Married, religious (which gives her a license to be bigoted), whole life is kids and her babyman of a hubby. Usually a few extra pounds. Not intellectually curious (the Bible can explain everything she needs to know). Reads romance novels.
Extreme need for self-validation and a space to complain about things she is too stupid to understand.
What makes a frau a frau is a whole collection of things. R6 makes a good start, but I think there's a required fascination/obsession with trivialities... mouse sweaters, scrapbooking, decorating the office for every single possible holiday as if it were important... precious moments figurines, four hundred photos of her cat or dog on her desk...
So nice of r6 to share a pic of his mom with us.
Age: 35 or higher
Weight: BMI at least 25, the overweight zone, and most likely above 30, the obesity zone
Fashion: "Sensible" styles from Kohl's and JCPenney
Children: Several, and she'll be happy to spend HOURS telling you all about their every bowel movement!
Spouse: Started gaining weight as soon as he married, now fatter than his wife, fantasizes about Kate Upton in order to get it up to fuck his wife, spends his Sundays guzzling beer on the couch and watching sports
Job: Clerical, boring, something that will keep her cube-bound until retirement
Favorite artist: Thomas Kinkade (may he rest in peace!!!)
Favorite musical artist: Enya
Car: Beat-up 10-year-old Chrysler minivan or similar
Favorite pastime at work: it's a tie between interoffice gossip and birthdays where she gets a huge slice of cake (and sneaks a second one into her bottom desk drawer, to be consumed when no one's looking)
Daytime diet: Lean Cuisines stashed in the office fridge, because she's always trying to "lose a few," combined with the secret candy stash that will forever prevent her from losing a thing
Favorite celebrities: Oprah, Sandra Bullock, and "dreamy" Hugh Jackman because he's "such a manly man!!"
Favorite Web sites: iVillage, TMZ and a little site called DataLounge
Oh thank Christ, I am none of these things. I do have a vagina and live in a flyover state, so I understand I'm more susceptible than most. I'll be vigilant.
I actually work in a school with 41 women and 2 men. I'd estimate 37 of those women could be accurately called fraus. We have LOTS of potato luncheons, planned Girls' Nights, and wearing of ugly Christmas sweaters. (We had an anonymous complaint by an employee that she didn't believe Christmas sweaters could be ugly because they celebrate Jesus, so we had to change it to "Fabulous Christmas Sweater Day".
I don't have a lot of friends at work.
I don't want this to be an anti-fat thread. Or anti-vagina.
The key points of a frau are the passive agressiveness, the wanting it both ways (inability to solve a problem on her own, but blaming you for taking the solution out of her hands and making her look bad) and the I-love-Jesus-but-stab-everyone-in-the-back narratives.
#14, I think you mean Yanni or John Tesh (though she likes to throw around Andrea Bocelli's name to sound ra-sha-sha).
Enya would be too incense-airy-fairy for her. Might lead to witchcraft.
I'd say any Caucasian heterosexual female over the age of 25 with a household income of less than $100,000 is a frau unless proven otherwise.
R16's fat and has a vagina, and is astonished that she doesn't get what she wants with a thread about frauen on the DL, for Christ's sake.
You're a Frau, dear.
It's not always a bad thing. But denial isn't a remedy.
I am a homofaggotqueerguy and I like casseroles (unless they contain broccoli or celery).
To me, a "frau" is a woman who lives through her self-identification as a mommy.
R7 that is one of the ugliest rooms I've ever seen.
Why can't lesbians be fraus? A lot of fraus look like they could be lesbians though they're not.
[quote]Enya would be too incense-airy-fairy for her. Might lead to witchcraft.
I agree. Hail Satan!
They go to figure skating comps and knit during practice sessions...and eat massive quantities of Entenmann's whilst doing so.
I don't think I'm a frau (I'm a slender, agnostic male), but I love Entenmann's and casseroles!
R19 Sorry to burst your bubble, but I am neither fat nor female. I have a big cock and a hairy chest, thank you very much.
My point was that just having a vag does not a frau make. I like women who have their shit together and are fully formed, well rounded people.
Fraus are all about the things I mentioned.
Oh - and btw, fuck off.
R22 -- lesbians can be fraus if they're all wrapped up in their kiddies n stuff.
What makes a sad asshole a sad asshole?
From what I've observed in my office, Frau 2013 is a person who just gave up "kettlebells" in exchange for Zumba (and changes into her Zumba outfits in the communal ladies' room at 5 pm sharp).
She also leaves "for a few minutes" around 3 pm to pick up her dimwitted 14-year-old from school, and then installs him in the conference room with a laptop and DVDs.
By the way - apparently "Zumba" is some update on Jazzercise that uses Latin pop music. (I had to look it up the first time I heard her going on about it.)
A closet full of plus-sized Quacker Factory sweaters.
I think it has something to do with fibromyalgia and peanut allergies too.
When a "special day" includes lunch at Cracker Barrel and shopping for clothes at Coldwater Canyon or Dress Barn.
When their schedule at work consists of the following:
Thinking about what they'd like to have for lunch, talking about what they'd like to have for lunch, narrowing down what they'd like to eat, actually ordering it, eating it, then walking around to everyone else's cubicle to see what they ate, where they got it and how it tasted, and then spending the rest of the day talking about how good X or Y's lunch looked, and how much they wished they'd have eaten that, instead.
Time elapsed: 9.0 hours
Why should anyone give a shit that women get really obsessed with their kids? Unless you want their attention on you, that is.
Think of the nightmares kids turn into when they're neglected. Even the bitterest DL queen has to admit that a society of neglected children would be much worse.
Someone who makes the rules and feels entitled to do so.
When something is wrong (usually their own self esteem, shocking self delusion and an overall rotten outlook) they consistently blame their favorite blame-worthy scapegoat.
They lust after men who will never be interested in them & resent and talk shit about women who attracted the heart throb they were entitled to. And the guy will invariably see the light & be sleeping with them someday after he tires of his bitch bride.
Oh wait.... that's fags. Never mind.
Why are you guys so obsessed with straight women?
[quote]I am neither fat nor female. I have a big cock and a hairy chest, thank you very much.
R16/R26, tell me more. Single?
No, it's not obsession with straight women. Or misogyny.
I've said it before and will say it again - I know many women who are awesome and have it together.
Fraus? Aren't among them. For many of the reasons listed herein.
Being a woman OP. It's as simple as that.
"To me, a "frau" is a woman who lives through her self-identification as a mommy."
A heartfelt Thank you from a weirdo, 40 year old single woman with no babies. Sometimes, I just wanna slap the bitch who says: Well, you're not getting any younger.
Could a frau also be a woman who tries too hard but misses the mark? I'm in my car watching a young women walk with her husband, she has on slightly too tight dress pants, a couple layered shirts (also tight), a gigantic Talbot's scarf, 3"-heeled mules, and a Coach bag. She can't walk gracefully in the mules, nothing really matches or clashes enough to be provocative, and shit is jiggling where her midsection is fighting with the waistband of her pants and the bottom of the shirt.
I don't dare to criticize her for her weight, as I've been there and remember all too well the fear that I might be waddling or busting out of something at any given moment. At the same time, I also knew wearing unflattering Macy's sale rack clothes that might look spectacular on a model-tall and thin girl wouldn't do me any favors.
This couple didn't have kids, but she just screamed future frau to me. So I wonder if fraus are any women who don't have the natural self-awareness, style, or whatever to avoid looking tragic to others who ARE hyperaware and possibly shallow (like me).
Maybe ignorance is bliss. God knows these women all seem happy.
A frau thinks that Clay Aiken's sexuality is "no one's business" but will talk about Jennifer Aniston's dating and marriage habits like...well, no one's business.
What makes a fag a fag?
Get a life, OP. Most fraus are happier than you'll ever be.
How's your Precious Moments collection coming, R47?
R14 pretty much nailed it. The only thing I would add is they also are always the ones who want to have potlucks and do "team building".
A frau loves to watch all the singing competition reality shows and then discuss them the next day at work.
[qupte] A frau loves to watch all the singing competition reality shows and then discuss them the next day at work.
Oh hell yes.
Really? This thread died at 51 posts?
Perhaps the so called "anti frau" attitude isn't as prevalent as many claim here.
Pearl necklaces? To clutch?
This thread title reminds me of that old Doris Day song "A Guy is a Guy" only in my mind I substitute guy for frau.
"Well a frau is a frau wherever she may be"
"So listen and I'll tell you what this frau frau did to me"
R8. I love that hob goblin in the background
I was really worried after reading R11 (am I a ffffrau?). But then I read R12 and all was well in my world again, assured of my nonfrauitude.
R35, I'm really with you. It's true people go on too much about their kids, but I'm glad children are loved rather than not. It bodes well for future society. If you have to have an all-consuming focus, there are worse things than loving your kids. (No, I don't have any. Just sayin'.)
Let me ask you this: are there any women you guys DO like?
A frau thinks that Clay Aiken's sexuality is "no one's business" but will talk about Jennifer Aniston's dating and marriage habits like...well,
bitching and gossiping like a frau usually does.
What makes a frau a frau?
A frau means when a female acts like a fag, fag like OP.
Given how many recipes show up on DL with dried onion soup and ketchup as primary ingredients, I would say that the line between gays and fraus is rapidly diminishing.
OP is a frau-like fag.
Too many fraus on DL.
Given that almost half of all DL posters are straight people, I would say it's unreasonable for R61 to attribute any specific comments made here to gays.
[quote]I've said it before and will say it again - I know many women who are awesome and have it together. Fraus? Aren't among them.
Oh totally!!! Just like I know many homos who are awesome and have it together. Faggots? Aren't among them.
You're right but R65 is definitely a frau. (Btw, I know I'm a faggot, please go back to IMDB and similar and don't waste your time here.
OM fucking G!!!! R66 is so smart... she sure knows who's who on this board. No real homo would object to frau. C'mon it's not at all the same as f... well you know what! Any progressive knows THAT!
[quote]Married, religious (which gives her a license to be bigoted), whole life is kids and her babyman of a hubby. Usually a few extra pounds. Not intellectually curious (the Bible can explain everything she needs to know). Reads romance novels.
I actually don't think intense religion is necessary. Sure, it takes it to a different level, but I've seen a lot of insufferable frau behavior from women who weren't that religious.
Take your meds, frau.
I have a nosy neighbor in her seventies who fits the profile of a frau up and beyond. Her parents were from Germany and she married a German aspie straight off the boat. She is involved with her Catholic church and worships Mary. She even has one of those tacky virgin statues in her garden. Her weirdo (she refers to him as "shy")aspie husband has a gambling problem and frequents the local OTB upward to five times a day. She can't hold conversations with him so she gossips with and about her neighbors. She considers the gay brother in law of her daughter to be a diseased freak yet she has aspie grandchildren but no, they're not different, they're gifted!
Casseroles. Can't retire from her cubicle clerical job because of her husband's gambling problem. Thinks straight women who have gay male friends are secretly gay themselves. Both homely daughters are the breadwinners in the family. Resents attractive neighbors who are spoiled by their husbands. A big Clay Aiken fan and voted for him on American Idol and was devastated when he came out. Threw out his CDs. Shit, I need to make her our poster frau. She has a really German last name which makes it all so much sweeter. Oh and her aspie daughter is a closet case, we suspect.
Chill out yourself fag.
Thanks I always do, ugly and obsessive frau.
What makes a frau a frau? The same thing that makes a cunt a cunt. Being a women. It's not hard to figure out OP.
If you have frauvergnügen, you are a frau.
So you're saying they need to have multiple personality disorder, R73?
Why do most fraus sacrifice their femininity when they burst crotchfruit from their loins? It's as if their sexual power vanishes as the babies start rolling out. A lot of these fraus even start rebuffing their husbands' advances for sex because they're "too tired" from handling the children.
They do everything in their power to start the "desexification" process. They trade in their blowouts for mom hair cuts. They trade in their alluring dresses for mom jeans. They trade in their stilettos for comfortable walking sneakers. The scent of their favorite perfume is replaced with the scent of baby powder and formula.
These are the same women who are gobsmacked when their sex deprived husbands start looking outside of the marriage to get his rocks off.
Momma had a baby and its head popped off.
Entitled whiny faggot thread.
What a bore you are, frau.
What makes a frau a frau?
This question is a dead giveaway that OP is an unattractive bottom.