Frau mentality alert!

Pre-sexual revolution, "making love" had nothing to do with sex-- it was wooing, courting, petting, making out. And pretty much exclusively reserved for a man to perform on a woman. Watch old movies and you'll see what I mean.

They still use the words "making love" on soaps.

Why masturbate alone when you can masturbate with someone else?

That's what a PENIS is for, to be pleasured. Of course mutual masturbation can lead to more, including fellatio and penetration, but it's all just good and safe fun.

Fun

"Making love" is what straight men say to women to get them compliant.

No r27, it was the shorthand of the time.

I'm with Liz Lemon when it comes to the word lovers.

[quote]Pre-sexual revolution, "making love" had nothing to do with sex-- it was wooing, courting, petting, making out. And pretty much exclusively reserved for a man to perform on a woman.

Oops, my bad.

[quote]Frau mentality alert!

Enough with the "frau" insults of other gay men. Some of us are capable of love. Love means making his needs and your own needs of equal importance. Love is feeling joy when he feels joy and sadness when he feels sad. Love is understanding and respect. Love is caring enough about a person enough to only want to share your body with him. Love means being satisfied with what you already have.

The hot person you did at some rave when you dropped "e" on a foreign exchange program vs. getting dressed up, paying for parking, a show and dinner out.

Perhaps you prefer the word coitus, OP?

It's the old Eddie Murphy joke "Who do you want, a woman who demurely purrs " let's make love" or one who grabs you by the hair and snarls "I'm gonna fuck the shit outta you". Except in the second scenario I don't think he was picturing a woman.

And some of us don't need to emulate straight women to have a good time and make lifelong friends, r33

"Making love" is only said by the socially retarded. Sex is not love. You don't have to be in love to have sex. It's a biological function. Mixing sex and love is a recipe for disaster.

R38 = Brian Kinney

[quote]And some of us don't need to emulate straight women to have a good time and make lifelong friends, [R33]

That is the most homophobic thing I have ever heard in my life.

R40 s post is the most idiotic thing I have ever seen.

Now go off and pretend you are a straight woman, r40, go get pregnant, you stupid piece of shit.

[quote]That is the most homophobic thing I have ever heard in my life.

Homophobic????? Where are we getting all these self-hating creeps?

It's a straight chick, r42.

Dr. Cooper/R35 Coitus requires a vagina and boi pussies don't count.

[quote]It's a straight chick.

You think I'm actually a woman because I think promiscuity is wrong, yet I'm the stupid one? What's your damage? Seriously.

"Make love" propogates twee het social engineering and values. "Fuck" enables an alternative to those values and a more honest definition of the act.

No r45, I think you are a judgmental nut who has no gauge for what defines promiscuity.

Men cannot get pregnant. It is that simple. No one will ever be brought to court to raise any children I bear, or any children I produce. That is the basis for the definition of promiscuity.

You are a sick fat ugly straight woman pretending to be a man

[quote]Men cannot get pregnant. It is that simple. No one will ever be brought to court to raise any children I bear, or any children I produce. That is the basis for the definition of promiscuity.

The prevention of STDs is another, and that applies equally to everyone. Equality means equality.

R47 calls me "judgmental" then ends his post with:

[quote]You are a sick fat ugly straight woman pretending to be a man

You're a hypocrite and a jerk who's afraid of commitment because of his internalized homophobia. Who'd want to be in a relationship with R26/R29/R30/R37/R41/R43/R47 anyway? When you die single and lonely, don't say I didn't warn you.

Yes r48 and when you straight women take the same precautions I do, I will discuss this with you.

Heterosexuals who say gay men cannot commit and be faithful to one another are homophobic.

Gays who say gay men cannot commit and be faithful to one another are self-hating.

[quote]Yes [R48] and when you straight women take the same precautions I do, I will discuss this with you.

Only a self-loathing homophobe refers to heterosexuals as "straight."

Your hypotheticals have that usual tinge of female hysteria. No facts, just a big old heap of womanly bullshit. Lots of fiction about other peoples lives, like those romance novels you straight chicks get wet to.

I never said anyone can't, r51, I said we don't require it like needy crazed women do.

r3 How should lesbians refer to them wanting to have sex with someone.

Is that a fact r52? Please stop trying to make me laugh with your romance novel platitudes.

Why do these threads degenerate into bashing gay men over the head with het social values and constructs? Why are gay men expected to replicate Ozzie and Harriet?

And you get all your stereotypes about gay people's wants and desires from the same people who encourage and profit off gay promiscuity: the booze industry. I get my data from reliable sources, and if you won't trust the CDC, who will you trust? HIV seroconversions are down as a whole in every group except young gay men.

Think about the gay men who don't seroconvert. What do they all have in common? They play it safe and they limit the number of sexual partners they have. The ones in monogamous relationships who catch it catch it because they cheat. This is not exactly rocket science.

Thank you r57

[quote]Why are gay men expected to replicate Ozzie and Harriet?

Why don't you ask all those couples who are already out there getting marriage licenses in spite of people like you essentially calling them sell-outs for taking advantage of what we've always wanted in the first place? Frankly, all children would be better off with gay parents than heterosexual ones. All of them.

Blow it out your female ass r58. I fuck around and I take precautions and I have not seroconverted.

IMO "fucking" is fine to use when you're having sex with either a friend with benefits or hookup. If you're in a relationship, I prefer "making love". "Fucking" is a term that takes the emotion out of sex. "Making love" means there is an emotional connection between the sex partners.

[quote]Blow it out your female ass [R58]. I fuck around and I take precautions and I have not seroconverted.

Why should I take anything you have to say when you actually believe I'm a woman?

The desire for romantic love is not needy. It's normal. Neediness is not knowing when to back down and having nothing else going on in your life.

Your are the one calling them sell outs r60, the rest of us are saying ther e is more than one way to be gay. If I fell in love I would get married. Until I do, I will fuck around. Don't like it? That's fine, I don't fuck women like you. You have nothing to worry about.

Thank you R62.

I was responding to some asshole who compared gay monogamy to a 1950s sitcom.

[quote]the rest of us are saying ther e is more than one way to be gay.

You're the one saying gays shouldn't be monogamous and accusing me of being a woman. You're a homophobe.

R66, please point out where I said gays should not be monogamous.

I think you are wildly homophobic and straight centric r66.

R60 I don't see the point of replicating the social constructs and values of the oppressor. Surely the LGB (*I'M* dropping the T) community can build more appropriate, alternative community constructs and values that take advantage of hard-won freedoms without necessarily conforming to het values.

[quote]Frau mentality alert!

[quote]And some of us don't need to emulate straight women to have a good time and make lifelong friends, [R33]

[quote]Now go off and pretend you are a straight woman, [R40], go get pregnant, you stupid piece of shit.

[quote]It's a straight chick, [R42].

[quote]No [R45], I think you are a judgmental nut who has no gauge for what defines promiscuity.

[quote]You are a sick fat ugly straight woman pretending to be a man

[quote]I never said anyone can't, [R51], I said we don't require it like needy crazed women do.

[quote]Blow it out your female ass [R58].

[quote]I think you are wildly homophobic and straight centric [R66].

In every single post you make (thanks, Troll-dar!), you equate monogamy with being female, accuse me of being a heterosexual woman, and insult me. And using the word "straight" to describe heterosexuality is offensive because it implies that heterosexuality is the only normal way to be. It isn't. It's not normal at all, just common, as Dorothy Parker astutely pointed out. But someone needs to repopulate the species and it might as well be us, so stop projecting your self-loathing onto me and stop calling other people judgmental when you're the most judgmental participant in this thread. Not only are you a homophobe, but you're a misogynist as well, another negative stereotype of gays you reinforce. I'll bet you weigh at least 300 pounds and haven't scored this decade. If not, well, have fun sexually objectifying strangers.

[quote]I don't see the point of replicating the social constructs and values of the oppressor.

Saying gay men cannot be faithful to one another in relationships is doing just that.

[quote]I was responding to some asshole who compared gay monogamy to a 1950s sitcom.

Monogamy is another one of those het socio-religious constructs that has long been exposed for what it is. An artificial construct that is contrary to human nature. Despite monogamy being largely unworkable, it remains a social "ideal". Like the white picket fence, 3-bedroom home and 2.3 children of the 1950s sitcom. But it's 2014.

R71 misinterprets for point scoring.

[quote]Monogamy is another one of those het socio-religious constructs that has long been exposed for what it is.

Polygamy and polyamory are means by which heterosexual men exploit women. Gay men and lesbians have no business taking part in it.

[quote]Polygamy and polyamory are means by which heterosexual men exploit women.

Only those who seek to be exploited. No one is being legally or physically forced to participate in any personal situation.

[quote][R71] misinterprets for point scoring.

You couldn't be more wrong. Many heterosexuals have multiple sex partners. Therefore, gay men doing the same is reinforcing one of the constructs and values of the oppressor.

[quote]An artificial construct that is contrary to human nature.

Nice use of the appeal to nature fallacy there, buster. Got any argumentums ad populum you want to take a swing and a miss at?

[quote]heterosexuals have multiple sex partners. Therefore, gay men doing the same is reinforcing one of the constructs and values of the oppressor.

I'm sure it must be appealing to an ego like yours to successfully argue with yourself, but multiple sex partners is not the norm or "ideal" in het society.

[quote]Nice use of the appeal to nature fallacy there, buster.

Nevertheless, apt and true, as infidelity and divorce statistics bear out.

You mean these that show the divorce rate going down?

Making love is the best fucking there is.

Fucking or making love? It doesn't matter, either way I am head over heels.

Don't most people say "having sex" these days instead of "making love"? "Making love" feels like a dated expression from a Woody Allen movie.

Somehow, I don't think "Fucking Out of Nothing At All" would have the same ring to it.

I think you mean a Doris Day movie, R81

I wish I could have made love to Tony Randall.

I prefer the term corn-holing or shoving my ramrod up your shit-chute.

This nut who has turned this thread into his/her little essays on monogamy and misogyny is a classic, sex-phobic troll.

The post at R76 sums it up. He/She thinks heterosexual polygamy or having multiple sex partners are all exploiters of women, therefore, gay men who have multiple sex partners are "reinforcing" the oppressor.

Bullshit.

I've gone through periods of monogamy when I've been in love, including a 20-year relationship. I've had no-strings sex with guys, a fuck buddy and hookups when I've been turned on and just want it and have no interest in a relationship. It's the dating where the other guy feels led on or gets his hopes up. But I've never dated guys who are economically able to be "exploited" and the guys I've had no-strings sex with clearly had the same urge that I did and nothing more to worry about. There's no exploitation going on, no "reinforcing" heterosexual oppression.

It's called having an intelligent attitude about sex for pleasure and knowing what you feel and don't feel, and not doing monogamy for monogamy's sake. Period.

R78 Marriage rate declines, so does the divorce rate. Humans usually catch on eventually to unworkable constructs.

This thread is exactly why you are not welcome here, you straight, frau cunts. Take your hypotheticals, your platitudes, and your elephant-sized panties and: Go. The. Fuck. Away. This board was never for you, is not now for you, nor ever will. Just leave already.

r88 or how to ferociously attack invisible women who are in the thread only in his mind not to confront the reality that other gay men don't think like him. Maybe YOU are the one who should take his buttplugs and get the fuck out of here? Crazy woman hating nellies are the plague of our community. Off you go, some glory hole is surely waiting for you.

Wow. This thread is depressing.

I was going to say more, but seeing the level of discourse, it's not worth the time.

[quote]please point out where I said gays should not be monogamous.

R67, when people like R66 claim to see stuff that isn't even on the page, it's probably due to guilt. They scold others who aren't uptight about sex as a way to help take away from their guilt from cheating.

Primal sex is hot, but so unfulfilling.

Making love is a bad choice of words to describe an act that makes your body sweat, smell weird and make odd and embarrasing noises.

Sex was forever ruined for me by a guy who, in the middle of some rather energetic fucking, suddenly declared, "We sound like a couple of wildebeests stuck in a mud wallow."

R10 is the kind of guy you don't want to meet.

[quote]"We sound like a couple of wildebeests stuck in a mud wallow."

Mama said that to Daddy the night I was conceived.

This is for you, R89:

[quote]Don't most people say "having sex" these days instead of "making love"?

Yes, and they have been for at least 20 years.

[quote]"Making love" means there is an emotional connection between the sex partners.

lol

[quote]I don't see the point of replicating the social constructs and values of the oppressor.

Honey, this isn't the 80s. Get over it. Progress.

[quote]Americans are increasingly becoming trashy and they are obsessed with the word "fuck".

Right, because they didn't use the word 'fuck' for sex a century ago.

Men, gay or straight, don't make love. That's a fucking woman thing. Something they tell themselves to make it okay. Men fuck. Sometimes you fuck someone you love, but it is still fucking. Any man who says making love is either a simp or running a game to get into someone's panties.

R100 No, it isn't the 80s. It's the 50s if LGB community aspirations are anything to go by.

R102 is right on target.

"Fuck" just isn't such a turn on anymore because it's used so much

[quote][R102] is right on target.

What was his target? Reinforce as many offensive sexual stereotypes as possible?

You know what, I tried to hook-up without disappointment, and I tried to separate sex from love. I just couldn't do it. I couldn't pretend I didn't feel bad that the guys I was with didn't want to see me ever again. I've been in two monogamous relationships, and going back to hooking up is like going back to hot dogs when you've had Kobe steak. I crave an emotional connection with the men I give my body to, and I think that deep down inside, all gay men do.

R38 Speak for yourself. You are a typical queen/whore who will end up alone and unhappy.

R38 and R102 are spot on!

Amen, R108. Hook-up culture disproportionately favors the young. When you've reached a certain age, you want to have someone to share your life with, each one helping the other through day after day for the rest of your lives, willing to accept each other's faults and personality quirks because you feel so good being together.

R110 I'm way past "a certain age" and am not the least interested in "growing old" with someone. Not everyone is interested in replicating het social values and structures.

R111 et al. are protesting too much. Everyone wants love. When you've had a lifetime of rejection, as these trolls have (understandably), you become defensive.

[italic]fuck[/italic]

WTF are you idiots talking about?? We're talking about fucking vs. making love, not your miserable lives.

r102, I feel sorry for you. I've been made love to by a man and it's incredible.

Hi, R1 here. The thread could've ended there but noooooooo...

R112 Never assume. You will invariably err.

I'm with r116. What a stupid, boring thread. Don't you people have something better to do? Go contribute to a My Friend Julie thread or something.

Anyway on topic, "fuck" isn't really hot to me because it's sort of a general expression of aggression or annoyance, 'get the fuck out my way,' 'I fucked up the TV when I hit that random button on the remote.'

"Make love" is ridiculous, not even intelligible English, but I guess it's a useful Victorian euphemism. Whoever said Woody Allen nailed it. The opposite of hot.

To me the hot way to talk about sex is descriptively, eg 'I know you want it in you now' or the like.

Doesn't the phrase "make love" imply that the love involved doesn't exist before the sex? That's not as sentimental as the term might appear.

Even if you start out as a romantic, all of the mind games and drama queens suck the romance right out of you :(