AnnE: The speech isn't perfect yet...it...has...to be...PERFECT!!!
Adam Shulman: I think it's perfect my princess...
AnnE: I told you not to call me that, you cunt.
What if I have to poop? I can't leave the audience. They all will be watching me constantly, and they'll know I left to poop!
Isidro, please line my Mouawad's handbag - the 1001 Nights Diamond one - with plastic for tomorrow.
Adam, how is this for a surprised face? How about this then? Or this? Okay, this?
What if I'm getting thirsty? oh, god, WHAT IF I'M GETTING THIRSTY???????? If I drink now I won't fit in my dress ... but, what if I am getting thirsty while on stage? Fuck, fuck, fuck!
She's trying to think of creative ways to work the words "bludgeon" and "juggernaut" into her acceptance speech. And other words.
She's been on a drip feed all night, her handlers thought it would be a good idea to give her a big dose of SINCERITY. It might work.
The big question is will the entire audience rise for Anne's big win or just sit there like Chris Brown at the Grammys?
She's saying to her mother, "Breasts, Mama. They're called breasts, and every woman has them."
How should I wave? Like a girl, like a shy girl, a confident girl, a surprised girl, a girly girl ???
How should I smile? Like a ...
How should I walk to the stage ? Like a ...
How should I hold the trophy ? Like a ... no, no, not like a dildo. How do you hold a dildo?
She's thinking of the Academy and saying, "It's payback time, bitches."
"I would like to dedicate this award to an old friend. We'll always have Brokeback, Heath!"
What I absolutely don't want to miss tonight is all my haters collective heads exploding when I win.
Truly a moment to savor and remember for a lifetime.
Suck it, bitches.
but my Oscar comes at night
with his voice as SOFT as thundeeer
as he deems me fit for art
as he writes my name in awe
He spent a lifetime in my mind
He filled my days with endless wonder
He took my childhood in his stride
Will he be GONE when autumn comes?
Still I dream he'll come to me
And we can live the years together
for there are dreams we can achieve
they are gold, and tall and slender...
I should thank God but I'm not black so they won't be expecting it but I know it's God's will that I win this award because he wouldn't have let me cut my hair if I should not have cut my hair and my God given singing talent is truly, unlike those other singers who win, God given, but I'm sure I AM GOD so isn't God like a supporting player to my lead but why am I in suppporting when the movie revolves around me because I am God and the One Genuine True Lead Performance in this music fuck you Hugh I mean I'd like to fuck you but you're gay right everyone says so but your wife but this is getting away from me thanking God or actually I should ask people to thank God for bringing me into this world for God so loved the world that he brought forth me to bring eternal joy. OK, that's it, I WILL thank God tonight!!
At least the Best Supp Actress award come early in the broadcast so we should be done with her fairly early on..... unless Anne lobbied the organization and producers to have her award handed out before they announce best actor.
"Should I or shouldn't I wear my muff for tonight's gala? It'll be chilly, and I certainly won't be wearing any panties."
This entire thread is the tiresome, mentally ill Anne Hathaway troll talking to itself.
I wish the troll would drop dead along with his object of obsession.
Not true R17. There are many of us. We are legion!
I'm going to mass this morning and lighting candles for Sally Fields. I am praying and praying that both Sally & Emmanuelle Riva win tonight. I want to watch AnnE and Jennifer look shocked. Mouths agape.
I want to see the faces of David O Russell and Hugh Jackman looking absolutely stunned and pissed off. Most of all, I want to see an angry AnnE run out of the auditorium followed by her puppyboy Adam, who will need medical assistance later on.
I SO want something unexpected to happen tonight. Otherwise we will be watching a shitmess. YOu watch. It will be the most vaudevillian, amateurish garbage show ever. We will embarrass ourselves before the world.
Maybe life will imitate art and she'll drop dead a quarter of the way down the aisle.
Someone mentioned Brokeback upthread, and I'd forgotten she was in it. Maybe this is her revenge. Every one of the principals in that movie was nominated for an award, Heath, Michelle Williams, Jake Gyllenhall, Ang Lee, the movie, Larry McMurtry for the screenplay, cinematography, soundtrack. It's like AnnE and Randy Quaid were the only ones ignored during awards season. Of course Crazy Randy wasn't really in it that much.
Batten down the hatches, bitches! The storm is coming tonight!
AH wasn't in it much either, r21. Ennis was the lead character, so his wife was the far bigger supporting role.
I will scream if she makes some reference to cutting her hair at some point if she wins.
You just know that she's practicing SINGING her acceptance speech..
"I dreamed a dream of one day wining...a golden man to call my oh-own..."
Does this dress go with my nose?
How can I stick it to The Flying Nun one more time?
AnnE is thinking about all the "little people" she needs to thank. And she's trying to decide whether she really needs to thank them after all, because the world will want to hear about her more than about them. It's a dilemma for her. She wants to be true to her fans. She's also worried about sharting onstage since she had some bad sushi at Nobu last night.
OK, ;'m doing it. I've been thinking about it for a week, and you're not going to talk me out of it. I'm just trying to figure out if it will mean more if I announce it on the red carpet, or if I announce it when I win.
I'm thinking red carpet. I'm thinking if I don't win, I can still upstage Sister Bertrille or whatever the fuck her name was, because everyone will be talking about me being pregnant instead of me losing the Oscar.
No one will give a fuck about the Oscar. That's how Beyonce handled it. I mean if Beyonce can do it why can't I? We can make it true later, Adam.
I am thinking about you. My gay fans. My fans who are children. My fans in Japan. My hard of hearing fans. I love all of you with every cell in my body. This moment is for us.
As much as I'd hate to jeopardize the carefully-crafted Oscar campaign my team has been executing these past few months, I simply cannot hold back much longer. Since my few detractors seem to reside on this vile website, I'm going to go off script for a bit and tell you bitches a little story:
When "The Princess Diaries" was released, I was 21. I already knew that the role I was condemned to, namely to be goofy and accessible while looking pretty, gave me the perfect opportunity to listen and observe. Not to what people told me, which naturally was of no interest, but to whatever it was they were trying to hide. I practiced detachment. I learned how to look cheerful while under the table I stuck a fork into the back of my hand. I became a virtuoso of deceit. It wasn't pleasure I was afer, it was knowledge. I consulted the bitchiest stylists to learn how to appear, PR mavens to find out what to think, and Vatican power brokers to see what I could get away with, and in the end, I distilled everything to one wonderfully simple principle: win or die.
Wouldn't it be sort of hilarious if she actually loses?
At this point, I would pay money for her to lose. But my guess is, she will weave the words "I dreamed a dream" into her acceptance speech.
I wonder if she knows what a joke she's become.
AnnE is still leafing through the Oxford English dictionary looking for those ten-dollar words to dress up her speech. She is now on her 114th draft trying to seemlessly work in 'afflatus,' 'penurious,' 'rotomontade,' and 'Stygian' so that they don't appear too obvious.
AnnE is busy warming up her vocal chords. It was recently announced on E television that she will be singing I Dreamed a Dream and Hugh will be singing "Suddenly". How special.
I wonder how many costume changes she'll have tonight. If she doesn't win she'll have to do that medley with Hudson and Zeta-Jones and both of them won Oscars for their roles and they didn't cut their hair or lose weight! Would AnnE lose it?
Anne will do a Faye Dunaway wins for Network acceptance speech.
"Thank you. I didn't expect this to happen quite yet but I do thank you."
[quote]It was recently announced on E television that she will be singing I Dreamed a Dream and Hugh will be singing "Suddenly". How special.
God I hope not.
Zeta Jones' Oscar win was hilarious. She shares the same first name with Kathy Bates so when Sean Connery just announced 'Catherine' as the winner, Kathy looked like she wanted to give him an Annie Wilkes hobbling procedure.
I wonder how AnnE intends to incorporate the lyrics into her acceptance speech.
I don't get the anne hathaway hate.
Anne Hathaway should do a Liza biopic - how I toiled being the daughter of a genius.
Anne was suppose to do GET HAPPY the Judy Garland bio. Guess it fell apart.
Tina Nina Minnelli, the other no one knows me forgotten half sister
regardless of how she comes off ( Got sick of her constant reminders that she was 'daringly nude' in that JakeG flick) Anne was pretty wonderful as Lili in Encores! production of the musical CARNIVAL. really....
Carla Alberghetti, sister of Anna Maria and star of the bus and truck company
R33 's is a masterpiece. Beautiful writing.
r48, they are quoting Glenn Close in Dangerous Liaisons. Get cultured Mary!