The Galloping Gourmet here, posting about a holiday dinner I'm throwing tonight
HELLO! GG here. I've been gone for awhile because i am in the throes of a new romance. I haven't been so happy and carefree in a long time. We're throwing our first dinner party as a couple tonight and inviting ten people!! AH! So much fun.
I am doing a dim-sum themed menu complete with carts and bamboo cartons. Here are my choices:
*barbecue pork buns
*clams in black bean sauce
*shrimp noodle in XO sauce
*faux sharkfin dumplings
*baby bok choy
*broccoli in scallion sauce
Dips: soy (regular and low-sodium), sriracha, hot chili oil, xo sauce and fish sauce.
To drink: Jasmine tea, bubble tea, and lemon water!!
AHHH!H I am so ready for this night to begin!!
Jesus, are you 'entertaining' or trying to make people throw up?! Good Lord! Tone it down a little, why dontcha? Overcompensating much? Trying waaa-aaaaaay too hard. Pass the Tums, for Chrisssake!
You're having fun,aren't you, Galgo?
The Galloping Gourmet's meals are like Patrick Bateman's outfits in the book American Psycho.
"I'm allergic to shellfish. Do you mind if I just order some pizzas?"
I thought we got rid of you.
Have you notified the local paramedics to be on call yet?
Let's see how many tards take this thread seriously and actually believe this person throws dinner parties for anything other than his beanie baby collection.
Are you going to have a cute little basket full of EpiPens? Better think ahead.
When you serve from the dim sum cart, be sure to wear your most elegant and colorful cheongsam, and do your hair up in a bun with two chopsticks sticking from it.
Why are people being so mean to GG?
Why so much seafood, GG?
GG is an institution. Respect his love of cock, listen to his insecurities, and revel in the profundity of his menus.
Is there a McDonald's nearby ?
This bitch is the new Noodles but it arrives on a cart instead of shifty-eyed in an ABS.
Hon, you're ovah. Get a new schtick.
Wait. I thought he was madly in love not two months ago. Could the GG be that Palm Springs old queen photographer who's always finding new soulmates?
I'll just have a Tab.
I can only imagine the tragedy that will ensue when OP drunkenly attempts "Un bel di, vedremo" after tripping on her beloved Lhasa Apsos and all the floaty curtains ignite.
Sorry OP, this would be the holiday dinner I'm throwing up.
Where is the cream of sum yung guy?
It's going to be a disaster without booze.
Who is the new boytoy GG?
I'm kind of growing to like GG. He's a troll that doesn't go all psycho!
Holy Fuck I Hate You
I don't get the point of recreating a restaurant meal at home - unless you used to work in a dim sum kitchen (and there's a reasonable hope itbwill taste like dim sum.
If you want dim sum, why not go out for dim sum.
This us as cinfusing to me the people who get pizza stones and then insist on making their own pizza at home.
What a liar! I doubt the Galloping
Gourmet knows how to make any of these dishes.
He probably doesn't even know how to boil water.
OP, can I come to your party? I'm rather fetching and who knows you might drop your boy toy for me.
Just make sure you have a Sandra Lee-like tablescape, stick a pair of chopsticks up your nose, overcook all of the seafood and I'm sure your party will be a roaring success.
Anyone remember the Frugal Gourmet on TV? Whatever happened to him?
You and your guest are one in the same. Get better at this.
If I was invited to a party that was the menu, I would have to excuse my self after every course to hit the bathroom.
If there is any truth to the OP actually trying to cook. Girl, that menu is too specific to your tastes. I hope you know, some people don't like Asian food at all.
r30 Jeffrey L. Smith (January 22, 1939 – July 7, 2004) was the author of a dozen best-selling cookbooks and the host of The Frugal Gourmet
In 1997 seven men filed suit against Smith alleging that he sexually abused them when they were teens. Six of the plaintiffs alleged that the abuse occurred in the 1970s while they were working for Smith at the Chaplain's Pantry; the seventh plaintiff alleged that he was sexually assaulted in 1992 at age 15 while hitchhiking. Smith denied the accusations but his alleged actions had been the subject of much talk around the city of Tacoma for years. Smith was never charged with a crime but in 1998 he and his insurance company settled with the plaintiffs out of court a few days before the trial was to occur.
Much more interested in GG's new romance. Just how did this loon find a man?
I would like a photo of the dinner party, please. Faces can be blurred out. Otherwise I think this is bullshit.
I know damned well that IF this dinner party took place SOMEONE took a pic with their phone.
Now ANTE UP!
Thank you and god bless. :)
[quote]Otherwise I think this is bullshit.
GEE, do ya THINK?!?
I don't get it, why is everyone so mean to the GG? It's not like he's being unpleasant or malicious.
Dear Galloping Gourmet:
While your guests are smoking pot and eating your exotic food, I hope you've chosen good pornos to show on your 50-inch flatscreen TV!
Too much starch in this menu. Too many dumplings and buns. Not enough interesting vegetables. Try lotus root, bamboo shoots, black mushrooms, long beans, or snow peas.
[quote] Not enough interesting vegetables
GG doesn't do vegetables!
Several weeks ago, he made lobster bisque and chocolate mousse and brought it to a shelter for storm victims. Three people ended up in the ER. The rest had milder symptoms. It was the cream he used that went bad during a power outtage.
It was the final entry on this menu that convinced me GG is an EST: congee.
Did you read about Dim Sum in W, Tess?
Is this the same person that served an appetizer that included pita bread with a main course of goulash? Where was this dude when one of our lesbian posters was planning the infamous potluck wedding?
You are one of the weirdest trolls ever, OP.
R37, he's not a nasty troll, but he's a frequent offender and never really varies his routine. He's also self-named (and not very original about it), so he's trolling at a different level by trying to create a "persona" and pretending anyone cares.
It's always the same schtick: insanely upbeat about touting his latest "menu", which is always some vaguely OCD listing of complicated and/or exotic dishes that exist within the same cuisine niche but don't really work together. He'll list 4 starchy side dishes for example. Or 5 courses where any one of them would work as the main course. Or a recent thanksgiving post where he was serving 5 different pies for dessert but nothing else (hope you like pie! A LOT!). It's always foods that are a bit...much, especially in relation to each other. It's like he's trying to impress us with these extravagant dishes, but failing to recognize that it's all too heavy, fussy and similar, all at once.
It's very weird and clearly designed to provoke head-scratching responses. Like the idea of serving a starch-and-seafood heavy dim sum menu at home, carts included. No one does this and anyone who designs a menu with 2 different shrimp dishes, starch galore and cheesy props like dim sum carts (but little in the way of culinary balance or variety) is clearly a bit...odd. To do this repeatedly when the same tired criticisms I've listed ALWAYS follow is clearly the mark of a troll.
I can't wait to smear this all over the Disney store.
Excuse me, 3 shrimp dishes.
Die you fat cow
I thought you were dead but Wikipedia says you aren't.
How the hell are you doing? Still digging the wine, I imagine.
[quote]i am in the throes of a new romance.
This was begun in December. That's four or five new romances ago.
Fascinating menu. Sure to get plenty of raves.
What happened to that Underground banquet you were putting together? Do you have a new beau?