Kate Middleton: 'A plastic princess born to breed'
Bestselling 'Bring up the Bodies' author Hilary Mantel's venomous attack on Kate Middleton
Hilary Mantel calls Duchess of Cambridge 'bland' and 'machine made'
Said impression of future queen was 'jointed doll on which rags are hung'
go to link and check out who's casting the first stone...
I love when Brits try to tell us the stereotype of their having absolutely hideous teeth is untrue or out of date. Just one look at Hilary Mantel's grotesque chompers proves it remains eternally valid.
Just look at those things!
Mantel looks like an ur-zombie. Still, she makes a couple of good points about Middleton.
The Daily Fail's war against women by women continues. In the vein of Samantha Brick and that Liz something or the other woman who has a regular column.
Bland is better than crazy.
I love Hilary Mantel as a novelist, but her pointless bitchery is also brilliant!
Kate IS bland. I'm sure she'll be a perfectly fine Princess of Wales and then Queen consort one day, but she has no real style and nothing about her grabs the heart. Diana might have had a few emotional screws loose, but she really was a figure everyone felt they knew and loved.
She lacks the vulnerability of Diana which was a part of her charm. Diana's wounded little bird persona helped endear her greatly to the public.
Check out the British skank author's toofus. Yellow and wonky. There is nothing brilliant about her or her writing.
However, the Brits will think she is a hot and sexy stunner!
The Royals tend to forget that they are now nothing more than very highly paid government employees who were hired to PERFORM for the entertainment of the people of the UK and to attract tourists to the Isles.
They cannot just sit there and look pretty. They must entertain us with grandeur and scandal or else, what's the fucking point???
Yes, she's got butter teeth, but who cares? She's hilarious, and quite right.
How long before the infidelity scandals start to emerge? I give it till after the second child is born. That's when it all went downhill for Charles and Diana. Maybe William will have more sensitivity in the marriage, seeing how Charles humiliated his mother, but I believe Kate will start to get "the itch". She's been dating this man since she was a freshman in college. She'll start to wander...
Somebody's not going to be on the birthday honors list.
The one good thing that can be said about Kate is that she will inject some much needed attractiveness genes into that family tree. Her husband already looks like a bargain basement version of prince Albert of Monaco. Even in the pre-marriage Vanity Fair articles, which were invariably puff pieces for the royal family, she came across as a rather vapid party girl who got extremely lucky.
Hilary Mantel is hotter than Susan Boil. Fuckhin yea! Wheave got the hottest birds, mates. They smart too.
British pussy hound
Kate staked William.
As far as British women are concerned, Hilary is a STUNNER.
Of course a novelist would find Diana more interesting. I like Kate, but she's well-balanced, like a high school homecoming queen. Nothing much to write about. Not someone whose "human awkwardness and emotional incontinence showed in her every gesture," as Mantel says of Diana.
[quote]Kate staked William.
Through the heart?
Didn't Kate just wait and wait and wait and wait until he proposed? On the other hand, he's no prize either.
[quote]he's no prize either
Other than being in line to the throne of England, you mean?
[quote]The one good thing that can be said about Kate is that she will inject some much needed attractiveness genes into that family tree.
I tried. Those Windsor genes are a bitch.
"Other than being in line to the throne of England, you mean?"
Well, he's in his 20s and balding and not the most good looking of men.
[quote]not the most good looking
I'm rarely one to give the unwashed American masses credit, but they definitely smell a rat in this one. Or at least a plastic princess.
Despite a non-stop, multichannel media blitz, the American public couldn't give a shit about Kate Middleton. She is simply not interesting to them. She doesn't sell magazines, or clothes, or TV programming the way many had hoped. She is not the second coming of Diana, or anything close. PEOPLE needs to stop putting her on covers. American consumers simply do not care.
It's so strange to think that when Diana was Kate's age, she only had five years left to live.
I'm no great Mantel fan, but I thought her take on Middleton, though not really positive, was a lot more articulate than the Daily Mail piece suggests. Apart from the snorting and sniffling, she was very informative about "the royal body" in Brit history (from the Tudors on, and especially Wally, Di and Middleton) at theLondon Review of Books lecture, which is where the whole brouhaha started. Link below.
[quote]she will inject some much needed attractiveness genes
Yes. The Hanovarian chin will now have no upper lip. What more could one want
Trouble is, she's far too middle class and normal. She needs some madness to make her interesting to the media and the masses - which these days are one and the same. Even the most stoic and grandest consort in living memory, Queen Mary, had a touch of fabulous eccentricity.
When Diana was Kate's age, she was doing things that mattered: taking her sons to soup kitches to show society's poor, meeting with AIDS patients, trying to rid the world of land mines.
What has Kate done--or what has she even shown any interest in doing someday? Nothing. Diana and Sarah Ferguson were go-getters, compassionate, involved and looking out for others beyond themselves. Plus, they had personalities.
Kate Middleton is not just bland; she seems disinterested in others and lacks any endearing quality.
Why, OP, should I go to a newspaper that hates gay people and always has had?
Why should I go and scoff at a woman who is an accomplished novelist and pretty damn funny as well?
What else is Kate supposed to do? The British monarchy doesn't have any political power anymore, so her comparisons are futile. If her problem is with the useless figurehead royals, take it out on them, not Kate.
I hate the post-modern feministization of Anne Boleyn. She was the puppet of her father and the other Protestants, and cared more about looking pretty at court than having political sway. She was a Reformation-era Real Housewife, not a Hillary Clinton.
Enough about Kate, did anyone ever find the rest of the pics from Prince Harry's pnp night in Vegas?
[quote]What else is Kate supposed to do?
R32. How about getting involved in some high profile charities like her mother-in-law, Diana did? And not just showing up at the local hospital. "The People's Princess" wasn't just an empty name tag for Diana, she actually did things that made a difference. Diana was involved in causes on a worldwide scale.
And here lies the problem. Americans were deluded by Diana's look-at-me self-serving antics into believing royalty are celebrities. But they are not. They are part of the State. And to make them otherwise is corrosive to the institution. Princess Anne does more than Diana ever did. A million million times more. But she'll only get her thanks at her eulogy -- not in Vanity Fair and Vogue.
And that's just as it should be.
Gawd, here we go again - Windsor shill (and anti-Di militant) at r35!!
People saying that "Kate doesn't matter to Americans" is wrong. Every single frau on fb loves her. Every single one.
And that is fine actually. I like her a lot too.
There's theres the people on this thread saying that she should do more "for charity".
Um, does charity actually make a difference in anyone's life? Ans: NO.
Charity is just famewhoring.
[quote]Charity is just famewhoring.
Wrong. Charity work is quite worthwhile especially when it's a royalty participating. Famewhoring is what the Kardashians do--with no effort at all to help others despite their obscene wealth.
We call charity philanthropy now.
Remember when little Michael J. Fox was Mr. Golden Globe they introduced him as Philanthropist and Actor Sam Fox.
r38 sorry what?
Angelina & Brad have brought SHAME to everything "charity" and "foundation".
All charities are scams & used by famewhoring celebs.
WTF 'emotional incontinence'?
What a bitch
Does anyone remember
MySixInTheCity's husband was making quite a bit from that "charity" which paid people, esp the founder an enormous amt.
We posted a lot about what a fake charity it was (but that's easy, all charities are fake) & suddently her husband Rob and her went to SD to "help her sister".
All charities are fake.
R42, do you speak English?
How about the Make It Right Foundation, the one where Brad Pitt's supposedly raised zillions and given zillions in a foundation write off.
Yeah Katrina was a long time ago and MIR is charging poor black people $150k for homes that in that area go for about $30k.
What a scam, and a tax write off! Oh and Pitt's faux foundation has done about 12 houses in all this time since Katrina - but that is almost all charities. All are scams. And foundations - scams.
The Brangelina Troll doesn't get that gay men don't care about them or the Brangeloonies that post incessantly on Just Jared and Female First. Stop injecting your Angelina Jolie obsession here hoping to get a reaction.
As time goes by it'll be William who'll get bored soonest by the burden of his royal superego.
Despite his (understandable) Head Prefect demeanour, some wild will eventually out. His parents weren't angels, and Harry puts it about.
William will naturally play away, as probably will Kate. They're only human.
Mantel should stick to writing fascinating historical novels about the royals when they mattered.
And forget being a contemporary critic of the Royals in an age when they don't.
This snarking is beneath both her and Kate.
[quote] a woman who is an accomplished novelist and pretty damn funny as well
Why should we care about that r31. She is not pretty and has bad teeth, surely that is more important. And that is why Kate is our perfect Princess.
I saw footage of Kate today on TV and she doesn't even look like she's a healthy weight let alone pregnant. Her child is not going to thrive in her diminutive womb.
R40 perhaps you should have used a better example. Madonna for instance is a proven fraud none of the money she promised to Malawi produced a thing. Whatever her motives are Angelina has a nearly spotless reputation within the charity world. Brad Pitt has done a ton for NOLA. They may be doing the whole thing for self promotion but the end result is good works. Most of the criticism lobbied at them concerns their massive egos and holier than thou behavior.
The text of Hillary Mantel's remarks (thanks to R28 for the link) is fascinating.
Thanks, r35, the voice of reason. Just a quibble: t's true and lofty to refer to the Royals as part of "the State", however, their existence also boils down to cold, hard economic reality: their status never will be abolished as long as they generate millions in tourism revenue. Let's see how much the UK wants to fund them if their costs start to outweigh the benefits.
Like others here, I take it as a given that Willam and Kate both will take on other lovers together (threesomes) and seperately. If one takes nothing else away from even a mere glance at the history of the UK Royals, it's that monogamy isn't held to be a virtue. It's downright common to be hung-up on that monogamy thing.
Kate is bland. Still, her presence by William's side gives him some much needed sparkle because,let's face it,he has all the charisma of continental drift.
This thread is really a good example of what Martel was describing in her address. The public's obsession with royal looks reduces Kate to nothing more than what she wears.
Agree with R49. I don't perceive a woman with an eating disorder as being "born to breed," and I felt the same way about Princess Diane.
If a man is genuinely looking for good breeding stock, one of the first things on his list would be physical and emotional health. Women with eating disorders are not healthy on any level.
"Agree with [R49]. I don't perceive a woman with an eating disorder as being 'born to breed,' and I felt the same way about Princess Diane."
r54 = Mary Wilson
R55 still has his head stuck up Di's butt that's bonier than ever.
Prince William should have married Brittney Spears when he had the chance. That would have been fun!
[quote]All charities are scams & used by famewhoring celebs.
I'll get on the phone right away to tell my local food bank and AIDS service orgs. I'll be sure to tell them poster R40 on the Kate Middleton thread said so.
Someone please alert the Red Cross, they should know, too. Stop giving to charity, R40 says they're all scams.
The Red Cross is very scammy, R58.
I volunteer at a local food bank and at Healthcare for the Homeless where I actually see people being helped.
I have no use for most charities that exist for their own purposes that are rarely about helping those in need.
I'll be sure to tell them R59 said they're "scammy"!
They've heard it before, R60.
Caftan, onion rings.
William HAD to marry a dullard who is "bord to breed".
Any woman with intelligence, ambition, or individuality would be driven crazy by the lifetime of boredom set out for her. Look at the Crown Princess of Japan, having breakdowns and refusing to bear a son. can't have that.
[quote] Look at the Crown Princess of Japan, having breakdowns and refusing to bear a son. can't have that.
Henry VIII had this problem, too, as all of his wives absolutely refused to bear male heirs. Too bad they didn't have the benefit of modern science like you do to understand how gender selection works during reproduction.
[quote] Any woman with intelligence, ambition, or individuality would be driven crazy by the lifetime of boredom set out for her. Look at the Crown Princess of Japan, having breakdowns and refusing to bear a son. can't have that.
I was just thinking about that reading this thread. Do you really think that Royal vetters would approve of someone intelligent, educated, accomplished in her own right, opinionated or politically active as a potential spouse? The ideal candidate is a woman with no personality to speak of who can be trained like a monkey to behave properly in public and obey the state visit protocol when the couple visits some place like Fiji. Of course, he needs to be fertile and if she happens to look good and photographs well in designer frocks, it's a bonus.
*she* needs to be fertile.
Ah, yes - and every Amrican woman is a vision of even-tempered sanity and beauty...
[quote]did anyone ever find the rest of the pics from Prince Harry's pnp night in Vegas?
What does pnp mean?
And apparently some chick is writing a book about her experiences with Harry in Vegas.
R64, Crown Princess Masako of Japan has borne a daughter to a royal family whose inheritance goes only through the male line, and has reportedly refused to go through with another pregnancy. With modern reproductive technology being what it is, you bet your ass that if she had another child at her age, it'd be male!
Her sister-in-law reportedly had IVF, to insure that there was a male child around.
I don't get the issue with Masako's daughter succeeding to the Japanese throne. There is a precedent for sovereign empresses in Japan, six of them, in fact. I feel bad for Masako, the Imperial Household Agency is said to be very intrusive in the lives of the Imperial Family. Empress Michiko had a breakdown herself, early in her marriage.
She definitely is no Princess Diana but, then again there will never be another Diana.
Kate's a boring old cunt with the personality of a rock. Her lazy ass better stay boney since she only has enough energy to be a clothes WHOREse.
It's 2013; "princesses" and "kings" are an antiquated concept. Get rid of the whole lot.
Hilary should take a look in the mirror before criticising someone else's looks. She definitely comes from some alien world as British women are the most beautiful on planet earth and have the most perfect teeth.
We've had "KATE'S BULGE" pictures all week in the UK.
As my dear lady mother said - "I've farted bigger"