Sadly, the 'bear' community, a relevant part of the gay community at large, has become infested by old, sunken-faced club boys who now desperately want a sub-genre to be a part of, so they make a nuisance of themselves with the guys they grew-up shunning and mocking and eye-rolling at the clubs.
Bears began to have their own thing, their own events and a real since of kindness and community. Yet every bear event I've attended in recent years is filled by snarky, prissy, mincing queers who would never have given those guys the time of day in the 90s and early 2000s.
Same goes for the twinks who patrol the bears clubs and events, looking to get fucked, which many bears will gladly do. But the only reason many of those younger or whispy types are there is to troll for tops because they're lazy, gross, sloppy bottoms.
And yeah, the gigantic 300lbers have attached themselves to the bear crowd also, like a piece of uninvited but tolerable velcro. At least they're big guys who generally come friendly and without the judgement the aforementioned trolls come with.
"Bear" used to mean 'burley' or 'non polished', 'hairy' and 'beefy', etc. Now it's become a catch-all term for both true bears, and desperate hangers-on.
Ugh, okay, I sounded like a total asshole douche in that post.. I'm sorry and didn't mean to come across so obnoxious but still, it's pretty much true.
LOL at R3…I was just about to make that observation.
Well, R3/R4, against expectation I was pleasantly surprised at some further signs that "bear" may be expanding from strictly "big as a house" to what you cite as the old definition, when, "'Bear' used to mean 'burley' or 'non polished', 'hairy' and 'beefy', etc."
There are a few quite handsome men who would not spread over three airplane seats and spill further into the aise; beyond that, there are some non-fatties whose septums are not pierced with steak bones and who could fit in easily in a range of settings -- ordinary, non-freakish, at ease with themselves types who fit easily into you Old definition.
Yep r5 but it's still true. Look through those photos or, better yet, show up at a bar's "bear night" or a bear event or, even take a look through Bear411.com.
On that website alone you'll see dozens, if not hundreds of sagging "muscle bois" proclaiming that they're "not really into big/fat/hairy guys", yet they're trolling a fucking BEAR site!
They've suddenly discovered that their appeal in the current club, circuit and event scenes they were once such a big part of is now as played out and empty as their bank accounts. So, they float into the bear crowd, hoping both to be noticed but not noticed.
For a while about 10 years ago, I let myself go a little bit, prone to being more stocky looking when I don't run and workout, and really found a place in the bear crowd and loved it. I still do. I'm a fit guy, not fat, but not and never was a roided out club mary. The bear bars I began discovering down south and later in Boston and New York had guys I liked a whole lot more. Guys who had bbqs on the weekends or who'd have or be involved in events that had nothing to do with clubbing or drugs or dancing. Obviously, that's not all of them, but it's most of them.
So, it's sort of sad to see the bear events and crowd being diluted by the horrible, shallow, drugged and worn-out club queens who now need a sense of belonging.
[quote]generally come friendly and without the judgement the aforementioned trolls come with.
Was about to point a mirror at you, but seems you caught your reflection in the kettle.
I do like the bears, and out of all the scenes, it's the one I feel more akin with. However, many int hat crowd are just as shunning, mocking, and unfriendly to anyone they're not attracted to as the twinks and club boys are. Sadly, it's more to the with the general gay umbrella than any particular subgroup.
R8, why don't you pick up a few lessons on grammar and spelling before attempting to school us on the "gay umbrella", 'kettle'?
I noticed that as well while looking through the pics, r7. I was thinking, "Where the fuck are all the bears?" This should've been called "Urban Chaser". The pictures are filled with hipster otter/wolf types.
Hey r8 I don't think I ever suggested the bear community is infallible.
Sounds like I hit a nerve, and a bullseye with you. How's Splash these days?
Splash? Oh dear..
Aging twinks are growing beards and leaving their cracks unwaxed so they can call themselves "cubs". Anything to get laid.
The guy with the big ol' VPL was hot as hell, with or without the big dick.
VPL guy is smoking hot.
What was that goddamned wildebeest in the blond wig? Fucking hell
as opposed to what, R13?
Vapidly waxing to WeHo excess like you prefer?
fuck off, cuntebago.
ooh, I guess I hit a nerve, #16/former twink. The gays are so adaptable! Go ahead and finish that pizza- more cushion for the pushin'
"So, it's sort of sad to see the bear events and crowd being diluted by the horrible, shallow, drugged and worn-out club queens who now need a sense of belonging."
I just love this sentence...it perfectly describes that scene in such a succinct manner.
Sort of cub
Aim and a miss, R17, you pathetic simpering queen.
Back to "happy" hour for you... or is it another AA meeting?
I think I spotted two real bears in that whole collection at link.
Meh. Bears started as a reaction to club clones, then became clones themselves.
Whatever - to each his own - and I find some of the bears attractive - but why on earth would a middle-aged man with normal mental faculties carry around a teddy bear in public?
I know people from every political persuasion,walk of life,socio-economic bracket,sexual oreintation you name it and I like and am liked by many of them....and WITHOUT reservation I can say unequivocally that in my experience bears tend to be the biggest ASSHOLES of them all. Not HAVE the biggest assholes but ARE the biggest.
Bitchy,catty,insipid,shallow and just as obsessed with a certain "type" as the culture of thought they think they are a reaction to.
R3 I could not agree with you more. Bears may not be for everyone but I've always been attracted to hairy masculine unpolished guys, so I have always paid attention to them. Now it seems there are almost as many hanger ons and annoying queens who would never have paid any attention to the bears, but have run out of places to go. You are right on target.
[quote]"Bear" used to mean 'burley' or 'non polished', 'hairy' and 'beefy', etc. Now it's become a catch-all term for both true bears, and desperate hangers-on.
No, now it means morbidly obese repulsive gay guys.
I wonder if Josh Barro is in there somewhere?
Otters are the new bears
[quote]And yeah, the gigantic 300lbers have attached themselves to the bear crowd also, like a piece of uninvited but tolerable velcro.
That was clever and funny.