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Being around straight guys fills me with terror.

They seem like a whole other species compared to me. They both terrify and intrigue me. The endless sports talk, the competitiveness, the aggression, the cigars, the beers, the poker games, the strip clubs, the lack of emotion, intuition, and sympathy. I can't identify with any of it, and I have anxiety attacks just thinking about being around all that maleness. Yet, I'm intrigued by, full of lust for, and maybe jealous of them. They've got this whole other level of masculinity that for some reason passed me by. I'm much more comfortable around women. Normally I don't think too much about this, but it comes to the fore every time I have to attend some all-male function. My supervisor is having a bachelor party this weekend. It's compulsory that I go, and I'm filled with anxiety at the thought of just being in the company of all these rowdy, tough guys. It's actually traumatizing to be included as part of this pack. Anyone else feel this way?


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