To m lovely Bridesmaid: [Names removed to protect the brideslaves]
As you all know I picked 10 wonderful ladies to stand by my side, share and make happen my special day to Jake. Each of you individually have a reason and a special place in my heart of why I picked you to be a bridesmaid. We have set our date for Saturday, August 31, 2013 in Vail, Colorado. That seems far away but it really isn't, the earlier the planning the better. You may have already knew that my wonderful sister L— will be the Maid of Honor, she's in charge under me. Also my lovely mom will be a big help as well. L— has a big role in throwing me a bridal shower and bachelorette party, of course all of you guys do but at the end of the day shes the go to person and makes it happen.
You all have a big roll in this wedding, so before we continue I'm going to be setting some ground rules and its very important you read and think about everything through before you accept this honor to be a bridesmaid. If you guys email anything I would also like you to put L— in the CC. Not all the bridesmaid need to be CC'd unless its coming from me or L—, if it something everyone needs to see then well do it. We set the date to August 31, 2013 if that's a problem we need to know NOW. Also by the end of the week we will be setting dates for the engagement party, bridal show and bachelorette party.
Our wedding party is really the most important people at the wedding besides my self and Jake so we want every single one of our bridesmaid and grooms at our parties, I have 10 not 8 where two couldn't make it so if you already know you cant make one of the parties then we have to find someone else, not to be harsh in the slightest it would sadden me and of course you'll still be invited to our wedding, engagement ect. But it's different if your not in the wedding party and couldn't make it. We'll give everyone well advance dates for the parties and it will always fall on a weekend. The wedding as I stated will be in Vail the engagement party will either be in NY or CT and the bachelorette party will be in Vegas, cliche yeaa but I've never been.
A few girls live out of town so if there is going to be a problem with coming to either one then I need to know now because after this week I don't want to be surprised. I would like everyone to send me any dates they are going away or planning to go away after February so if your going away in January I don't care. I want any dates from February to the day of our wedding in August, that way we know not to plan something when your away. But after this week the dates are set in stone. Also if money is tight and you cant afford to contribute to say the bachelorette party or wont be able to afford a dress etc then L— and Myself don't have time to deal with that, I'm sorry. This includes flights as well, everyone knows the states where the parties are going to be held so if you wont be able to afford a flight then that means you cant make a party which ultimately means I cant have you as a bridesmaid. Obviously we'll get the best deals and were not gonna books flights for $1000 and shit that's why were doing this in advance, that goes for bridesmaids dresses as well everything will be affordable but if you think by affordable its going to be a $25 forever 21 dress then your going to the wrong wedding.
If your out of state though don't think you have to fly in for all fittings, that we will work with you, find stores in your town, get measurements..you don't have to worry about that. Also if you accept this honor another thing is that you need to be available, I'm not going to harass you with wedding stuff every hour of everyday but if its something important and it takes you a week even 2-3 days to get back to me seeeee ya! I don't have time to wait around for responses, everyone has their phone on them, it shouldn't take you more than a day to get back to me, even if your out of the country, check your email!
Furthermore, Ever since I could remember I have dreamed about this day all my life. I want to share it with the people that are most important to me. You only get one time to plan your dream wedding and I couldn't pick a more amazing group of girls to make that dream come true! So please, what's stated above think about it all and by Wednesday I need to know if everyone is 100% in, and what I have asked about sending me dates if your gonna be away between Feb-Aug ill need that on Wednesday. If you don't think you'll be able to attend one party but can make the rest of them I'm sorry but I'll have to take you out as a bridesmaid and put you as a guest. If you want to get back to me before Wednesday, that's fine. Really think about everything I've said. This is really going to be the most epic wedding ever so I hope you girls can share this special day with us!
"You all have a big roll in this wedding"
What a lot of spelling errors for someone acting so high and mighty!
Not totally unreasonable. I think she was very fair in stating the rules pretty clearly.
I was expecting a monster, but the email is very straight forward about it being one of the most important days of her life, and therefore she is being pretty firm about the dates and obligations.
And she also says that if they're not going to be in the bridal party, they're still welcome to attend the wedding.
The bride seems much more gracious than a "bridezilla," and by giving the dates and locations nearly a year in advance, she's really thinking about peoples' schedules.
On the one hand, I'm so happy to NOT be in a hetero wedding party, but on the other hand, the bride seems quite fair.
I don't see the problem here.
Oh brother …
I agree with OP that Jakey-boy has a big decision to make, and the sooner the better.
No hole is worth that shit.
I hope to god this is a joke. Mainly because I work at an event company in Colorado and I don't want this bitch hiring us.
Are you kidding R3? Demanding that they come to ALL of the parties, scattered around the country, or else? As if they don't have a fucking life. I've been a bridesmaid (hated it) twice and we only had to show up at a rehearsal dinner the night before and the wedding. Neither of my brides had bachelorette parties for which I am eternally grateful. I went to neither showers either as they were out of state.
This statement is telling.
[quote]This includes flights as well, everyone knows the states where the parties are going to be held so if you wont be able to afford a flight then that means you cant make a party which ultimately means I cant have you as a bridesmaid.
This bitch doesn't want friends attending her wedding. She wants gifts and to be the center of attention for a group of sycophant slaves.
This bitch should just be straight up. She's written, is producing, directing and starring in her own "IT'S ALL ABOUT ME!" traveling road show. Other human beings - presumably friends - are mere props, "honored" cast extras. I'd drop her crass ass in a nano second.
One wonders if she will also walk down the aisle singing like that other crazy bitch did.
I wonder how many bridesmaids she lost after this email.
I think she's being clear and stating her goals and what's she wants. All too often you deal with a bunch of passive aggressive people in these situations and they get pissed off and you're not sure why. Her bridesmaids now have enough time to back out if they wish. I would much prefer this over someone who isn't upfront.
What's clear is that she needs to back to school and study basic grammar. Yikes!
[quote]I think she's being clear and stating her goals and what's she wants.
No one's saying she's not making herself clear or being wishy-washy about what she wants, dear. She's got that part down.
bridal show? She has to seta date to drag them to a bridal show or something else?
I couldn't figure out if she was talking about a show or it was short for shower R13. Could be a show since they are popular these days.
I have a girlfriend who owns a wedding venue and her stories about brides and their meltdowns are unbelievable. She says in addition to getting the reception shit set up, dealing with unexpected rains for garden weddings, etc. she has to emotionally prop up screeching or sobbing brides. Sounds exhausting.
Just wait until she's a little older & has developed the confidence to speak up for herself....
These bridesmaids won't be gliding slowly down the aisle in dainty satin slippers at half-paces, they'll be goose-stepping.
That's got to be some platinum pussy.
R3 = Why I have absolutely no use for most women. Well, R3 and the bridezilla.
I hate, hate, hate weddings with the white intensity of a thousand suns.
With that said, this bitch is straight up cra-cra!
What if r3 is a man?
[quote]...that goes for bridesmaids dresses as well everything will be affordable but if you think by affordable its going to be a $25 forever 21 dress then your going to the wrong wedding.
Too fucking funny!
[quote]Not all the bridesmaid need to be CC'd unless its coming from me or L—, if it something everyone needs to see then well do it.
Well, we will, bitch. No need to be a cunt about it.
Where was this posted? Link?
So which one of the 10 isn't a bridesmaid anymore? Out of process of elimination, it'll be easy to root out the one who betrayed her.
It's on radar and Gawker.
This thread is useless without pictures!
She'll have a complete meltdown now--if this is real, that is.
I'm going to take a wild guess and say the groom-to-be is a wussy nice guy who never speaks up for himself, and isn't able to get sex very easily. Oh and is the only son therefore required to breed to carry on the family name.
Who has 10 bridesmaids? Someone who expects at least a few to die off before the required meetings er parties begin.
She has stated her boundaries, and is telling you NOW so she won't have to tell you THEN!
[quote]Our wedding party is really the most important people at the wedding besides my self and Jake so we want every single one of our bridesmaid and grooms at our parties, I have 10 not 8 where two couldn't make it so if you already know you cant make one of the parties then we have to find someone else, not to be harsh in the slightest it would sadden me and of course you'll still be invited to our wedding, engagement ect.
WTF, this SENTENCE doesn't make sense at all. She has 10 not 8 where 2?
I think this is good. It the gives the potential bridesmaids and easy out.
"I was SOOO looking forward to being a part of your AWESOME wedding party. But the bridal shower in Montana conflicts with a hugely important work retreat where I am a presenter. I am devastated"
I wish all declines were so easy.
The poor groom will most likely be required to give up all social life with male friends after marriage and only associate with other married couples and be required to spend every moment not at work with this crazy woman. Goes along with the thread yesterday about today's neurotic girls.
R33, If a man is going to give all that up for some pussy, blame him, not the bride.
[quote]What's clear is that she needs to back to school and study basic grammar. Yikes!
No fucking kidding. That was excruciating to read. Half way through, I gave up and started scanning.
Why do so many stupid, uneducated people have no idea how stupid and uneducated they are?
[quote]WTF, this SENTENCE doesn't make sense at all. She has 10 not 8 where 2?
All she's saying is that she wants all ten to be there at every function. She has ten bridesmaids (count them, ten) and if only eight show up at a given party or function, then she doesn't have a complete bridal party.
It's sad how women buy into this fantasy that their wedding will make them a princess for a day (or in this case, the better part of a year) when in reality, these big, overdone weddings with double-digit bridesmaids are as about as low rent as one can get.
What do you think?
Will she have a cash bar at the reception?
All signs point to YES.
This blushing bride makes Bee seem positively gracious.
Is she truly loved her family and respected her friends, she would elope.
With it going viral, do you think the true identity of the bride will be revealed?
I think the most telling thing is that she's communicating to all 10 of these women as a GROUP. They're just extras and she already has alternates. She doesn't seem to comprehend that other people have lives - life happens.
People who don't think she's a bridezilla fail to understand that THIS is just the beginning. Who would need a 22 person wedding party - especially when she's addressing them like this.
People who think she's just being fair and direct should consider there are far more meaningful ways to communicate to individuals especially when one requires a huge comittment of time - not just the events but she's clear she wants all 10 of these bitches to be ON CALL for close to a year - and money. She's not being fair. She is laying the ground rules and criteria by which she, QUEEN
BITCH - is going to judge these women.
And all for a wedding? And that's all she's dreamed of her whole life? That's disgusting. And no matter WHAT happens on the day it won't be good enough. And she's going to MILK it for up to a year after.
If I received that e-mail I'd say no thanks, I'll try and save the date for your wedding.
I mean, did anyone get how much she looked down on "the guests"? "You'll just be demoted to...guest." Imagine what she'll demand from them. What a loser.
Getting married is the most joyful and amazing experience of one's life journey. Of course she should make sure that it is up to her standards. Why are you picking on this woman?
How will she control the groomsmen?
Etiquette states that for every attendant, there should be 50 guests. That makes 400 people! Somehow, I doubt this bitch has 400 friends.
One of the potential bridesmaids should respond asking for a spreadsheet for all potential costs requesting that she, the bride, must keep to the budget otherwise she risks the potential of losing a bridesmaid later down the road. If she's going to be demanding, take her to task...
The fact that it was leaked and gone viral indicates that one of her
bridesmaids got the email and said 'Well get a load of this bitch'.
This bitch will be divorced within five years. I bet she lives in a state that bans same sex marriage rights, too. Dumb bitch.
Somehow I think this is not going to be her only wedding and she will be able to pull this crap a couple of times
Link, please, R8! I must see that!
[quote]I think the most telling thing is that she's communicating to all 10 of these women as a GROUP. They're just extras and she already has alternates.
Yup. If they really are as important to her as she claims they are, then she'd be bending over backward to include them in the wedding, regardless of whether they can attend every event.
And with the events in three different states and with her making it clear that they are supposed to not only fly themselves to her events but also contribute to them, this is going to end up costing them several thousand dollars, as well as the hassle being at her beck and call for six months, from February to August, and having to vet their vacation plans with her.
I'm with the consensus here that I'd be politely replying, "Thank you for the honor but I regret that I will be unable to attend."
Please don't let her be...
This bride should meet the English stepmother who wrote last year's viral e-mail sensation.
I love that this e-mail from a CONTROL FREAK has gone viral. She's probably sedated at the moment.
R44, thanks for throwing some fuel on the fire but really, hon, I think we can handle it from here.
Do I get this right? It's the most important day in her life and in this long ass mail she mentions her relationship/Jake, the reason she gets to have her biggest day, exactly twice?
Straight women.... I'm glad I don't have to deal with them.
She's obsessed with her wedding but hasn't given a thought to her marriage for life. She will be another of the many many divorced str8 women in 2 or 3 years. If that.
[quote]With it going viral, do you think the true identity of the bride will be revealed?
Probably not. I'm not buying the story. It was written by Caity Weaver who writes for Gawker and a few other sites.
Her own words "This morning a tipster forwarded us an email from a future bride".
Sounds to me like Caity needed a story, drank a bottle of wine while watching 27 dresses and penned this little canard.
I enjoyed it, but don't buy it.
Some of the stuff sounds reasonable, like giving the dates to the prospective bridesmaids months in advance, and being wiling to change dates to accomodate them. That could be very difficult if she's booking venues far in advance, so that's just organization.
But expecting a large group of women to fly all over the country at their own expense, agree to travel out of state months in advance numerous times with no way of knowing whether they'll be sick that weekend, have a family emergency, have an emergency at work where you have to come in over the weekend, or else you don't qualify as a bridesmaid? What if they're in the hospital? Is it ok to blow off some event then? Do they need a doctor's note? Ridicuous.
This bitch doesn't even know if she can show up on all these days herself for sure, or if she's even going to end up getting married with that attitude. It sounded like she's not really close with those women, maybe they are college friends or something. Sounds like some of them live far away, which means she may not have been in close touch with them for a while. It also kind of implies they may all have at least a little money, or why ask them to travel everywhere and expect them to pay for an expensive dress? If they are all rich it makes a little more sense. I could see some Paris Hilton type saying all this.
Still selfish and bitchy though.
She finally cast her groom. Jake could be any guy. I wonder what kind of soirée she'll throw if she has a baby.
That's WAY too expensive for many people. Unless all 10 women have great jobs, they will be scraping for these parties.
Why in the everloving fuck would anyone put up with this kind of shit? It would be certifiably insane to say yes to being involved with this bitch's wedding.
Where did the original email come from? I'm wondering if the bride knows she is now a cliched Internet meme.
Why should someone else's wedding cost you a small fortune?
All this extended wedding bullshit was "invented" in the last 30 years.
Ugh. I had a large wedding. It was beginning to end my mom's show and I hated every minute of it. I really wish my parents hadn't spent so much money and we had just eloped.
It just seems so wasteful especially with the way the economy is to throw away thousands and thousands of dollars on what amounts to a big party that's all about you.
Does anyone in this country know the proper usage of "there" vs. "their" vs. "they're"??? "Role" vs. "roll"???
We truly are a nation full of morons.
I like how she repeatedly reminds the prospective bridesmaid the honor they are receiving to be a prop in her the year-long buildup to her wedding day.
I seriously don't understand the trend in America to expect everyone to commit enormous time and funds for someone else's wedding.
The best wedding I've attended in many years was this summer. It was held at a state park pavillion that had been transformed with fairy lights and chinese lanterns, tons of wildflowers, white table cloths, vintage dishes, glassware and silverware the bride collected at tag sales and thrift shops. Bar limited to beer, champagne and wine (decent), soda, the meal was a catered barbecue with tons of delicious food. The band knew the couple and played for beer and food. The wedding party wore whatever they wanted, the bridesmaids had flowers in their hair and bouquets, the groomsmen had flowers in their lapels. And because they were standing up with the couple during the wedding ceremony, we all knew who was in the wedding party. The best part is that everyone had a good time, no one thought it was tacky or cheap, and the bride and groom saved about $50,000 that they will put towards a downpayment on a house.
Surely, this is not real. Right? Radar is citing Gawker. I'm a bit suspicious like Cynical Cindy. But my take on it is that someone and her (or his?) friends floated the e-mail as a joke to see how much traction it would eventually get in the media. I dunno. After so many YEARS of annoyed or amused recipients forwarding crazy e-mails, I just have to think that people have developed some understanding of how to properly utilize e-mail and exercise some restraint when there's so much potential to lose face.
I work with someone just like this... Beyotch with a capital B. God save us all.
Take a Valium honey
I don't understand the second-to-last paragraph. At first she says "don't think that you have to fly in for fittings", but also states "don't think that we will work with you or find shops in your area", and then states that they won't have to worry about stuff like that. WELL WHICH IS IT, BITCH? I GOTTA BOOK MY 5 FLIGHTS!
[quote]Getting married is the most joyful and amazing experience of one's life journey. Of course she should make sure that it is up to her standards. Why are you picking on this woman?
Because she's a cunt who is only getting married for a big show. If she truly wanted a meaningful wedding to someone she was in love with she could keep it close to home with a few close friends and relatives and not force them to spend a fortune for her. It's ALL ABOUT HER and you'd better not forget that. Anyone who says stuff like "this is what I've dreamed of since I was a little girl" has spent way too much time thinking of being a "bride". The groom is incidental and could be anyone. I'll lay odds she ends up quitting her job, makes him the sole supporter and proceeds to pop out little Madysyns and Bradens, driving them to soccer games and cheerleading classes all the while nagging the husband about never having enough money.
This whole "let's have a shower here and then another party across the country and then another one across the country" is rude unless they are all millionaires.
She is trying too hard to follow the template of the film "Bridesmaids."
Seriously, r72. She's asking these 10 women not just to shell out a ton of money for "this honor" but also use precious vacation time on her.
Easily, R74. What a bizzatch. I got married (male/male) and would not have dreamed of making anyone shell out that kind of dough or jump through that degree of logistical hoops.
Has anyone found her identity yet? If not, it's probably a fake because there is no way this cunt can keep this a secret.
Do folks really believe this scenario is real? I mean the expense alone makes this EST-worthy, no? I think it would be much more than $2,500. (remember, party and pre-event wardrobe!) Also, doesn't the whole idea of backup, less worthy of being honored potential bridesmaids sound suspiscious? I assume they would be less close to the bride and less inclined to shell out for the expense.
R68 - Still trying
"We have set our date for Saturday, August 31, 2013 in Vail, Colorado. That seems far away but it really isn't,"
Who the fuck has 10 bridesmaids at a destination wedding? Unless you're filthy rich destination weddings are smallish, because so few people are willing or able to fly somewhere for a fucking wedding. It's just not possible to make hundreds of working people fly somewhere for your convenience.
Kim Kardashian must have written this.
This cannot be real.
I feel really sorry for Jake. When they're divorced in 2 years the cunt will probably stick him with the credit card bill from the wedding they're still trying to pay off.
Depending on where all often bridesmaids live, airfare to Vail, Vegas and NYC may be very costly. And you know the dresses will be at least $500 a piece.
Certainly, Queen Bitch will want them all in the same hotel in each city.. I gather it won't be a Ramada Inn or a Motel 6. Because, dontcha' know, she's too good for that.
Sounds like an entitled, spoiled cunt who is used to her rich father paying for everything. She lives in a little bubble and just assumes everyone lives that way.
[quote]You all have a big roll in this wedding...
I'm just happy that Lisa Beamer has found love again.
"...and for those of you on the itty-bitty titty committee, it is mandatory that you have your breast augmentation completed by the first of July so that any swelling will have subsided in time for your final dress fitting."
Do not make me repeat myself.
Is she a gypsy?
Still waiting for it to be revealed as a hoax.
Out little E.S.T. has grown up and moved out into the big world.
I think she sounds like a cunt, but if you're close enough friends with someone like this to be a bridesmaid then you should know what to expect.
If I were one of these women I'd agree to it all and at a really crucial moment flake or embarrass her. Hilarity would ensue!
Not sure if I buy this as real or not, but it's fun nonetheless.
I vote "not a bridezilla." Why? Because she lays out the agenda in excruciating detail before anyone commits to anything. All the recipients of the email have an easy out. This is very different from a situation where someone agrees to be a bridesmaid, only to THEN find themselves facing an ever-escalating sequence of exasperating demands for time, money, and attention. In this case, anyone agreeing to be a bridesmaid goes in knowing the full deal up front.
She sounds like a horrible person, and she provides additional affirmation for a decision I made about fifteen years ago to never again attend a wedding (and I haven't-- I've probably turned down about 30 invites over the years. I just won't go). Still, I can't call her a bridezilla: she's laid out all her demands before anyone has any obligation to fulfill them.
"I vote "not a bridezilla." Why? Because she lays out the agenda in excruciating detail before anyone commits to anything. "
I wouldn't say that the advance warning disqualifies her from being a Bridezilla. Neither do her insane demands for time, money, travel, and service.
Rather, I'd say it shows she's perfectly aware of what a Bridezilla she is, and is quite unrepentant about being one.
I really want this to be real. If it is, she's got to be humiliated, and doomed groom needs a way out.
Doesn't matter if it's real or not, you know these bitches exist.
Of course she is a bridezilla. The lack of manners and proper etiquette is amazing for someone who actually believes she is entitled to this shindig.
First, the family of the bride NEVER throws a shower or any other event requiring a gift except for the wedding. So totally unaceptable for her sister to be planning the shower.
[quote] Etiquette states that for every attendant, there should be 50 guests
That is for ushers. Not for bridal attendants.
Sadly the entire e-mail is simply rude and narcissistic. No decent person puts their "friends" through this. I might suggest she's young but then her mother should step in and put an end to this - especially since she and the father are probably paying for the wedding. It's their fault as much as hers.
The little mention of the groom is typical. I read an excrutiatingly detailed account of an proposal and the celebrations after. It was all very showy and filmed. On her wedding web page except for one mention of the groom-to-be who had gone to considerable trouble planning for months and paying for all this, including the now obligatory "engagement trip" to some overpriced Hawaiian resort, the groom seemed non-existent. The only time he was mentioned was in describing what he did for her which made her seem like some princess worthy of all this fuss and expense. There was nothing about her love for him or their future together or her happiness with him or what a great guy he was - and he WAS a great guy. Poor sod. They now have 2 children, a gigantic McMansion (their 1st house purchase) they can barely afford and a looming divorce.
Many years ago right after Princess Diana's wedding I was in a bridal party. I was reluctant to do it since I was in law school at the time and working so I was very busy with little money to piss away on junk dresses and dying some fucking shoes to match.
It became a nightmare and we ended up looking like little Martha Mitchells. Her "present" to us as bridesmaids who had spent a fortune in money and time on this bitch - cheap fake little pearl necklaces. I have refused every request to be in a wedding party since - though most of my friends are not like this with their weddings.
I also thought that wedding party members didn't need to give gifts - in fact no one is required by etiquette to give the couple gifts anyway. But those in the party who have already spent tons of money should be told privately NOT to worry about gifts.
Someone needs to find the groom and seduce him away thereby saving his life.
Not all of these grooms are nice guys being victimized by a madwoman waving bridal magazines, some guys actually WANT this kind of relationship.
There are straight men out there who don't want to contribute anything to a relationship but money. They want women who are hot, and who are satisfied with material things rather than passion or intimacy. Sometimes these guys have serious self-esteem issues, or they just think of a wife as an accessory they've bought.
Brides are the most self-absorbed, delusional people in America. No one gives a shit about their fucking "special day" but them, their mom, and the salivating hos that dream about having a "special day" one day, too, where they can boss everyone around.
I've had fully rational, cool female friends become fucking obnoxious over their damn wedding. It's odd for people to spend so much money to be the center of attention with everyone pretending to be "overjoyed" for them.
Hint: people just want to drink and have a party no one cares what color your "dream" napkins are.
So much jealousy on this thread. I have a feeling that since you don't have marriage rights that you have misdirected rage towards this woman.
I predict that at least five of the original ten will not be in the wedding party.
what kind of a freak is r96?
R81, I think just the opposite. This woman doesn't sound like she comes from money - she sounds like someone trying to make people think she has, with superior taste than everybody else. Very middle class. Frankly she sounds like an obnoxious gay man who thinks he has better taste than everybody else. She sounds like some provincial Chicago queer.
R94, there are plenty of gay men like that too. A lot of men just want a "wife" and as long as they're the primary bread winner, they think their wants, wishes and perception of everything dominates.
Ironic that gay men play such a HUGE part of the wedding industry...florists, caterers, wedding planners, dress designers...gay gay gay. We've helped create these bridezillas and are making millions off them.
R96=frau googling "special day" linked to DL
Though I'm guessing most of this bitch's friends are like her, I bet at least one of the bridesmaids was like "fuck this shit" and will lie about having to miss the pre-events as not to be part of the actual wedding.
If you have a cunt between you legs, the divorce judge will probably stick it to the male. Always works this way, even though she is a raging bitch.
Bride 2B is a young American Hyacinth Bucket!
R96 I'm a straight girl who had a wedding eons ago and I think this woman is a cunt.
She must've been inspired by the season premier of 30 Rock.
She sounds HORRIBLE. I'm surprised she has any friends at all. I hope they all bail on her.
Honestly, it'd be easier to just hire some out-of-work actresses to be your bridesmaids than to get a bunch of real people to agree to all this crap. The cost would be negligible compared to the rest of the wedding expenses, and during their performance they'd do anything the bride wanted.
Seriously, if I were a young, broke actress, I'd advertise. I'd even promise to improvise about my "new BFF" relationship with the bride.
This is so clearly an EST. I want a job where I can write for a publication that allows me to publish "viral emails that have been floating around." Uh huh. The author of this clumsy mess hit all the right "freak show" buttons to get her article noticed. But, as usual, she couldn't help herself and went way OTT. Someone should tell her (like someone should tell her fictional bride) that less---way less, is more.
The ultimate nightmare for these girls who dream of a perfect dream wedding is for them to not find anyone to marry them and end up spinsters. At least this girl found a willing Jake. Others are not so lucky and wind up being fat, single, middle-aged Twilight and 50 Shades readers.
For me, it's the choice of "Jake" as a name that sends a whiff of EST. If this were real he'd just be a Brian or Phil.
Why is the sister's name censored but they print Jake?
Wheather this is true or not it certainly sounds like lots of women i have known. I really like the part where she tells them that she will have to cut them as bridesmaids they will still be on the guest list. letting them know they are still on the hook for a gift.
Do we know her identity yet?
If this is real, Jake needs to run and hide.
Apparently Veruca Salt is getting married next August!
No, even the most insane cunt out there wouldn't attempt to get away with instructing 10 of her best friends that they must lock in their lives for seven months, commit to the expense of numerous trips, and promise a degree of responsiveness available from no professional today except ambulance drivers. Women may want to do this, and expect they have a right, but with 10 maids there is an incredible amount of wedding experience involved, and these women would not be tolerant or unaware of the practical consequences of such overt offensiveness. Meaning, we're not talking about a cunt here. We're talking about one cunt crossing 10 others.
Even though the message smacks of ESTrollery, it does capture the spirit, tastelessness, rudeness, cluelessness, meanness, spite, ignorance and psychosis today's brides evidence. We've all seen it.
So, what happened?
[quote]I don't understand the second-to-last paragraph. At first she says "don't think that you have to fly in for fittings", but also states "don't think that we will work with you or find shops in your area", and then states that they won't have to worry about stuff like that. WELL WHICH IS IT, BITCH? I GOTTA BOOK MY 5 FLIGHTS!
It's the bridezilla's poor writing skills at fault again. She neglected to separate "Don't think that" from "We will work with you".
I love how she referred to the "honor" of being her bridesmaid TWICE!
"Oh my God. I'm back. I'm home. All the time, it was... We finally really did it ... You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!"
We are switching to the new platform for The DataLounge this weekend. All of our mobile users have been using it for over a week and all first time users have been using it for about a month - which adds up to well over one million users. So we're ready to end this phase of the testing and move everybody to the new site. (more)
And yes, we've changed the look and some of how it operates.
Yes, we know you just *hate* it in well in advance.
Yes, we know we suck.
Yes, we are the biggest suckers that ever sucked.
But it was time for a change and with the huge shift to mobile it was long overdue. We've taken this opportunity not only to update the look but also make major changes under the hood (or "bonnet" if you're either British or pretentious or both). And we have to prepare for 2016 - a presidential election year where we can normally expect to see a 60% jump in traffic (yes, we've seen 5 presidential elections so far…Christ we're old).
The site has a bunch - nay, plethora - of new features which will make the site more usable: better search, the ability to ignore posters and threads, see link previews, to pick up a thread where you left off, spam and malware filtering and more.
If you want you can go explore and see for yourself, Click here.
And while running the tests we've noticed two interesting reactions to the new system - people are spending more time on the site and more people that come stay around longer and look at more stuff. Both good things. Yay!
Possibly we've not slain all the dragons and there will be issues that come up during the switchover. There's a help button in the lower right hand corner of the page which you can use to send us bug reports.
Please include as much information about the hardware (PC, Mac, Tablet, Phone etc), operating system (Windows, Mac OS, Android, iOS etc) and browser (Chrome, Safari, Opera, Internet Explorer etc) that you are using as possible to help us replicate and fix the problem.
Please note that complaints about colors, fonts, icons and the like are not "bugs" - they are design choices that we've made and we expect one or two cases of world-class bitching. But they won't actually cause headaches, scurvy, heart attacks, Restless Leg Syndrome, Morgellon's Disease or the vapors (but have your smelling salts at hand just in case).
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