We have so much here for you to do - book clubs, wine tasting night and scrapbooking!
Please do sign the roster and introduce yourself!
Is Frautown gluten free?
I just want to let you know that I will be leaving work at 2:30 today to pick up my kids. Oh look it's almost 2:15, I have to get ready!
It's amazing what one martini can do. When Bob takes me to one of those "parties" of his, I'm always so nervous. But after that martini, it's panties to the wind, y'all.
It's Colton's first homecoming dance and we're looking for a baby blue tie to match his date's dress!
I am the Pinterest queen. With a special interest in cozy, family-pleasin' casseroles.
Urp. Did I just write that?
Hi , my name's Opal, and I run the little antique doll repair shop, on the corner. My husband Jess couldn't make it - he got caught in the traffic on the I 90, because of the construction. Did anyone bring any pie ? If not, I can dash over to Aldos , and pick one up. They have pie, dont they ? Now I am ready for a big glass of Chablis, and some of that good looking artichoke dip. Oh look - there's Charlie. He and Margaret just got back from Arizona, with the Airstream.
Fre-edddddd! Come in here and loofah my stretch marks, will ya?!
Welcome! Hope to see you Sunday at the New Hope Faith Calvary Kingdom of Heaven Evangelical Tabernacle Center! You can find me there every Sunday, and I also teach a 'Zumba' class in their rec room every Saturday morning!
Oh c'mon, everyone knows gay boys are just fraus with waxed asses.
I have to drop Kelvin off at his archery lessons then get my hair blown out but I'll drop by later!!!
Did my McCall's come in the mail today?
I never knew that my lady nether-regions could be so moist until I saw some hunk whose name I can't remember on a Lifetime Channel movie with Valerie Bertinelli!
Ginny in billing, here! Y'all don't forget the company potluck this Thursday. Everybody needs to bring a covered dish and a $5 donation to the Sunshine Fund!
I'm sorry to say this but Frautown is no more. There was a 60 car (SVU) pileup at 2:45pm when all the residents cut each other off in traffic because they are on a SCHEDULE and the schedule is BOSS and they can't deviate from it at ALL.
Over 100 pairs of oversized sunglasses where found at the scene.
Ladies, I never thought I would do this, but I am seriously considering a divorce. Curt and I have been looking for a new house. He had the GALL to suggest that we buy a house that not only wasn't near to all that Des Moines has to offer, it wasn't even open concept, didn't have stainless steel appliances, ONLY had 4 bedrooms, AND there wasn't even a craft room for me or a playroom for Jayden and Hayden. He clearly doesn't even have clue as to who I am as a person.
Why are all my Tom Hiddleston threads being deleted, girls? I paid my $18 and those bitter queens have no right to try and keep me out! I have a good mind to warn my Tumblr followers about this place.
Ladies, my husband Brad joined a gym last year, but he hasn't lost weight or gained any muscle. I find this curious, since he's there seven days a week for at least two hours. It's as though he doesn't even use the gym floor LOL. I'm concered that his testosterone levels are low, preventing him from losing weight and gaining muscle. He shows zero interest in the boudoir, which I've read is another signal of low testosterone. Ladies, how do I approach my man about getting getting his testosterone levels checked without doing damage to his self-esteem?
Skylar just received the amazing results of his IQ test! Imagine little old me being the mother of a child genius LOL!?
I immediately phoned hubby to say that we'd better cancel those trips to the Riviera, Aspen, Dubai and Moscow since we'll have considerably less time to contribute to our little Einstein's Harvard, Princeton or MIT college fund!
Oh, I'll also bring some of Brynleigh's paintings and drawings, she says her main influences are Goya and Watteaux, we're giving her her very own studio for her eleventh birthday! Guess I'll have to find another Yoga-room (but that won't be a problem since we recently moved to a 15000 square feet mansion).
See you at lunch (I might be a bit later than usual, since I have to pick up my new Lexus).
Doesn't Coldwater Creek just have the best clothes? Why, last week my husband noticed that my smart new blazer matches our bedroom curtains!
I am the epitome of style, girls! Be jealous!
I hope these get better.
Yeah, the whole Frau franchise is getting a little thread-bare.
I think that Todd Eldredge is sexy.
Ladeez, there's a sale at Chico's this Friday!
Let's shop til we drop then meet up at Panera Bread for a refreshah!
I host a white zinfandel get-together every Wednesday night, sometimes we even make cosmos. You're welcome to come, we kick off our shoes and have girl talk. It's fun! Daniel (I don't know why he doesn't like Dan or Danny) goes out to play with his basketball friends those nights, it must be really intense because it's hours before I see him again and he's super sweaty when he gets back. I mean, he doesn't just smell like one man, he smells like two!
Where is the nearest Epstein-Barr/Carpal-Tunnel Syndrome support group?
Brooke, office drone
What the hell's a Frau?
Guten tag, wilkommen in Fraustadt!
It's 9:30 am..time to start talking and thinking about lunch.
Anyone for Cheesecake Factory? Email me your orders by 11 please. Sue and I can do a run around 11:45 to pick up. Also just a friendly reminder to gather in the Belmont West Conference Room at 3:30 for Alma's birthday party. Monique has baked her trademark red velvet cupcakes with mocha icing. Yummy.
Renee, I would love to participate, but you know I'm not coming in until noon today because I have a doctor's appointment all morning. Then I'm leaving at 2:30 because I have another doctor's appointment for the rest of the afternoon.
I'm ordering in today. Does anyone want to order with me? Let me go to the desk of everyone in the building and ask. It'll just take me a second to say hello and catch up with them while I'm at it.
Renee girl I can't make it either. I gotta pick up Chadwyn early from school and take him for another round of allergy tests. We think he may now be allergic to pears. OH WHAT I HAVE TO GO THROUGH TO BE A GOOD MOM!!!
What about group meetings to discuss heavy flow days????
Frautown: where everyone has children and no one is left to pick up the slack at work.
I'm Linda from East Orange, New Jersey. As soon as Tom and I could relocate, we moved Madison and Joshie to a small house in back of the Toys R Us in Livingston. We tell people unfamiliar with NJ that we live in Short Hills.
Linda dear, your type isn't wanted in Short Hills. Try Union or Kenilworth...they're more your style, hon.
I just have to forward this to my good friends here in the office. Make sure you know who doesn't get it, Lindy in HR can only hide so many complaints for us!
In an interview Saturday with Jan Markell on the Christian radio program "Understanding the Times," Bachmann accused President Barack Obama of giving aid to terrorists. This, she says, is solid evidence that we have entered the Last Days.
"I’m a believer in Jesus Christ, as I look at the End Times scripture, this says to me that the leaf is on the fig tree and we are to understand the signs of the times, which is your ministry, we are to understand where we are in God’s end time history."
"the baton of global leadership has been passed by America to the Mullahs, the Marxist world, and other dark forces,"
“Rather than seeing this as a negative, we need to rejoice, Maranatha, come Lord Jesus, His day is at hand,” Bachmann said. “When we see up is down and right is called wrong, when this is happening, we were told this: that these days would be as the days of Noah.”
You know you queens are just jealous.
How do these women get to keep their jobs if they keep bunking off all the time?
Because they're MOMS! And being a MOM is the hardest JOB in the WORLD! That's why, r41!
And when they are at work, all they seem to do is gossip.
They should hire childminders or stay at home and let the husbands earn all the money.
So a Frau is basically an irritating shallow middle-class suburban mom, the type who drives oversized SUVs, spoils her kids rotten and has a token job she doesn't pull her weight while the husband earns the bulk of the income?
R40 Actually I don't think you have to be gay to hate this type of woman.
r45 that's mostly accurate, but sometimes the frau has to work out of economic neccesity because her husband doesn't earn enough for her to stay at home and she resents the hell out of it.
Also, fraus love lame activities such as scrapbooking and that kind of thing. And eating at cheesy chain restaurants like Cheesecake Factory.
Hi I'm annoying cubicle/co-worker frau. Do you want to contibute to our office pot-luck party? COME ON!
But is it often that she doesn't absolutely have to work but does if she wants the kind of materialist lifestyle she considers necessary?
Good afternoon ladies. My name is Mark Harrington-Smythe, my husband Franklin and I – yes you heard that correctly, just bought that lovely little 10,000 square foot Tudor cottage on the corner. Yes, r26 your husband Daniel (who plays basketball with Franklin) thought the property would be perfect for us.
Applaud, the fashionable and fabulous have graced Frautown! If you are going to swoon aim for a settee as I simply do not physically touch vadge. Please be informed that on our immaculately groomed grounds, children are to be seen and not heard, preferably seen at boarding schools in Switzerland. Yes, Paco the lawn boy isn't technically 21, but he is very well behaved and muscular and knows precisely what ones does with one’s mouth.
It has come to my attention that some of you have actual employment! Are you poor? Poor people may discreetly observe our glittering élan, but simply will not be noticed – that would be crass, and while we’re on the subject of crass, Linda sugar, that Prada knockoff looks like it was made by blind, hand-less, barbarians. If you can’t afford the real deal, don’t mortify the rest of us with your husband’s failure.
R39 Jesus was a Jew and this neighborhood is restricted – please remember that.
I will be hosting a cocktail spectacular every Friday evening at six sharp (that means eight o'clock Mary Beth, are you a Catholic?), dress appropriately. I do not care about your offspring so read a book, go to the theater, do something that requires you to take your minds off your vain attempts at immortality for a few hours.
Renee, you are henceforth banned from any occasion happening under out roof. “Cheesecake Factory,” how embarrassing for you.
I won't be able to attend the meeting this afternoon where I was slated to make my presentation. I have asked Christopher to step in for me (Thanks Christopher!! I really appreciate it!! I know this is the first you are hearing about this but I will email you my notes and slides before I leave at 1:30). Kayden is sick with a virus and I need to be with him at this time.
That said, the office potluck will STILL be on tomorrow. I will not be at my desk until 10:30 because I will be picking up items for the potluck. I will then be setting up from 10:30 - 12:30. The potluck will run from 12:30 - 3:30. I still need volunteers to help with "take down" as I need to leave at approximately 3:30 to take Madisyn and Kayden to practice. If I do not get two names by 1:30, I will randomly assign two people to be in charge of "take down."
Have a great evening!
Don't most women like a lot of lame crap? (romcoms, chick-lit, celebrity gossip, beauty treatments, shopping, boring TV programs about things like cookery, home decorating)
R51 was pretty funny! R50 tried too hard.
R50 Mark? That a funny name for a girl.
They NEVER come in on the weekend to catch up on work. Ever. Even if the whole fucking department has to come in for an emergency deadline meeting. Then we all go out for food and drinks afterward and talk shit about them.
That was funny, r51! I've actually been in that situation myself.
This is exactly why I don't like hiring women who look like they might be having children soon.
And I'm guessing fraus don't get sacked because of America's ridiculous suing culture.
I sent out an evite to 60 of my closest friends via email, but in case you didn't get it, I'm sending a link to it here on Facebook. It's time for my semi annual Sex Toy Party! That's right, ladies, it's time to put a little spice into your life and wake up your man in the bedroom. Eva from Erotic Desires will be at my house in Malibu from 6-8pm on Saturday to showcase the new line of naughty playthings. No children (or men) allowed! Remember to bring your favorite bottle of wine and I will provide extra beds if any of you need to stay over.
Also, I will be handing out my current catalog of Stella and Dot fashion jewelry in case any of you would like to order from me. Or better yet, join the Stella and Dot family and become a consultant yourself!
So please bring your open minds and open wallets and prepare for a night of giggles and sexy fun! See you there!
HR will do nothing because most of them are fraus themselves who get away with murder at work. Doing anything about fraus in the company will only call attention to their own laziness. Supervisors are afraid to fire these women for fear of lawsuits. A mommyfrau can do pretty much anything she wants, and she knows how to work it.
But I'm guessing they don't get promotions?
Yeah....then they complain about how they're discriminated against. UGGGGHHHHHH!
R61 If that's really true it's utterly appalling. How did they get hired in the first place?
They don't get promotions but they don't care. They just coast. The trade-off of doing actual work is not something they want to do. Some bosses give them coupons for free turkeys around the holidays, and that's enough for them. They bitch and moan about not getting bonuses. They want to be rewarded for doing the bare minimum of work and not being team players.
This one frau in my office is taking tomorrow and Friday to attend a wedding in Maine. She claims she'll need to be offline the entire time. Of course, there's no internet in Maine and of course the wedding will take up both days. I know for a fact that our boss, another frau, told her to put these down as sick days, which is against company rules. Our boss is just as lazy, working home whenever she feels like it. I have heard that the big shots are going to be cracking down on this work at home nonsense, since most of these people are not reachable and are obviously taking advantage. God, I hate these lazy shiftless fraus.
[quote] How did they get hired in the first place?
Other frauen open the gates so that the sows run in. And then those succubi leave for other pastures.
she rolls out of bed and puts on her coke bottle glasses, it was a late night catching up with y&r on the soap channel. she teases her curly pixie cut and applies some blush only. puts on her bedazzled "sassy" tee shirt and tucks and belts it into her favorite jean shorts. slips on socks and into her white keds. todays gonna be different! she might just treat herself and get one of those soy latte thingies
[quote] puts on her bedazzled "sassy" tee shirt and tucks and belts it into her favorite jean shorts.
When it's casual Friday at my workplace, these "ladies" don't know what a belt means. I see more bare exposed muffin top than I've ever wanted to see in my life.
Apparently, the concept of "let me buy a shirt that covers all the skin on my torso" is one that they cannot or will not grasp. They think it's terribly cute to wear tiny pink tees and tanks, but it makes them look like a bratwurst that grotesquely broke free of its casing.
"This one frau in my office is taking tomorrow and Friday to attend a wedding in Maine. She claims she'll need to be offline the entire time."
When this gay man takes a day or week off, he's offline. It's called vacation. A coworker can call in an extreme emergency, but nothing less.
Why hasn't Jennifer Aniston ever been nominated for an Oscar?
Just finished some scrapbooking I'd been putting off, and am gonna make the kids some lunch, then take them to the mall. Brad's not home. Ever since he joined that gym, I hardly see him anymore.
I'll see you all at the Apple & Pork festival this weekend!
Oh look! Misogynistic boys with waxed asses bitching in captivity!
Do NOT feed! Do not tap the glass!
How is it you gents ended up working in these offices?
OK, who the hell signed for my Checkers order? I know it was delivered, cuz I just called them. Took me all morning to decide. Was going back and forth between that and Fridays, but after talking it over with my girls Melissa and Danielle, I went with Checkers. My mouth is watering for a big buford burger and strawberry cheesecake sundae. Now where is my food? If I don't see no bag with food on my desk in five minutes, there's gonna be serious hell to pay. Don't think I won't cut the bitch who took this.
Robinette, Accounts Payable
[quote]How is it you gents ended up working in these offices?
Fraus are in every office, everywhere. You can't avoid them no matter what line of work you're in. And in an open-plan office with cubicles, the fraus are unavoidable.
I'm a gay guy who has an office and door. These fraus are everywhere and are always gossiping about this and that. They're mostly insufferable. Lord knows how their work gets done. When they get too noisy, I shut my door. However, it heats up pretty quickly with the door closed, so I wind up keeping it open most of the time and having to put up with their inane conversations.
"Let's roll, cinnamon rolls!!"
I'm still around, America's Most Notable Female Entrepreneur.
I had this one job where I was the only male in the department. Nearly every day the rest of the department including my boss would kick back about 4:00 to gossip about women they hated in other departments, Chicos vs Coldwater Creek, Kohl's vs Steinmart, who had the most gifted child and who had the most difficult labor. And on and on.
If I needed something and had to leave my office I'd say "Man present. Man present." I wish I'd known "Man on the land!"
On one occasion, however, something sweet (I think) happened. My partner worked in a different department and was friends with the company slut. The ladies REALLY hated her. Someone spotted the two of them shopping together at Costco (they were hosting a superbowl party) and decided my partner and the slut were having a torrid affair. The ladies were livid because how could he do that to me? Anyway, I thought it was kind of sweet but also weird.
Halloween is almost here!
I have posted this on my front door. Can't be too careful.
Actual Facebook post by my ex-sister-in-law.
[quote]I cannot stand it when people play the poor card and they are so not poor!! I am sorry, I am not exactly swimmimg in money but when my kids need or want something I find a way to make them happy like my mom did for me and my sisters. Well there is a happy kid this morning because of me and not his own mother! Come on!
Trixie here. I'm so mad at myself because I missed the white Zinfandel gathering last week. I wanted to chit-chat about our Christmas party night, my place, for the girls. I'm going to bake one of my famous bundt cakes - the one with Andes chocolate mints (we get at the Olive Garden after stuffing ourselves on those fabulous breadsticks.) Remember, for the "Secret Santa", don't spend more than $10, something fun and frivolous that we wouldn't buy for ourselves. Yes, yes, we can't help it, there's always bills to pay, our kids come first, so we put ourselves last. This year was especially tough financially because of hubby Mike - oops, I mean Michael (he wants to be called by his full name now, like Dan.) They joined a gym and those preferred membership are so expensive. It includes the steam room and hot tub because their muscles ache after a workout. I'm so proud of him, he's taking care of himself. He's been playing a lot of basketball lately with Mark and Franklin and Brad and of course Dan. He says he needs more jockstraps to avoid injuries. He drops them on the floor in his manacle. When I go to vacuum, they get tangled up in the Dyson. (I even ruined Dan's once.) Michael told Dan many times to take his gym clothes home. I told him I don't mind washing Dan's clothes. 20 Mule Team Borax goes along way. Brad was mad that I was washing Dan's jockstraps. He told me to just leave them alone - he'll give them to Dan, but he always forgets to give them back and they never get washed. Oh girls - Michael and his buddies drink milk now - and they spill it on the floor. I can't remove those white splotches from the carpet. Any tips?
Trixie here again.. I meant he drops those jockstraps on the floor in his man-cave.
What is your favorite recipe, Trixie, for orange-cranberries Crumble? I MUST know!
It' s funny they can' t keep their legs closed.They pinch out YET ANOTHER brat and WE have to pick up the slack at work, because,you know .......they have kids.
Joy Reed with the Grio, ladies. Here to show you the way.
I simply adore Lemon Poppyseed bundt cake! Yummy!!!!!!
Haven't we already beaten the Frau theme to death!? These are NOT clever and not funny in the least. And believe me, I loves me some good Frau humor.
Yeah, R83 killed this thread. Jesus, less is more.
I thought this was going to be a welcoming place. Sorry to see all this frowny face treatment!
Well, my momma always said try to spread a little sunshine no matter what. So here is my inspiration, ladies. I think what I love about this hobby the most is the way you can mix and match patterns all kinds of ways. Like snowflakes, two pages are never exactly alike!
I feel sorry for these fraus, in a way. They're just so clueless about what their husbands are really doing at the gym. Are they just dumb or in denial?
I have two children in college. I live in PA but would like to move some place warmer.
R92. Oh honey, we don't care about that. A closeted gay man is the best husband we could hope for. Someone else does all the "work" and we get to keep the paychecks. The gravy train goes on forever too because they will NEVER leave us.
R-90 has the attention span of a gnat's fart.
I realise spoiled, affluent suburban moms and trophy wives are pretty hateful anyway but do gays despise them more than anyone?
I've a hunch that many women who are not "fraus" likely despise them more.
Don't forget that tomorrow is Theresa's birthday, so make sure to sign and pass around the birthday card to everyone in the department before the end of the day. If you need us, me, Judy, and Shari will be spending the afternoon decorating Theresa's cube since she's out the rest of the day. We're sure you can handle the stuff in the work tray on your own.
Oh, and Debbie: Please call up Dairy Queen to make sure the ice cream birthday cake will be ready for me to pick up tonight after work.
Girls, I need a household hint. How do you remove white splotches from navy blue carpet? Mike (oops Michael) and his gym buddies just left his man-cave. I think it's milk stains, but it's gooier. Debbie, be a dear. Target ran out of 20 Mule Team Borax -the boys left their jockstraps all over floor - it's wash day, could you pick me up a box at K-Mart? Thanks xoxoxo
Sometimes I like fraud. I like the dumb, haggard, clueless ones
I have a dilemna here. I want to cook my traditional Christmas dinner--turkey, mashed potatos, stuffing, pie. The problem is, my SIL always bring her kids Kaitlyn, Hunter and Georgia with them. The kids are undisciplined and they are a bad influence on my own kids Kaley and Jeremy. Jeremy also has a terrible allergy to peanuts and last year he nearly died because Hunter ate a peanut butter sandwich before they arrived. SIL knows Jeremy has a peanut allergy and she did not even bother to make sure Hunter washed his hands. Plus, she LET him eat something before dinner! I really do not want those kids here! My own kids do not get a long with them either. Plus, Kaley is very sensitive and an indigo child. My husband says I am overreacting and it infuriates me.
I had the most wonderful dream last night. I had a date with Tom Hiddleston. He actually brought me to his home. Guess who was also there? Benedict Cumberbatch and Michael Fassbender. We all got really drunk and had a threesome! And then, I woke up, or rather my fibromyalgia woke me up. My husband John was snoring too and I could not get back to sleep! :(
R102 You should come to our Fibromyalgia support group on Tuesday nights from 7:00pm to 8:30pm at the library in the community room. All we ask is that you bring a dish or dessert to share with everyone.
Hi everyone! Well, little Madyson's daycare called and apparently someone coughed, so I need to go pick her up. I know it's only 9:45am, but I'll be out for the next three days dealing with this.
I know it's the fifth time in five weeks I had to call in "sick" for multiple days, but I'm just being a good mother. I mean, you're gay and don't have kids, so you can't really understand.
Oh and thanks for dealing with all my calls and emails and work projects. When I return and you ask a polite, "Are things ok?" I'll ramble on for 45 minutes until the next emergency so you can't update or complain about anything.
You know, guys. I am a Lesbian and I should be upset about your trashing of women, but I can't stand those whiny-ass frau bitches either. They make my life miserable at the office. Some of those bitches make more money than I do and they are never in the office. They're always off at doctor's appointments, kid's doctor's appointments, teacher conferences, etc.
Shit! I can't even get a day off if I request it a month in advance. Fuck the fraus!
I grew up in a single mother househole with two sisters and they couldn't stand women like this either. My sisters used to make fun of what they called "yuppy bitches."
Straight men prefer Fraus to gays. Deal with that fact. Or maybe some of you fucked a married man once and weep hot tears in the cubicle that he won't leave Janine for you. And why should he? So he can swap Janine's bitchin' , gossiping about celebrity, and pudding recipes boasting for yours? Nah. Not worth the risk of being queer bashed. He'll stay put, cubegayz
The Fraus need to leave now...I am serious!
Scrapbooking is so '90s and over. Even for fraus (who've migrated to Facebook).
Wow, so many of these responses are accurate as hell and funny! Keep the coming. I used to work in a medical billing office...it was frauhell. Bunch of sad, jealous (young and old) harpies who spent the whole day gossiping about dumb TV shows, celebrity gossip, their next purchase at Bed, Bath and Beyond, and spreading atrocious lies about people they hated having affairs with their married co-workers. So glad I quit when I graduated from uni (oh, they didn't like that either. Half of those dumb broads didn't finish or even attempt to get a college degree).
Attention Hiddlestoners: we are having a Loki film festival at my house. My husband Bill is taking my kinds to Amy's house for a sleep over. Amy said she will look after them since she stated she does not understand the appeal of Tom Hiddleston. She is rather a Brad Pitt kind of woman. Frankly, I don't understand the appeal of Brad Pitt. He was gorgeous when he was younger but now, since he has been with that bony succubus Angelina she has pretty much sucked the life out of him. I can't stand that homewrecker!
Oh well, anyway, we are gonna have fun watching 'Thor' and 'The Avengers' and I know we pretty much have the lines memorized. Bring food too. I have pizza, chips, and drinks. We have all night to get Loki (and drunk) woo hoo!
I'll bring the Skinnygirl cocktails!
I will bring gluten-free chocolate cake.
I asked my 16 year old daughter Peighton who loves Tom Hiddleston if she wants to come. She seemed embarrassed and declined. Guess she does not want to hang out with her dorky mother! I kind of wanted her to come since she has been hanging around some friends I don't approve of.
r98 lol, so fucking annoying with everyone's stupid birthday, who cares!!
To those who it may concern, please be aware that I have an important appointment scheduled for Monday afternoon around lunchtime, so I will be leaving two hours early that day, at 11 AM. Theresa and Bethanney have kindly said they will answer any questions you may have during that time since I will not be available in the office or by phone (*sorry*). Because of the Holiday Season, please also forward any questions you may have to Bethanney on Tuesday since I will not be in the office because of our Family Vacation that starts the day after Christmas. Have a blessed Holiday and I hope Thursday and Friday are productive and smooth! Thank You, Lori Ann.
Hi everyone! I know it's only been a week since I gave birth, but I figured I'd stop by the office with the baby because I just KNOW you want to see little Tristen looks like! After all, I'm sure you've never seen a baby before (and if you have, certainly not one that's as cute as mine!).
Good lord r104 I think you and I work with the same frau!
Oh, and what IS this bullshit about "I can't be reached by cell phone or email?" The fraus in my office pull out this fucking chestnut all the time when they cut out early or take days off because of "illness" (yeah, right). Apparently there are regions in the NYC metro area that, amazingly, somehow do not have cell phone service or internet access! Isn't that remarkable! Fucking lazy cows.
Oh, and then the ones who cut out early and take days off because their kids are sick and their kids are fucking TEENAGERS! WTF? I'm sure 16 year-old Skylar and 17 year-old Madysyn will be just fine fending for themselves for a few hours at home with thier stuffy noses and headaches.
My hubby is away working on an oil rig. The Facebook photos of him and the fellas clowning around and having pillow fights are so adorbs! They look so close. I miss him so much! *sad face**
real facebook post
R119 I worked with a woman who was forever trying to leave early to tend to her (perfectly healthy) teenage daughter. Worked with another woman who had to come in late every morning during the summer so she could drop her (again, healthy and normal) 13 year old daughter off at her mother's house, because her father didn't come home from work until noon. You really can't fucking leave a teenager alone for 4 hours in the morning?
Typical characteristics of frauen.
Lack of professionalism.
Obsession with cooking and recipes.
Spend an inappropriate amount of time talking and socializing, usually way too loudly.
Major league backbiters, bullies, and slanderers.
Never have a kind word to say about their husbands.
These threads used to be fun, witty, inspired. Not anymore. Sad.
Call me, R105.
[quote]Scrapbooking is so '90s and over. Even for fraus (who've migrated to Facebook).
True - it's all about Pinterest now!
r124, this hasn't turned out to be a fun thread because it's making people think about how much they hate being forced to work with assholes under grindingly unfair conditions.
Our fraus checked out of the office at 2pm on December 22nd, and we will not see hide nor hair of them until January 2nd. I don't work directly with any of them, and I honestly don't know how they manage to keep their jobs.
Has anyone seen Ginny from Billing recently? I'm worried...
[quote]Our fraus checked out of the office at 2pm on December 22nd
December 22nd was a Sunday - your office works on Sundays?
Anways, most of the fraus have been out of my office all week, and it has been SO nice not having to hear them yap all day about stupid shit (reality TV, church, their husband and kids, recipes, etc). I'm dreading next week when they all come back.
Didn't you hear, Eileen? Ginny had a much needed nose job and don't tell a soul. She swore me to secrecy and you know how touchy she is about that big honker.
I ran out of Twenty Mule Team Borax, have some to spare?
Sad thing is that everything in this thread is pretty much true. Fraus really are like this.
Serious question: What do the fraus do when their children are grown and they can no longer use them as an excuse to skip out of work? Do they think up other bullshit excuses when this happens?
R133 Then it's the grandkids and their elderly parents that they have to take care of.
R100 made a Freudian slip.
Don't forget they'll have to take care of the husbands they've maligned, bitched about and avoided during most of their marital lives. When he dies, they'll play the poor, grieving widow, but silently will be relieved that he's gone forever. He won't be pestering them. The bonus, of course, the big pay off of his life insurance and his pensions and his 401Ks which they'll relish with absolute glee.
[R-136] here. It's their "severance pay".
Hi, this is Freida. I won't be in tomorrow. My relatives are still here from the Christmas holidays. Since they are going sightseeing, I am staying home with the kids. Tuesday is a half-day, right? I mean, they don't expect us to work all day on New Year's Eve, right? So since I won't be able to get in before 10, I'll stay home. I might be back on Friday, but I'll definitely be back on Monday. So, I'll use the rest of my sick time for this year, and take unearned PTO for Thursday and Friday. I already mentioned it to Anna in HR and it is OK with her, so you don't have to worry about giving me the OK. Alright, have a Happy New Year.
Hi Girls, happy new year! Mike (oops Michael) and his best buds wrecked his man cave after their New Years Eve party. They left their jockstraps the floor again and I gotta stock up on the 20 Mule Team Borax. I almost tripped over a tiny brown bottle, video cleaner or something, not sure if I can recycle it. We gave our VCR and tapes to the Goodwill about 10 years ago.
Eileen, don't forget to pick up the Nescafe International Coffee for Ginny's welcome home party. I'll bake my world famous Lemon Poppyseed bundt cake. Thanks, hon.
R-139 here - girls - I'm such a bubble brain….I forgot to sign my name.
Arrrhhh if this is what middle class family life is like, then count me out of it!!! I'd rather my kids hand out with my sister's gay bf who actually is nice with a sense of humor than all of you boring over competitive wannabe bitches!!
Thankfully I don't do scrapbooking, cheesy restaurant chains, or book clubs, otherwise I would be bored our of my mind trying to keep up! No wonder I'm addicted to DL. The guys may be crazy, some certifiable, but they sure are highly entertaining in their demented bitchiness and criticisms.
Happy New Year ladies! I'm feeling so blessed and positive about 2014, it's gonna be MY year! I'm going to lose that 20 pounds and when I do it's gonna be like rawwwr lol, my DH Steve won't wanna let me out of his sight rawwwwrrrrr lolol! So Trixie, make sure that's Low Fat and Sugar Free International Coffee for Ginny's party! Oh and I picked up a Home Sweet Home Yankee Candle for Eileen to go along with the Kohl's gift card, so if everyone can chip in $5 that would be great!
Addisynn and Prestynn both got IPads from Santa and they want the IPad cases with keyboards which I promised if they both cleaned up their rooms... a promise is a promise so I will be taking them in the morning before school so I might be a little late for work, just cover for me til I get there thx!
And ladies...I was at the grocery earlier and I see that Rice Krispies now comes in a...wait for it... Gluten-Free version! Now we can make Rice Krispy Treats for our kids without all the guilt. I feel SO BLESSED! I love you 2014!
Hi Sherrie…Whew! Can you believe I drove to 7 stores to find the Low Fat and Sugar Free International Coffee? I almost gave up but found the last can at Walgreens, tucked under corn pads in the Dr. Scholls aisle. Our family Christmas pictures are ready and I can't wait to show the girls at Ginny's party. Savannah and Tyler look so cute in their matching boy/girl Santa sweaters. I got them at 80% off at Big Lots!
Mums the word on Ginny's nosejob. She swore me to secrecy and you now how sensitive she is about that big honker.
I called Gail in HR, Eileen and I need time off for the party. The guys will tackle the work load. They're single and have enough time to pick up the slack. It's a girls only party anyway, but we can't say that, you know. HR was upset about that last year. Anyway, the guys plan to meet my hubby Mike (oops) Michael after work, for beers.
PS Thanks again for grabbing the last box of 20 Mule Team Borax at Walmart.
Shari, we just HAVE to schedule a playdate for Brayden and Kayden sometime!
Funny, there is an article in today's NY Post, entitled "The Tyranny of the Organic Mommy Mafia".
Says it all. Seems others are catching on to how nit-witted this frau shit is.
We're almost out of Franzia boxed wine!
Mums the word - Ginny just got back from the office and the nose job looks great, but what an ego! The other girls can't stand her, especially since she lost weight and the office guys are now paying special attention her. She wore a padded bra - you know how flat chested she is. I know my hubby Michael won't pay her special attention, he would never cheat on me with women. Besides, he's always with his buddies in his man-cave. I wish they would be neater - I'm tired of cleaning up those white splotches on the carpetting.
Everyone make sure to buy a raffle ticket (or two or three!) in the lobby downstairs during lunch so that you have a chance to win a $25 gift certificate to Walmart! Remember, the money donated goes to charity.