What are your experiences? I'd like a male, with strong hands and a soothing voice. Are the ones on sites like masseurfinder.com just prostitutes? I was thinking of going to a more reputable establishment.
Is making noise considered acceptable during a massage? Like "Ohhhh that's so gooood!!," etc. Are they shy about massaging your ass? I'm not looking for sex, but I do want to feel warm, manly hands all over my body.
It's difficult to find a registered therapist who will give you a happy ending. I gather, privately, they find it annoying when people moan and writhe on the table as it's not sex, it's a massage and if it gets too much a professional will ask you to dial in down in a polite way 'is the pressure too much?" 'if you could remain still, it will help me work the deeper muscles". They do massage your ass generally but again, a good one isn't digging a mine shaft.
Maybe I overstate difficult. I read virtually every gay but professional massage therapist gets asked for a happy ending and about 50% are game for it.
My therapist is straight and I will occasionally say something like "that's great" if he's working a spot I need worked. But only once in a session and that's it. He has a deep sexy voice and will just respond quietly and say "good." Then back to silence.
[quote]My therapist is straight and I will occasionally say something like "that's great" if he's working a spot I need worked.
Same with my masseur. I like it to be quiet most of the time, but he probably speaks more than I do in a session... "This muscle is super-tight, just breathe deep for a minute," that sort of thing.
Experience suggests that legit male MTs are more willing to provide "extras" for repeat clients. A first-time client who is all hands and boner is seen as an asshole. However, repeat business let's you get comfortable with each other, and I've found surprising erotic possibilities in guys I've already seen 5 or 6 times, although it still has to be respectful of boundaries. If you want all-out sex, hire a hooker, and pay him for it.
"Maybe I overstate difficult. I read virtually every gay but professional massage therapist gets asked for a happy ending and about 50% are game for it."
A "professional massage therapist" who includes sex during a session has crossed the line into prostitution.
I've had many massages (I get them for relaxation and to help with back pain). I have had many massage therapists and I always asked them if they've had clients who request sex during a session. ALL of them said they had and all of them said they would never do it because if they did could lose their license and could be prosecuted for prostitution. All of my massage therapists have been very ethical and professional.
The stories they tell are amusing. Female massage therapists are especially prone to sexual advances by male clients. One told me a story of how a guy asked her to masssage his stomach, which she did. He then cried "lower, lower!" That was the end of the massage. Another female who specialized in reflexology (foot massage) said that when she started massaging this one guy's feet he started squeezing his crotch! She told him to get out.
If you want a "happy ending" or blow job at the end of your massage session, rent a male or female hooker. That's THEIR job.
[quote] Is making noise considered acceptable during a massage? Like "Ohhhh that's so gooood!!," etc
I live in an Army town. I have advertised on CL that I do amateur no fee massages. I am actually pretty good at it. The clients run the gamut, mostly young to middle age. I have a room set up that looks professional for the purpose of massage though only a bedroom. I have towels and oils and the like laid out. In the adjacent room I ask them to undress and tell them I will be waiting for them.
Often they ask if I want them to take everything off, I say yes. They shyly enter the massage area, the bed is ready, I ask them to lay down on their belly.
I start with the shoulders, upper arms and neck. Slowly working my way down the back and side, arms and hands also. Then I move to the feet and legs working my way up to the buttocks.
The buttocks gets a good work out and soon my fingers trace up and down the ass crack, slipping under to the perineum and finally a direct brushing of the anus. When you slip your hand under to tweak the perineum you can detect an erection if there is one.
Next I ask them to turn over. Once again I start on the shoulders, upper arms and chest, then down to the legs back up to the crotch. Eventually of course the cock and balls are involved and none have ever refused the blow job.
I sometimes offer a prostate massage. These are not your usual gay guys, mostly married, a little uptight and DELICIOUS.
I have regulars who call when they want a repeat.
I current favorite is a retired Army guy,early 40's, tall, looks like a young Clint Eastwood. He is not hung very large but that never matters to me. His body is beautiful. He starts a distinct moaning the instant I touch him and he moans loudly through out. He allows me and seems to really get off on my finger in his anus. He usually wants to briefly handle my penis. When he first started coming for massage he was so shy , told me he was nervous. I am good with nervous people and it only endeared me to him.
When I get to sucking his cock and balls you would not believe how he reacts. Moaning and writhing and he so physically intense encourages me verbally and physically and I hope the neighbors don't hear. His orgasm is beyond intense.
Seems to me perhaps he is not very sexually experienced and is always so grateful.
His vulnerability and shyness just blow me away with tender feeling for him
Maybe I am just a sicko or something, I don't care though.
My best friend is a female massage therapist. She is a new age medicine healing kind of therapist with endless education. She know everything and receives medical referrals.
She never plays or ever would.
One story was about a stunning black man that came for a massage. He sort of showed off when he got naked. She gave him her usual professional massage and when he was finished on his back his big erection is hard to ignore. He suggested more and she just smiled, covered him with a towel, telling him she would be unable to do that and left the room. He cam out and paid leaving a big tip and that was it. he even returned to her place of employment another day and used another therapist who had the same experience.
It's always best if the party feeling the most conflict and guilt comes last.
Again, I'm not looking for sex. Just a sensual massage. Definitely no touching of genitalia, and I'm certainly not looking for the masseur to finger-fuck me.
Good to know that MTs don't go for lots of moaning. It might be difficult to contain it, and if I was self-conscious about it, I think that would make it hard to relax. It would be nice to find a masseur who wasn't a total prisspot about it.
OP if you're self conscious about it just tell the masseur ahead of time that you might moan here and there but you don't mean anything by it.
I saw this one scene from a Michael Lucas dvd called Encounters 4 or something like that and it was so hot when the cute young massage therapist began stroking his hunky Latino client who came in wearing a suit.
Why are these massage therapists so damn uptight? Wouldn't they just get a better tip and more repeat business?
Can someone please make this into a thread? It's hilarious DL gold, the jokes will just write themselves, people:
South African arrested with 'nephew's genitals in his wallet'
R9, what a very imaginative Extremely Sexy Tale, you might have a future in online erotic literature!
R9, that's hot
I get a massage at least once a week. Never had a 'happy ending' or been offered one (maybe I'm not attractive enough). The Asian MTs that I've been to all seem to enjoy talking, which I hate.
[quote]Why are these massage therapists so damn uptight?
Because they would be breaking the law and risk having their license revoked.
Which is why legit pros won't do it.
R18 No tale, the truth. I keep a calendar of dates and clients. My Army town is less than 50 thousand and an hour and a half from civilization.
I was in the Navy and many of the military play.
What I offer is something one can indulge in without overtly seeking gay sex. I am an older guy, they understand I am discreet, non threatening and like I said I can put people to ease. Been here more than 20 years, nen I have loved with, come and go. Been seeing one guy for more than 20 years. He leaves and comes back. He retired here and saw him most weeks. He moved to Vermont with his wife a few years ago but still comes back to see his daughter every year.
I think there are massage therapists who wouldn't mind a client groaning in pleasure as sex was not involved. Massages, even ones without happy endings, do feel really good.
I get massages pretty regularly, and I have some regulars in the places I travel. Massagem4m and masseurfinder are pretty accurate. Erotic means at the minimum a handjob - if you get on with the therapist more may be on offer. Sensual is harder to discern, though most will let you get off or help you. Therapeutic means nothing erotic. Pretty simple. Ask if you are concerned one way or another. All the guys I've had on these sites do good massage. Read their reviews - they are pretty accurate.
I'm an LMT. If any "massage therapist" or "masseur" ever complies with a request for sex or genital contact, they do not deserve to be in the profession. Furthermore, they shouldn't have bothered going to school.
If you want any sexually-connoted treatment, then intentionally get an illegal massage or spa service.
r9/r22 is not a massage therapist, he's a horny guy near a military base who gets sex partners through craigslist using the pretense of a 'massage' so closeted guys won't have to face the truth about who they are.
Not that I'm judging, my point is that his scenario has nothing to do with what a real masseur provides.
If R9/22 really does advertise himself ANYWHERE as an "amateur massage therapist," he could face some dire legal consequences. Adding the word "amateur" does not make it okay, and it is very foolish to divulge what he just did.
r27, but it's free. He is not charging so what consequences. As long as he stops if someone objects to his advances I don't see anything wrong with it, except he's a bit of a whore.
R28, No. Massage therapy laws are different. In most states, you actually MUST pay, and the massage must be strictly professional. The state statutes should also specifically cover who can call themselves a massage therapist, amateur or otherwise (which applies to all residents). Massage, as defined and regulated by states, usually has medical implications that are taken seriously.
In New York state, Licensed Massage Therapists aren't even supposed to massage their spouses or family members without some form of payment, and it's also supposed to be nonsexual and professionally performed and timed. Most ignore that one, but it's a technicality written into the law. However, the therapist and his/her loved one obviously aren't going to run around advertising that they do "semi-professional" massage sessions.
You see a bunch of illegal "parlors" or massage and spa services around the country, but believe me--they do get systematically busted. Furthermore, I know that in New York, whenever authorities just feel like cracking down on something, they have been known to slap fines on ridiculous technicalities regarding advertising, etc. Oh, and if a client should lie and get the idea to sue an LMT for "inappropriate touching" and the like, there's a good chance they'll win, or the LMT will be suspended. The job isn't without risk, and those who want their asses covered as much as possible will be as professional as possible.
Could I ask my massage therapist to choke me, or would this be considered rude?
"R9/R22, is not a massage therapist, he's a horny guy near a military base who gets sex partners through craigslist using the pretense of a 'massage' so closeted guys won't have to face the truth about who they are. "
Well, I'm also wondering, exactly HOW did Mr. Lives Near A Military Base, advertise for these clients before Craigsist existed?
Were his 'services' word of mouth, this EST doesn't seem real at all.
If it's true, it's all pretty pathetic and desperate!
If he's a whore, all he needs to do is pick up men in bars or wherever sex addicts troll for partners, not use the silly pretense of 'free message' to get his rocks off. I won't even get started on gay men married to women, they are another pathetic bunch!
Wow, there are way too many closeted freaks out there! Get some therapy!
I would say 9 out of 10 masseurs on places like massagem4m.com will give you a handjob. I've gone to many and almost all do. I understand the ones who object to this truth but it makes it no less true.
Speaking of whores, I once worked with a really batshit crazy female, she was a sex bomb type, she was constantly talking about her "exciting" sex life.
This was during the Xenon disco era, she was picking up different men every night while out at different dance clubs. It was a Mr. Goodbar scenario.
When she got bored with this, she tried to get off in other ways, she started getting legal messages.
She came into work one morning, boy was she disappointed that her latest sexcapade was a bust.
Her new message therapist at the time was, according to her, "a really hot Brazilian guy", she went on about "how wet and turned on" she got when he messaged her. She told us, "I wanted to fuck him on that message table, he was so fucking gorgeous, I was so wet immediately..."
Problem was, when she grabbed his hand and tried to put it on her crotch, the Brazilian guy was professional, he told he, it was NOT part of his job to sexually release his clients.
She was so insulted, this woman had an incredibly HIGH opinion of herself and her sexuality! After the therapist told her that, she immediately jumped off the table and ran to get dressed.
OF COURSE, she had to tell us, "He HAD to be gay!" We just laughed at this twit, I was celebrating the day she finally left the company. What a dumb whore.
Her sex tales became so tedious after a while. I often wonder what happened to her. She was so over-the-top desperate for any attention back then, she'd come into work with clothing three sizes too small for her!
A former work colleague told me she married a rich old man, typical. I wonder how her sex life is today, loool
Yeah, that site's for men who would 9 out of 10 times just rather be prostitutes.
That should have been: MASSAGES...
I get massages regularly - once every two weeks. I've had dozens of therapists over the years. They will all unequivocally state, "yes, PLEASE BREATHE!" breathing is essential to good massage work and many people don't and "tense" when Masseurs go deeper, basically countering their efforts. the therapists I know would then state that if moaning is natural and breath-centered then that is fine
Breathe, yes. Love to love you, Baby... not so much.
OP - If you want therapeutic massage, go to a practioner who provides therapeutic massage. If you want sexual/sensual massage, then go to a practitioner who provides that.
For the 3rd time...I am not interested in a massage that includes sexual contact. I'm not sure how I can make that any clearer.
I hope R9 never gets a shitty finger
Op, go to a spa or massage envy or something. Or, choose from the "therapeutic" choices on one of the gay sites.
OP, it's clear that most of the ugly prisspots, who would have to pay somebody in order to feel the warm touch of another person, have weighed in now.
Believe me, it's a completely different story if you're hot, with a muscular worked out body and a nice big cock. It always ends in suck and fuck.
Why would you go to a female masseuse?
Also, the U.S. is obviously very uptight about these things. Or, like I said, just depends on who you are.
Woah, Massage Envy therapists shouldn't be doing anyone any sexual favors.
OP/r40 - Well, since legit MTs wouldn't post photos, it'll be tougher to screen for the manly hands you require. But when you do - no erotic moaning. No mentions of his manly hands. And be careful how you request the ass touching.
R45, I would think that any male massage therapist would have manly hands. Also, I see MT photos posted on massage therapist websites all the time. And I'm not talking about the hooker sites.
r46 - They'd all have strong hands, if that's what you mean by manly. But they might be small, dainty strong hands.
[quote]Believe me, it's a completely different story if you're hot, with a muscular worked out body and a nice big cock. It always ends in suck and fuck.
Surely you're talking about with the illegitimates.
[quote]Also, the U.S. is obviously very uptight about these things. Or, like I said, just depends on who you are.
Then people who prefer actual sexuality during a massage should hire escorts; those who prefer to give it should become prostitutes and teach themselves massage therapy.
It's plain dumb to think that sex and medical practice are one in the same, and people who think they can swing between the two more than likely have major problems. If I want money-making clientele that is as broad as possible, including men and women (in any shape), children (mostly with autism spectrum disorders), and even infants, I will treat everyone the same. This is why massage therapy school often includes several class hours just about the psychology of boundaries.
I vastly prefer an erotic massage from a good masseur to an escort. Masseurs are generally more educated, nicer, cleaner, and I love the constant touch and intimacy, whether or not it involves more than a hand job.
Gross, those losers are the ones who pervert the profession for everyone else. What I'm saying is, sex services should be an entirely different profession. You think it should be legal? Then make separate schools with separate license programs for erotic organ manipulators.
"Also, the U.S. is obviously very uptight about these things. Or, like I said, just depends on who you are."
A flabby, pimply-assed loser with a two inch dangle who has to pay for sex: obviously that is who YOU are.
OP, some of this has already been said. But to answer your professional massage etiquette questions:
-Organic moaning is okay, though you may want to humorously inform the therapist beforehand.
-Don't talk about him or what he's doing to you, though you can say "please work on that longer, with a bit deeper pressure," etc.
-Regarding butt massage, ask for work on your GLUTES. And try not to be too picky. If it's professional, half of your butt will be draped at a time, or they will work them over through the sheet, and it will never be a full-on grope. Sometimes they actually only work the surrounding muscles, but it feels like they're touching your ass. Fascinating, I know.
-No jerking off when the massage is over and he leaves the room. Absolutely unsanitary and disrespectful (I'm not automatically assuming you would, but...)
R48, you're so boring the way you're trying to define for everybody else what massage is and you're the best because you're so uptight and can heal the sick and make the lame walk blah blah blah. But I'm sure there was a long history of massage before you got there and refusal to not only acknowledge it but also trash anybody else who isn't as uptight as you is ridiculous. I can't believe you have the ability to make anyone feel relaxed.
In the UK, there are no licenses for massage therapist, AFAIK. People can get certifications.
But why wouldn't somebody massage your genitals? They're part of your body too. And I've received plenty of brutal sports massage that ended in sex. Believe it or not, it's what men do. If two muscular, gay guys get together and rub lotion or oil on each other for an hour or so, it's likely to happen. And if you live in a prudish, sex-negative society than I guess you feel bad about it or make people feel bad about it. The rest of us just get on with our lives.
R53, We're not operating within the framework of any other culture or part of history. It's not a matter of being uptight, prudish, or sex-negative. It's a matter of preserving my integrity, as well as that of anyone who pays for legit massage training.
A person should decide what his or her boundaries are at work, and strive to apply them to everybody. As I've said, if you want a sexual service, find someone who does that professionally--great! Or find a partner who is good at massaging.
Face it: regardless of nature or history, some people feel uncomfortable rubbing, or being asked to rub, someone else's genitals. For any of many reasons. In the same way, all clients deserve the right to not wonder whether the therapist is going to get sexual with them. Shall I tell my clients with PTSD from abuse that they're just being prudish and sex-negative? The energy transfer from nonsexual massage is intense enough.
How can anyone relax with me? I think it's because I help them feel safe. Perhaps the occasional client looking for casual sex doesn't feel relaxed with me, because I don't do that. Boo hoo. Genital and breast massage do exist; many people can't handle it without thinking it's sex, and there's the off-chance that such people start to exhibit creepiness. This is why it's banned in many states (genital is usually banned; breast is by permission from client).
You think I think the body is shameful? Why would I become an LMT? Just FYI, there are forever-practiced forms of erotic massage that call for the client to resorb the orgasm internally (not actually have it). Why? Because there are many ways of achieving physical balance and/or awareness. Maybe it would behoove some people to explore relaxation without automatically relieving themselves in a way that they are so used to.
[quote]there are forever-practiced forms of erotic massage that call for the client to resorb the orgasm internally (not actually have it). Why? Because there are many ways of achieving physical balance and/or awareness.
Any proctologist will tell you that building up to orgasm but NOT ejaculating is terrible for prostate health. But you airy fairy types never want to face scientific fact.
[quote]Any proctologist will tell you that building up to orgasm but NOT ejaculating is terrible for prostate health. But you airy fairy types never want to face scientific fact.
I'm not the one who made up that method, so don't blame me. It's a fact that it has been practiced for many, many years--perhaps mostly in other cultures. By the way, other cultures have extremely different views of physiology.
I don't practice this method. I don't even "build up" any clients to orgasm. The example you are criticizing is a response to the previous poster who claimed that I'm ignoring the history of massage.
Regardless, if you think effective massage therapy must include orgasm, you're out of your mind.
become a male massage therapist. Classes in Central London