Chocolate stains on white wool upholstery

How do I get them out?

• Continue claiming the stains are "chocolate" and maybe a legitimate company will actually agree to steam clean your furniture.

• A little club soda will get that out.

  LIAR!

• I love you, R2!

  http://www.metacafe.com/watch/hl-40020792/saturday_night_live_compulsion_season_13/

• Try preventing them in the future with Depends®. No idea how to get existing "chocolate" stains out other than hiring a professional cleaner.

• Oh, my! *clutching my pearls*

  June%20Cleaver

• Note to self: avoid white wool upholstery where "chocolate" mishaps are likely to occur.

• Isn't it ironic how steam cleaning is the only effective means for getting rid of the aftermath of a Cleveland steamer?

• Oh please, you wiped your booty with the white wool.

  Jennifer%20Lawrence

• Try telling your tricks to wipe first.

• Bleach.

• MILK. Milk gets chocolate out. YOU'RE WELCOME.

• Use a towel next time you're drunk and reach for your "Man Cannon Dildonic Vibrator with the Puree Attachment."

• It does?

• You spelled feces wrong.

  Stool

• white wool furniture?? Wouldn't that be awfully itchy?

  urf

• Corn? When did I eat corn?!

  CC

• Are you sure it's chocolate?

  Shitty%20Little%20Ann

• From eHow 1) Buy a wool upholstery 2) Put chocolate on it. 3) Get some stain remover 4) Apply stain remover 5) Ask a friend to help