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20 signs you're at a bear pool party

Anything to add?

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 46December 3, 2018 4:05 AM

The guys have more hair on their backs than they do on their heads,

by Anonymousreply 1July 23, 2014 2:54 PM

that Brad Kalvo serves you a drink and then fucks you poolside

by Anonymousreply 2July 23, 2014 3:07 PM

#21 - The inevitable gross, former circuit queen who's grown-out a beard and chest hair will be there. All the other bears will drool over and coddle him all fucking day.. Half of them anxious to bed him, which they never will, the other half convinced he's their new BFF, all while being unnecessarily bitchy toward themselves via projecting their own self loathing for not having been a roided out muscle queen (who now insists he's a bear.)

#22 - The one more quiet, friendly guest will eventually look around and realize there are no REAL bears at this party anyway, just nelly, obese guys who like to talk about decorating and Joan Crawford, all with more back hair than chest or head hair, and sadly come to the realization that the real bear culture has been destroyed.

by Anonymousreply 3July 23, 2014 3:29 PM

#3 it's true! Crix belly doesn't qualify you as a bear.

by Anonymousreply 4July 23, 2014 3:40 PM

r3, your writing is so garbled. I did not understand what you were trying to say.

by Anonymousreply 5July 23, 2014 3:52 PM

I don't get it either

your party looks like this:

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 6July 23, 2014 4:57 PM

"Anything to add?"

There's bear shit on the woods.

by Anonymousreply 7July 23, 2014 5:16 PM

One more:

The hot tub in the corner that normally has a sign, "max capacity 8", has a handwritten sign over it saying "max capacity 4".

4 bears can easily be a HALF TON (or more!) of seething hairy manflesh.

by Anonymousreply 8July 23, 2014 5:27 PM

[quote]The hot tub in the corner that normally has a sign, "max capacity 8", has a handwritten sign over it saying "max capacity 4".

4? That's being generous.

by Anonymousreply 9July 23, 2014 5:32 PM

Tons of fun

by Anonymousreply 10July 23, 2014 6:10 PM

[quote]10. There's never enough noodles

That's also a sign you're at Datalounge.

by Anonymousreply 11July 23, 2014 6:14 PM

Noodlicious

by Anonymousreply 12July 23, 2014 6:19 PM

The pool filters are clogged with hair.

by Anonymousreply 13July 23, 2014 6:21 PM

I'm somewhat of a bear.. I'm fit, not much of a belly but have a beard and a hairy chest and a small belly. I love the bear community at large, but I find things like those stupid 'bear' movies "Where the Bears Are", "Bear City" etc. tiresome and cliche'. And yeah, more and more bear events, like the Halloween bear week in PTown, have become inundated with the circuit whores who grow some facial hair or who are normally bear-ish, but are cunts who throw side-eyes to anyone who doesn't meet their definition of what's "hot".

by Anonymousreply 14July 23, 2014 6:37 PM

The obesity niche and the muscles niche - can they EVER get along within the bear scene?

Or are they destined to be forever locked in this state of simmering tension and mutual resentment?

I can't take it, I just can't!

by Anonymousreply 15July 23, 2014 6:43 PM

[quote]The hot tub in the corner that normally has a sign, "max capacity 8", has a handwritten sign over it saying "max capacity 4".

An Ursine-American of my acquaintance refers to his hot tub parties as "Bear Soup."

by Anonymousreply 16July 23, 2014 7:40 PM

Yeah, R16... We've NEVER heard THAT clever quip before.. EVER.

*rolls eyes*

by Anonymousreply 17July 23, 2014 8:12 PM

"The obesity niche and the muscles niche - can they EVER get along within the bear scene?"

They're all unmitigated assholes who should die painful deaths in grease fires.

by Anonymousreply 18July 23, 2014 8:20 PM

Um.....bears......a pool?

by Anonymousreply 19July 23, 2014 9:54 PM

R18, oh, really?

by Anonymousreply 20July 24, 2014 1:37 AM

The smell.

by Anonymousreply 21July 24, 2014 11:33 AM

All the bears I've met are Dr. Who fans and interlace their sausagey phalanges over their argyll-sweatered bellies when they are slumped on the couch, litre of Diet Coke within easy reach.

by Anonymousreply 22July 24, 2014 11:55 AM

Most of the bears I know defy par categorizations.

by Anonymousreply 23July 24, 2014 12:45 PM

R23 is miffed. He's a trekkie bear.

by Anonymousreply 24July 24, 2014 1:05 PM

Bears have traditionally been the nicer guys in the gay community; typically 'unfabulous' types, not much into any trendy scene and generally welcoming.

But it's true that the community on average has changed, likely in part due to their own need for acceptance. If you look on many bear sites, both sex-oriented and social, they've become totally branded with the 'club' "bear" type of guy. That circuit guy look, only with facial and chest hair. Not that bears are all about giant, disgustingly fat guys. But suddenly the smirking, brooding, super sexually 'hot' hairy guy, otherwise jacked up.... That's what they project now. Not the "average" looking guy with jeans and a plaid shirt.

That's the fault of the bears who run those sites and events and magazines themselves, not the tiresome aged circuit queens who now find themselves wandering aimlessly in gay purgatory, no longer fitting in with the hot, younger "in" crowd and no real community of their own. Thus, they've latched onto the easiest target, the bear genre. And gradually, they're turning it into a version of the same bitchy, cliquey, classist sub-section of the gay community they dominated throughout the 90s and aughts.. The same crowd that shunned and snarked and eye-rolled any guy with a waist size over 29.

by Anonymousreply 25July 24, 2014 1:18 PM

"Anything to add?"

The party location looks like the land of milking and "Oh, honey!"

by Anonymousreply 26July 24, 2014 1:21 PM

R6 Looks boring.

by Anonymousreply 27July 24, 2014 1:25 PM

I agree R6. I've never heard of it before but the acting is just awful.

by Anonymousreply 28July 24, 2014 1:30 PM

Mr. "Whippet" forces many bears to 'squeeze' for the Charmin.

by Anonymousreply 29July 24, 2014 1:42 PM

R28, it's so terrible I have to watch

by Anonymousreply 30July 24, 2014 1:48 PM

I have always wondered about the fixation many bears have with Disneyland.

by Anonymousreply 31April 22, 2015 10:57 AM

Especially since the Country Bear Jamboree is no longer there.

by Anonymousreply 32April 22, 2015 12:32 PM

I like bears, but R22 hits it pretty close to on the head.

Aside from the uber-muscle bears, many of the "bears" I've met had an interest in:

Sci-fi (Dr. Who, Star Wars, Star Trek, ad nauseum)

Comic books

Gaming (to the point of 12-16 hours a day playing one game)

Experiencing childhood as adults (Disney, theme parks, collecting toys, etc.)

It's weird to juxtapose the childhood toys thing with the I'll-let-seven-other-guys-gangbang-me thing. The mysteries of life.

by Anonymousreply 33April 22, 2015 12:38 PM

The original link is dead, so we no longer have access to the "20 signs."

by Anonymousreply 34April 22, 2015 12:54 PM

The video at the link it gone too.

by Anonymousreply 35April 23, 2015 4:11 PM

Why are you gay man so mean and hateful?

BULLIES! BULLIES! BULLIES!!!!!

by Anonymousreply 36April 23, 2015 4:18 PM

GIven, your definition of "bear", what does one call the skinny Walt Whitman types one often sees at bear events and campgrounds.

by Anonymousreply 37April 24, 2015 11:42 AM

Everything R33 posted, as well as very low or non existent self esteem and body image issues, as well as being obese.

by Anonymousreply 38December 2, 2018 4:07 PM

Karaoke - I saw a massive bear do a Portishead cover which wouldn't seem like an obvious fit, but he was amazing. Isn't there something called Bearoake?

by Anonymousreply 39December 2, 2018 4:33 PM

R37 bears into meth and coke.

by Anonymousreply 40December 2, 2018 4:37 PM

I'm the lesbian who pulled-up in my Volvo thinking it was a womynfest.

After 30 minutes of noshing, the horrible truth finally dawned on me- and I made a quick exit.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 41December 2, 2018 4:48 PM

The same nelly queens (and fraus, but I repeat myself) who hate leather have decided to go after bears today? You're whores are just in the holiday spirit aren't you?

by Anonymousreply 42December 2, 2018 5:10 PM

OP's link is broken:

"Oops! That page can’t be found."

by Anonymousreply 43December 2, 2018 5:17 PM

R42 it's in jest, are you a Frau or a leather bear bottom?

by Anonymousreply 44December 2, 2018 9:32 PM

I adore bears. Sexy AND usually the nicest gay guys

by Anonymousreply 45December 3, 2018 2:53 AM

R44 Leather Top. Wanna ride Santa’s sleigh?

by Anonymousreply 46December 3, 2018 4:05 AM
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