I know it's going to get judgy but fuck 'em.
I'm curious because for me I cannot get my head around the concept but I am genuinely interested in understanding, if you're in an open relationship, why you made that choice? What are the reasons or criteria or basis?
I'm not interested in beating up or measuring the value of your relationship vs. a monogamous relationship and hope you'll ignore all who do, for the purpose of building a thread that just provides some insight into this relationship style.
What do you find so hard to understand, OP? Monogamy is not the natural condition of most species (just a few birds) -- why should humans be different?
Neither are science, religion, technology or medicine natural to most species, R2
Monogamy works for some, open relationships work for some. Plenty of people are in fucked up relationships of whatever kind. Monogamous pitted against open is over simplifying it.
I would just say it's not for me...if I enter into a relationship, I'm not gonna share. I'm single and just started with guys last year (I'm 27 now) and have been approached to become fwb by a few guys in what they call open relationships...I'm just not sure how I feel about it. None of these guys would not fuck around in the presence of their partner, and some of them have told me the open relationship is "implied" rather than something they formally spoke about lol
The older you get the less it matters.
I prefer open relationships because I think most people cheat. When I really explored past relationships what bothered me about cheating wasn't that my bf was fucking someone else...it was feeling like someone had gotten the best of me and I was sitting around like a sucker instead of getting some too.
Honesty trumps sexual fidelity IMO. I don't get the idea that you're "supposed to" find ONE person and never be physically intimate with anyone else, ever.