Gwyneth Paltrow freaked out when Chris Martin took their kids to McDonald’s
Do you think Gwyneth Paltrow ever lets her kids have a French fry? She changes her mind about her diet and her kids’ diets all the time, and it’s difficult to get a straight answer out of her either way. Sometimes she says she lets the kids eat Oreos and have one soda a week (or something), other times she’s talking about how she put them on a no-carbohydrates diet. I do have to wonder where Chris Martin is in all of this – does he ever wish that his wife would stop pushing her food issues on their children? Does he ever let them have one French fry each on the down-low?
Well, according to The Enquirer, it might have happened:
While Gwyneth Paltrow went off to do a bookstore gig promoting her ‘It’s All Good’ cookbook in New York’s chi-chi Hamptons, hubby Chris Martin whisked their kids Apple and Moses to a local McDonalds – even though health-nut Mommy had told him to feed them a healthy, nutritious meal because they’d be on the run all day.
When the family reunited later, sharp-eyed Gwyneth spotted a McDonald’s wrapper on the floor of the car – and exploded!
“I thought I asked you to take them for a healthy lunch,” she snapped at Chris, then launched into a yada-yada rant about how she :”can’t understand why he never follows her directions”.
Chris quickly defended himself, saying he’d carefully picked “healthy choices from the fast food menu – and the kids instantly chimed in that they love eating out with Daddy because “he takes us to fun places!” Defeated and outnumbered, Mommy rolled her eyes and groaned: “I give up!”
[From Mike Walker’s column, The Enquirer, print edition]
Yeah, McDonald’s has salads now. And healthy-ish wraps and stuff like that. Do you think Chris follows Gwyneth’s rules all the time though? Or did Gwyneth find a wrapper for a Big Mac? HOW GAUCHE.
Speaking of gauche, have you read Gwyneth’s insane Goop-letter this week? The theme is “Back to School” and you can read the epic mess at the link. It includes “healthy” recipes, of course, and an essay from a lady who hates summer. But my favorite part is the “Back to Office – supplies” part. Gwyneth shills for all of these smaller boutique companies who do fancy, elite, specialty products like… paper clips. And scissors. And a fancy tape dispenser. What kills me is not the price on these items – although the prices are absolutely insane for anyone other the 0.1% of crazy rich people who think that it’s perfectly reasonable to spend $8 on 88 elite paper clips – no, what really kills me is that Gwyneth is too f—king lazy to add hyperlinks to the actual products she’s shilling. The hyperlinks included in the Goop-letter are just to the main pages of the online stores, you have to actually exert time and effort hunting for what Gwyneth has “recommended”.
Between his marriage and his music, this guy has to be the biggest wuss in the history of mankind.
She makes me look reasonable!
"she can’t understand why he never follows her directions” WTF? He's not one of the nannies, or other employess, he's their father, he doesn't have to 'follow her instructions'.
Tho I do wonder how the Enquirer got this story in the first place? Goopy and her husband and the kids were the only ones there... I kinda love the idea that Chris Martin takes all of Goopy’s crap to her face, then skulks off arround the corner and starts calling the Enquirer, all while eating a bag of Doritos and drinking a Mountain Dew.
I'm certain they're never truly alone with their kids.
Can she not fall off a mountain, please? Pretty please?
I do wish she really was a severed head.
So wanting your kids to eat healthy is evil?
Do these people drive around with a reporter in the back seat to record some ordinary family if ever one happens? good grief
Gwyneth should be annoyed - McDonalds is pure garbage and cannot even be considered as food.
It is very unhealthy and literally counter to health.
Especially when you have the means to get your kids healthy food that tastes amazing, Martin taking those two to McDonalds to get unhealthy food that tastes like dogshit seems like a direct attack on his wife. Trouble brewing?
Then again, I'm pretty sure this story is bullshit.
Good parents cook wholesome, nutritious, fresh meals for their kids year round, but are relaxed enough to take them to McDonald's a couple of times a year.
R11, why would you take your kids to McDonalds at all? Unless they raised hell about going, it would never cross my mind to take them there.
"Hey kids, get in the car, I'm taking you to McDonalds so I can feel like a 'fun parent'".
Most of the food at McDonald's is pure poison.
And R12 is correct. Why would you take kids to McDonald's at all?
Especially when you have money to give them healthy food.
Going to McDonald's every once in a while won't affect anyone's health.
I will admit, albeit a bit embarrassingly, that I subscribe to her goop newsletter for the recipes. They are always wonderful.
R14, even if it wasn't all that bad, why would you go there? The food tastes like shit. If I'm going to eat something unhealthy, I'd rather have some good pizza or Five Guys or a big plate of cheesy pasta.
Excellent point, R16.
As usual she has the last word.
Because I loathe that entitled cunt, I have avoided the goop site. Today I was curious and clicked on OP's link; I couldn't even get past the landing page without throwing up.
"A weekly publication curated by Gwyneth Paltrow."
"It's a back to work/school/life mag."
And, after referring to Jill Kargman as an "awesome chick", "Shana Tova my people."
Well, Happy Jewish New Year to you, you pretentious entitled cunt.
She repulses me in every way.
I still hate her for that pretentious list of "10 Things I Can't Live Without." Google it and believe me, if you think you've seen pretentious cunts before, this Gwyneth list will redefine the term for you.
There's a hilarious analysis of it on WWTDD.com.
The issue here is her hyper-controlling nature rather than the fast food, per se. Just because she's orthorexic doesn't mean she should pass those issues on to the children. They will rebel as teenagers and perhaps even go to the other extreme of binging & purging.
Chris bears some responsibility for letting her keep his balls in her purse, of course.
"[R14], even if it wasn't all that bad, why would you go there? "
To show the kids that there's a world outside Mommy's precious little GOOP bubble. And that it may contain good things or bad things (Big Macs), but that it is not to be feared.
R22, you are full of shit.
Your 'philosophy' and idea doesn't hold water.
R23, you are a complete and utter fool and idiot.
Only food Nazis freak out about kids eating McDonald's from time to time.
It's no big deal, ladies. Now head on back to your unnecessarily gluten-free lives and leave the normal people alone.
[quote]even if [McDonalds] wasn't all that bad, why would you go there?
Ummm, because little kids think the food tastes yummy?
Also, they get a toy.
And most McDonaldses have a great play area for the kids, where they can jump and climb and burn off steam.
God, how are DLers THIS fucking stupid?!? "Why would you take a kid to McDonalds", wtf is wrong with you!
He's poisoning them! Now they can't say they live the GOOP lifestyle!
R9/13/17/24/25 is waaaaay too over-invested in this issue.
We get it, hon: you eat excruciatingly healthy, maintain a strict 2% bodyfat level, and would rather go hungry for six months than take a single bite of a McDonalds hamburger.
NOT EVERYBODY FEELS THE SAME WAY.
Some people LIKE fast food burgers and fries, pizzas, sodapop, candybars, ice cream, and other junk.
Some people even EAT fast food, candybars, and other junk, and yet still manage to live a happy, healthy life and NOT be overweight.
You have an issue, hon. It's called "orthorexia", look into it.
[quote][R9]/13/17/24/25 is waaaaay too over-invested in this issue.
Shit, so is R10, R12 and R16. Sheesh.
R27, you are absolutely a complete and utter fool and idiot with your deranged ideas about why to take a kid to McDonald's.
They only list eight on WWTDD.
Insufferable elitist cunt Gwyneth Paltrow has a new interview with Elle Decor magazine and they asked her to list a few things that “she can’t live without”. And since she was born to privilege and deserves to surround herself with nothing but the finest in life, she of course leapt at the chance to do some more thinly veiled bragging.
1. DeGournay hand painted wallpaper – “I indulged with one wall in my London living room covered in a gorgeous pattern.”
Seriously, the first fucking thing on the list of things she can’t live without is hand painted wallpaper. Tom Hanks or Sandra Bullock would have said, “my wedding photo” or “a drawing from my son”. Gwyneth Paltrow says, “hand painted wallpaper.” It’s hard to find prices for most of her stuff but this apparently starts at $650 per panel and the average cost is thought to be $12,000 per room. And we both know she didn’t get anything average. Who the fuck even knew they made hand painted wallpaper? It’s like there’s some secret world out there filled with secret stores. What do people like this do for things like toilet paper? Is there a snooty version of that too? Does someone make a daily chinchilla fur for each of her bathrooms and cut it into squares? Christ I’m scared to even look into it.
2. Seasonal flowers – “I like single-variety arrangements—peonies, hydrangeas, and white lilies—casually arranged.”
God this is so revealing. She wants the very best but doesn’t want it to look like any effort was involved. Expensive things are just lying around. “It’s just money and there’s plenty of that so who cares.” We’re on number 2 and this is already the least relatable list anyone has ever made about anything.
3. Darren Almond’s photography – “His arresting, large-scale artwork brings a sense of majesty to a room.”
Christies has sold a few of his pictures, ranging from $3,515 to $16,250. Because it’s not like anyone can just go take a fucking picture. And what is she supposed to do, hang pictures of her kids, like some pedophile?
4. Charles Edwards Star Lanterns – “I hung three of these at different levels in the stair hall so that we could pass them on our way up to bed at night.”
Her son is gonna be so gay.
5. Antonio Lupi Baia Tub – “It’s in the middle of my bedroom—perfect for a relaxing wind-down and for bathing the kids.”
So yes, it’s not even her main bathtub. I couldn’t find a price for hers, but this one (number 7) from the same company cost $17,300 (update – a quote from the Lupi showroom in Miami, one of only 2 in the US, says the tub cost $9,731). Why, do you just have a tub from Home Depot? And do you fill it with tap water as if you were washing a pig or do you have a crystal reservoir filled with Evian? Oh. Oh I see. How quaint.
6. Religion bookshelf – “Built-in slots hold holy books—including the Qur’an, Bible, and Tao Te Ching—all at the same level (which is how I like to think about religion).”
Oohh, a shelf that holds things at the same level! How regal! My shelves are all at a 45 degree angle because I wasn’t sophisticated enough to buy one that was flat. (please go look at this bookshelf, by the way. She says “which is how I like to think about religion” as if she has some new take on what the artist was trying to say, when it reality, that’s the entire fucking point of the piece. Her keen observation comes because she understood the very obvious message, yet she’s practically taking credit for the whole thing).
7. Clothbound Penguin Classics – “These gorgeous editions make the books so tempting to pick up, again and again. The ultimate cure for sore muscles.”
So she’ll read, but only in the most pretentious way possible. And I love how she tacks on the part about sore muscles, as if she was on an assembly line all day.
8. YUBZ Retro Handset – “A handset cuts down on cellphone radiation. I use this one for my BlackBerry calls.”
Naturally, hers is bright red. “Look at me commoners, here I am! Now is your chance to bask in my glow! You’re welcome!”
So if DeGournay went out of business, she'd kill herself?
Tina, get me the axe!
She's just so unlikeable and pretentious that anything her husband does that pisses her off will please and amuse everyone else.
As if the NE knows what happens inside the car of Goop and Chris Martin, it's hard to get a pic of those two together, please!
Besides I wouldn't take my kids to McDonald's either. The stuff they put in the food is frightening, plus it tastes like shit.
McDonalds food is fucking garbage and I would lash out at anyone who feeds it to my kids without my consent too.
My two year old gets excited as shit when he sees McDonalds or a Chik Fil A. I've asked my MIL if she's taken him there and she's denied it every time. It makes me seethe with rage. He's going to have enough pressure from everyone and every where else to eat garbage that I'd like to start him off right while I still have control over his diet. For what one more year? But I still think Gwyneth is a cunt.
Why don't they feed Apples to Apple and Kosher food to Moses?!
Gwyneth Paltrow,I'd like to kick you in your stupid cunt!
When Winona Ryder was friends with Gwyneth, I wonder what they made of each other's childhoods (Winona spent part of hers living in a hippie commune with no electricity)
I'd pay good money to watch somebody hold Gwyneth down and cram Big Macs up her ass.
I don't believe it.
She would've know instantly because of the residual scent. That crap is unmistakable.
R39 and R41 have aggressive behavior disorder from eating too much McDonalds
"Oh my God. I'm back. I'm home. All the time, it was... We finally really did it ... You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!"
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