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Somebody stole my sneakers and dirty socks from the gym tonight.

I placed them on top of my locker before I went to shower. When I returned a few minutes later, they were gone. The maintenance guy didn't take them and they didn't show up in the lost&found at the front desk. Seriously, who would do do such a thing? It grosses me out to think that right now, some fat queen in his parents' basement choking his chicken while inhaling the odor of my filthy socks and sneaks. Seriously WTF.

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"Oh my God. I'm back. I'm home. All the time, it was... We finally really did it ... You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!"

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