Romance is dead

None of the guys I regularly chat and trade pics with on Manhunt, Grindr, Scruff, or Squirt sent me Valentine's greetings today. Can you believe that? I show someone my butthole, and a pic of my cock leaking precum and I don't get so much as a "Hey bud! Happy V Day" ??? Men!

• I can't even get the cat to let me pet him. Stupid cat.

• You have to present to them as VD day rather than V day. Then you will get answers.

• You should have presented your hole with a heart drawn around it.

• My married bud gave me the usual morning load, but his balls smelled like pussy. Ugh.

• THE NERVE!!!!!!!!!!!

• Hey bud. Happy V Day.