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Eyelash Problems

For the blonde bitches with tiny eyelashes, let me tell you what pain is: Pain is having whiplash where one stray eyelash brushes against your eyeball at random whenever you look like this...yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Pain is dealing with assholes asking you if you use mascara when you're in grammar school. I confused mascara with eyeshadow for the longest time. Pain is the fact that your long curled eyelashes also include long curled eyebrow hair, long ear hair, and long curled nose hair. Pain is the fact that whenever you try to grow facial hair, you look like you have mange while the long curly hair dances around on your eyebrows. You micro-lashed bastards will never know the pain of scratchy eyes.

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