"We already know"— Well, that's not the point, thank you.
I'm so sick of the "OMG everybody knows!" reaction to someone coming out. People don't get it. Coming Out is not about who [italic]"knows"[/italic] already or not. It's not some service to bring the straights into the know.
It's about affirming [italic]oneself[/italic]. It's the confirmation of the fact that there's NOTHING wrong with being gay and being open about your [italic]perfectly human concerns[/italic] in life. Romance, sex, marriage, or not having any of that.
It is about affirming the fact that your life, like any hetero's, will include the occasional conversation to a friend about a partner, a loved one, a date, or a shag- whatever. You have just as much right to feel good about last night's date as the friend who might brag about her one night stand. You have just as much right to openly worry over your partner's illness as the office-mate who might raise awareness for his wife's breast cancer. You have the right to say, "I'm married", "I'm in love", "I'm happy because of HIM / HER"
It has little to nothing to do with what society knows or doesn't know about you. It has everything to do with what you know and love about yourself.
[quote]It is about affirming the fact that your life, like any hetero's, will include the occasional conversation to a friend about a partner, a loved one...
But that's so personal.
I agree with you, OP I remember when Ellen Degeneres came out- I was a teen at the time and loved to sneak late night tv when I was supposed to be in bed- Jon Stewart was guest hosting for Tom Snyder on "The Late Late Show". Anyway, he did this whole bit about how silly it was that Degeneres felt the need to make an announcement that she was out and how it wasn't a big deal and everyone knew and the media was ridiculous for following this non-story. Like clockwork, two nights later he apologizes because the Southern Baptists group called for a boycott of Disney as a result of her coming out.
I know this isn't exactly your line of reasoning, but I think it is another angle on how and why it is a big deal to come out.
That is a good point r2. Thank you.
[quote] People don't get it. Coming Out is not about who "knows" already or not. It's about affirming oneself. It's the confirmation of the fact that there's NOTHING wrong with being gay and being open about your perfectly human concerns in life.
OP, you didn't have to explain. We already KNOW that!
Almost every gay person has been through that cycle with their straight acquaintances. You mention so-and-so celebrity is in the closet and get barraged with denial -- "He/she's married with kids! They're obviously straight! You just wish EVERYBODY was gay!" -- then that celebrity comes out, and the same people react with, "Oh, that's old news! I knew all about her YEARS ago! EVERYBODY knew that!"
It's the process they have to go through. Don't take it to heart.
"Oh my God. I'm back. I'm home. All the time, it was... We finally really did it ... You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!"
We are switching to the new platform for The DataLounge this weekend. All of our mobile users have been using it for over a week and all first time users have been using it for about a month - which adds up to well over one million users. So we're ready to end this phase of the testing and move everybody to the new site. (more)
And yes, we've changed the look and some of how it operates.
Yes, we know you just *hate* it in well in advance.
Yes, we know we suck.
Yes, we are the biggest suckers that ever sucked.
But it was time for a change and with the huge shift to mobile it was long overdue. We've taken this opportunity not only to update the look but also make major changes under the hood (or "bonnet" if you're either British or pretentious or both). And we have to prepare for 2016 - a presidential election year where we can normally expect to see a 60% jump in traffic (yes, we've seen 5 presidential elections so far…Christ we're old).
The site has a bunch - nay, plethora - of new features which will make the site more usable: better search, the ability to ignore posters and threads, see link previews, to pick up a thread where you left off, spam and malware filtering and more.
If you want you can go explore and see for yourself, Click here.
And while running the tests we've noticed two interesting reactions to the new system - people are spending more time on the site and more people that come stay around longer and look at more stuff. Both good things. Yay!
Possibly we've not slain all the dragons and there will be issues that come up during the switchover. There's a help button in the lower right hand corner of the page which you can use to send us bug reports.
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