More proof that the French Canadians are batshit crazy If a proposed law in Montreal goes into effect, all dogs in the Canadian city will need to understand commands in both English and French. Montreal city councilor Benoit LaDouce, who made the proposal, told CBC Radio that it's necessary to counter the "chaos" resulting from dogs at public parks who understand commands in only one language. "The current situation in Montreal Dog Park is untenable chaos," LaDouce told CBC Radio. "The various dog commands are incomprehensible to each other." In an inadvertently hilarious interview with the station, LaDouce (who was deadly serious) says he was inspired to propose the law after a dog began licking his face and did not respond to French commands. "Our alienation from each other was absolute," LaDouce said. LaDouce wants all dogs in the city to learn at least 80 to 90 commands in both languages, calling the task "basic stuff." He said each canine should be subjected to a test by a city employee to confirm the animal's bilingual comprehension. While few question that dogs are capable of intelligent acts—just recently, we learned about some dogs that are being taught to "drive" cars—LaDouce's solution may not even be possible. Trained dogs are only able to learn about 160 words, according to Animal Planet. And what of the dog owners who are not bilingual? As CBC Radio host Pat Kelly points out, having to learn a second language only to impart a few dozen commands to your pet would be an expensive and time-consuming exercise. For example, only about 20 percent of people in the U.S. are able to hold a conversation in a second language, according to the U.S. Census. "Expensive or opportunity, which way do you want to look at it?" LaDouce said in response. "Now, suddenly, just by having a dog, I'm opening up to different kinds of knowledge." He said he hopes to get the law passed and put into effect by summer 2013. "I'm working on it day and night," he said.
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