Straight people who don't mind gays of opposite sex
By that, I mean straight women who love gay men (don't like lesbians); straight guys who like lesbians (hate gay men).
There are quite a few young women in my office who love the gay guys in the office (and in general), but they give the cold shoulder to the one lesbian in the whole building. I know that sucks, because I hate straight guys who do the opposite. This is a selective form of homophobia? Do you know people like this?
Aren't you talking about straight people who hate gay people of the same sex? Your headline is worded very strangely.
Do I know people like this?
Yes, of course. 95% of straight people are like this. Straight men know that men are dogs and that's why they avoid gay men. They don't want the same kind of attention they direct towards women directed towards them. Straight women like male attention, even if it's from gay men and that's why they don't pay attention to lesbians.
Yes R1, same idea.
I knew a lot of people like this when I was young, and FYI they all grew out of it.
It was, IMHO, based in sexual fear, fear of being hit on by the same-sex person. Its easy to be friends with someone, when sex is ruled out.
My aunt by marriage. Totally accepting of me being gay - she said she always knew and loved me regardless. But she despises lesbians. She says she was stalked by one when she was a young temp employee back in the 80s. It reminds me of how much Maya Angelou disparaged the lesbian hookers she worked with as a young woman, but adored the company of "jolly male sissies". Hmmmm.
Yeah, I know one like that. Totally fancinated with gay men, really some cartoon idea of gay men. But hates lesbians. Kind of hates women in general, I think.
[quote]Its easy to be friends with someone, when sex is ruled out.
Exactly. Take the sex out of the equation and it's all good. You can't really open up to someone when you're afraid they're going to misconstrue everything you say or do. And you really don't want them hitting on you.
Most gays and lesbians have exactly zero intention of hitting on straight people. The "fear of being hit on" you cite is both irrational and delusional.
It's barely a step away from the revolting "gay panic" murder defense.
Get a clue, grow up and knock it off.
Maya Angelou has had a terrible history with men. If I remember correctly what led to Maya getting pregnant with her son is that she thought she might be a lesbian and was eager to prove she wasn't. Hmm...
I'm a straight woman who's met a lot of straight men who say gay men have been predatory toward them. They dislike being accosted (as do I), but they react much more strongly because it's not common for them (as it is for me) & they've never grown used to it (as I've had to do). I point out to them that this is not typical behavior for most gay men, but once was enough & now they hate the very idea of homosexuality because they're terrified. For obvious reasons, these guys don't object to lesbians who are pretty, & they either treat dykes like pals or ignore them.
I have some lesbian friends (both femme & butch) with whom I have common interests, & that's the bottom line: if we both love animals or cooking or books or whatever, it doesn't matter that our love lives are different. And I'm not afraid of unwanted attention from women (which has only happened once) because I'm used to receiving it from men & have learned how to rebuff it from any source.
The problem with a lot of straight people is, despite their experience, they understand very little of sexuality. They are full of hang-ups. And they are full of shit. Sexual misbehavior can come from a person with any sexual identity. The straights who are worried their same-gender homosexual contemporaries are going to try to fuck them are insecure.