Tasteful Friends.... a Chelsea Loft, and a Gay Couple

Barry Goralnick, architect/designer and husband Keith Gordon, composer/lyricist open their Chelsea loft for our inspection.

http%3A//www.newyorksocialdiary.com/nysd/nysdhouse



• That is not a loft. That is an apartment created within a loft space. They killed the loft.

• Any way you slice the cake, those NYC apartments are small, small, small.

• Tedious and cramped.

• I loved it in the first photos but as I continued on I could see the apartment is very small and cramped with stuff. I don't get the "loft" aspect. But I do like their taste in furnishings and especially in art. There's just too much of it. They need a country house to expand. And men that age sharing a mere double bed! Oh my. And that kitchen that's nothing more than a hallway with some new appliances. All that's missing is the little dogette. But at least they've managed to keep all their books off the floor and coffee table.

  Sister Parrish

• [quote]They need a country house to expand. Yes, the space has twice as much as it really should. I thought the interviewed partner came off as a bit snippy. You never know what was cut and pasted, but .... If this was the best of the interview.... I can honestly say, there wasn't much in the pictorial that really moved me...if I had to focus on one thing, the French painting in the entryway.

• It was fine. A bit too much IKEA color going on in some places. Loved the big painting against the dark wall.

• "When Whimsy Met Clutter". I mean, he seems like a decent enough fellow (as far as the typically materially-consumed types go), but his monochromatic hodgepodge looks tired and worn out. It all looks exactly like the work of a busy apartment stager- those people who come gussy up your home when you're selling it. I'm surprised he makes a living at this, he must have a nice personality.

• 19th century French painting, art deco, mid century modern, modern contemporary....that apartment is schizo.

• Way too much stuff, most of it stuff I didn't really like.

• I like it, but urban apartments always end up somewhat cluttered after a few years.

• He seems to be confused about the color brown.

• Or by it, R11. There's so much of it.

• The big French painting is gorgeous but must be quite overwhelming in an entrance hallway? Or is it meant to be ironic?

• These threads lead me to the conclusion that everyone in NYC lives in a horribly cramped, cluttered, and BUTT-UGLY living space.

• I loved the artwork. For that alone it gets a pass. But it's just too cluttered. I get that in NYC that can be a problem, but it ruins the effect. Also, no way do two grown men sleep in that bed. What is it, a double? A full?

• I like it, nicely done.

• I like it a lot. Maybe a bit less brown, but one of the better apartments from this site. Artwork is very well chosen and displayed.

• I like all the books, and the artwork, but a lot of the furniture and patterns seem a little too hotel lobby.

• Dear god, anyone who likes this crap has no taste at all. Of course this is one of the less repugnantly revolting "Tasteful Friends" homes, but still.

• A tad precious, but some nice bits and pieces...

• These would complete the look.

  http://img0.etsystatic.com/000/0/6165833/il_fullxfull.344099448.jpg

  Precious

• I think they're subletting. Kyle Richards owns this apartment.

• Who is this Kyle Fucking Richards bitch so many of you insert into every conversation?

• Thumbs up. They've managed to jam a ton or art into a small space, without making it unliveable, stuffy, or twee.

• Pardon. Pardon. Pardon. Pardon. Scuse me honey.

  all day every day

• Where in Chelsea is this? I wonder if it's the building on 7th with the Whole Foods?

• I love how the flyover idiots who are probably still living with their parents deign to advise on decorating.

• The "colored rubber teacups" cracked me up. Talk about precious. Like the Miranda Richardson character's White Box on "AbFab".

• Roll on the floor LOL, R21, You win.

• I like it. It is modern w/o being bland. It does not look cluttered. The only problem is this squished galley kitchen and the double bed. However I do like the style of the apartment.

  A

• [quote]Closet doors designed to resemble a folding screen are covered in a custom trompe l'œil wallpaper from First Editions. Mes yeux were not tromped.

• WHy is r25 in Wit & Wisdom?

• Have you looked at the linked article with the stuffed apartment?

• Oh it's always the same: shiny floors, a few expensive pieces mixed with lots of secondhand. You can't twirl around in your muumuu without breaking something (and don't touch!). And books, books, books; stacked books, shelved books, coffee table books... don't they have libraries in New York?

• ... or Kindles?

• MTE, R35. You could gain at least an extra 100 s.f. in that little hovel if you just did away with all the books.

• Why would anyone want to live with that huge painting of miserable, terrified white people in the entrance? Because it's French? The colors do go with that olive drab wall, but... P.S. Bravo at r21.

• Another Tasteful Friends layout from New York Social Diary. Scroll down for some of the most intense, least apologetic, Maryosity of all time.

  http://www.newyorksocialdiary.com/node/1909132

• Ideal DL apartment:

  http://www.elledecor.com/cm/elledecor/images/VK/2010-Home-Decorating-Celebrity-Interiors-Lofts-05-lgn.jpg

• Actual DL apartment:

  http://activerain.com/image_store/uploads/2/4/8/3/8/ar12851842483842.jpg

• R39 Not sure I'd want to live with that much white, but those sofas in R40 are positively frightening.

• LOL @ R38. Wow, that deserves it's own Tasteful Friends thread so we can give it its due.

• [quote]19th century French painting, art deco, mid century modern, modern contemporary....that apartment is schizo. Exactly. While it is indeed possible to pull off the "eclectic" look (mixing-and-matching from different periods), it's difficult, and this couple failed miserably at it. Also, you can tell the place was done on the cheap. My God, those ghastly window-unit A/Cs! They have *more* than enough ceiling space to install a central HVAC system, particularly since as R1 correctly pointed out, the apartment is a "loft" in name only. Also, I took particular note of what at first appeared to be a lovely James Mont coffee table ... only to read the caption and see it's "in the style of James Mont." A cheap knockoff, in other words. Also, the kitchen and doors look *barely* above IKEA-level in quality. Oh, and finally, one of my BIGGEST pet peeves about lofts is when they don't install ceilings above the bathrooms, resulting in the sounds of you shitting and farting reverberating throughout the entire loft every time you take a dump. EWWW.

• They've done a good job with olive green, but let's face it, it's an ugly color and their choice of that color to center their relationship seems...a bit over the top. It blairs "I can make any color work! Color doesn't define me." No, hon, you can't and yes it does.

• Done, R42.

  http://www.newyorksocialdiary.com/node/1909132

• What's this, Danish Modern Revival?

• I can't find r45's thread so I took the liberty of starting one myself

  http://www.datalounge.com/cgi-bin/iowa/ajax.html%23page:showThread%2C12588477%2C1

• [quote] You could gain at least an extra 100 s.f. in that little hovel if you just did away with all the books. But they are so decorative!! Really, though. Most of you criticizing their place wish could live there.

• True, R48. And *with* the books.

• [quote]Barry designed the console. Ohhh he "DESIGNED" it. How pretentious. I hate that word. You can find the same ugly thing at any flea market or yard sale all over America for $30 bucks. The idiot probably paid P0 to have the thing built too, but he can brag he "DESIGNED" it!

• Well, R50, be fair. Maybe it had to be a certain size for the spot they put it in and they couldn't find it.

• [quote]The idiot probably paid P0 to have the thing built too, but he can brag he "DESIGNED" it! Sorry I meant The idiot probably paid $500 to have the thing built too, but he can brag he "DESIGNED" it!

• Oh, spare me. Torch the fucking piece of tedious faux-horseshit.

• My reaction when I saw the photos was that someone went a little crazy at Home Goods. In NYC you know what all those books attract in old buildings? Bugs.

• I like the chandelier over the bed. Do you think they would sell it to me? I am serious.

• Too much beige, they're a little afraid of color, but otherwise it's nice.

• Keith Gordon's credits as a composer are...terrible. Presumably the architect paid for all of this. Either that or creative types just have money thrown at them in NYC.

• he reads on the Kindle now because they ran out of book room. It's an apartment, not Stately Wayne Manor, you don't have to say you have a Library. Donate them to the NY Public Library or a nice used book store and pass them along. What the hell is the purpose of displaying them? To prove your literate?

• Exactly, R58. Those books are taking up valuable real estate in that tiny space. Plus, if they got rid of them they would have more wall space to spread out their cramped art collection. People who display books are insecure and have something to prove.

• I think you're all being a mite harsh and it sounds like most of you have never lived in a NYC apartment. Nevertheless, the size of that bed for 2 middleaged men is truly irksome.

• The bed would have been one of the last things I would criticize.

• As a "flyover", yes I do indeed think I can rightly chuckle at people who live in cramped hovels and declare them (and themselves) fabulous because they took what little room they had and crammed it with crap. Two grown men sleeping on that-sized bed is itself a strong condemnation of whatever it is they are doing with their lives. The hallway painting may or may not be an artistic masterpiece, but it sure looks ridiculous in that apartment: way too big, completely out of place, and horrifically gaudy. Did they do a better job than I could in that space? For sure! But I wouldn't waste time pretending the space was enough for two people in the first place.

• Based on DL commentary on food, weight, boylimia, and manorexia, a full-size mattress is all two Chelsea-dwellers need. Why not a twin, in fact?

• R63, that would also explain the nearly-nonexistent kitchen.

• "Two grown men sleeping on that-sized bed is itself a strong condemnation of whatever it is they are doing with their lives." What is the problem with their bed? I don't understand this criticism. How does the size of the bed reflect on what they're doing with their lives? Really, I want to know.

• [quote]People who display books are insecure and have something to prove. This is my favorite post of the day.

• I didn't even think about the bed, then again, I sleep on a full-sized. I had a queen and it was just too big, I moved it to one of my guest rooms. Sometimes in hotels I end up on a king-sized. Those are absurd. It's no wonder people are so fat, it's the coy fish phenomenon, the more space they have the bigger they become.

• I think it is mostly ok, though the bedroom does look kind of small and cramped

• It's too busy, too much stuff, simplify and put some of that crap in storage.

• In older pre WW2 homes, the bedrooms are smaller....so I can remember both sets of grandparents sleeping in full size beds. it is only recently that kings have become standard.

  anon

• I was hoping he was the actor Keith Gordon of "Back to School" and "Dressed to Kill" fame.

• I like it all, but where the frak do these kind of people put their not-pretty stuff? You know, cleaning supplies, toilet paper, boxes of junk, extra things, files? Every one of these photos spreads should be accompanied by the stuff storage locker in Queens.

• R58:[quote]What the hell is the purpose of displaying (books)? To prove your literate? Maybe you should display a book or two, R58.

  Oh%2C%20Dear

• inoffensive enough

• "Too much beige, they're a little afraid of color, but otherwise it's nice. " I generally loathe beige, but I'm going to forgive it here. They want people to look at their art, not the furniture, and a neutral palate works very well in that context. And this from someone who loves color so much that I like the pink-gold-and-orange extravaganza apartment, in the concurrent thread.

• Couples sleeping in a full bed is very European.

• Men that age and that size need to be able to spread out a little....whether they are still having sex or not. I know because my partner and I are that old. They're not two twinks in their twenties.

• Maybe the couple enjoy closeness when they sleep (gasp!) Maybe one of the two gents has another room, not pictured, or even still, another apt? Wonderment.

• I LOVE IT!

• LOL@ R21. I can never get enough of a good surprise caftan joke on DL. I love 'em, love 'em, love 'em!

• Can someone post the original story from the magazine? It has been lost, I think.

• Here 'tis

  http://www.newyorksocialdiary.com/node/1909192/print

• Original link for R81

  http://www.newyorksocialdiary.com/node/1909192

• It changes weekly, R83. Hope this works.

  http://www.newyorksocialdiary.com/node/1909192

• I liked this loft very much.

• Wow r58 and r59 just wow. I love books.i love how they look how they feel and the story behind them. If you were a book lover you would get it.Fuck the beige ,fuck the art I love the books !!:)

• The furniture is fairly hideous -- and who among us hasn't always longed for an arrangement of colored rubber teacups from Paris? Strip away the furniture, and the place is nice enough -- especially by NYSD standards.

• I love books too R86. I just don't happen to think they need to be in the form of big chunky blocks of paper and cardboard that take up space.

  R59