Does it revolt you if you see one dangling from your trick's hole? Do they distinct from anal warts? Do the internal ones hurt when you're being pounded?
I almost spit all over my screen, R1. VERY appropriate reply.
There was a guy I once picked up at a bar who turned out to have a nasty case of them--when I pried his cheeks open and saw them I was rather put off the idea of screwing his ass and told him that he really should have them removed and that it wouldn't be a good idea to fuck him. He said he planned to; in the meantime he got his otherwise nice ass spanked until his buttcheeks were a nice rosy glow. Or, if you want the short answer--I wouldn't.
Wear a condom and fuck away.
Wait. Hemorrhoids can "dangle?"
That settles it. There is no God.
This Week in DL has been pretty rough in the ass ewww subject area. I find that whenever this happens, it puts me off behinds for awhile.
However, when the UPS man came today, he delivered several packages along with a doorbell ring and a jaunty knock. I looked out from upstairs, but all I could see was from the brown shorts down. It was enough, my oh my.
I don't know what it is about the UPS uniforms, but they seem to make even very average men look above average. There was one UPS guy who delivered where I used to work as a receiving clerk; we developed a kind of "rapore" and quite often if he wanted a favor from me the payment was to smack his ass in those oddly sexy brown pants--I think he may have enjoyed being spanked.
Oh, dear, dear, dear.
OK then, rapport--I was half asleep when I wrote it, think of it as "poetic license". Now level with me, both 8 and 9 were PPSM, right?
PS, PPSM (if it is you) you really ought to save your ire for those who ask the question, usually while talking loudly and rudely in public on cell phones, "where are you 'AT'".
Now level with us, anon -- you're an illiterate dumbass, right?
I thought this thread was about hemorrhoids r12 not your aching desire to inquire about my literacy or being a dumbass; perhaps you are the original hemorrhoid. To answer your question about being an illiterate dumbass I will say that I can certainly hold my own compared to many who post here, at least--maybe even someone as high and mighty as you!
actually, it's a known fact that getting fucked regularly is one of the best ways to prevent hemmoroids (or however you spell it).
Bullshit r14, you wish.
Do you mean that if you get fucked regularly, you can kiss your hemorrhoids good bye?
I'm surprised that this subject doesn't come up more on these boards. I read recently that 50% of Americans will experience hemorrhoids at some point in their lives. This evidently has been linked to the design of the modern toilet... something about how we evolved to squat in fields, so when we're sitting upright on a toilet and bearing down it puts pressure on the veins down there and causes 'roids.
I have not read anything to indicate that anal sex causes or prevents hemorrhoids (though it does seem as though being anally penetrated while you have untreated hemorrhoids could be painful and cause great physical irritation). Even if that's not the case, I can't think of anything so dick-withering as the sight of an ass full of hemorrhoids.
"Dick Withering"? I think I've just found a new drag name!
R14 is correct, R15, to a point. Stimulating the anal area is a great way to avoid the on-set of hemorrhoids; a hemorrhoid is not an STD, it's not contagious. There are obviously different types of hemorrhoids which might not lend themselves to vigorous activity such as external hemorrhoids. A hemorrhoid, even an internal one, might be accompanied by a anal fissure so anal intercourse might prove uncomfortable in that circumstance and you'd of course want to to use a condom and avoid any ejaculation near your anus.
The cause of hemorrhoids is largely unknown, though a lot is known about the circumstances in which they occur - often when people are constipated, they push their stool and put intra-abdominal pressure on the blood veins around the anus. They are very common; in men over 40, it is said that over half of the population suffers from hemorrhoids. Most women who have had babies suffer from hemorrhoids.
Of course, one of the worst things about them is their name. And among the number of causes, they are thought to be hereditary. Never push and maintain a diet high in fiber and you might avoid them - but that's no guarantee.
The Chinese consider them a delicacy, and will pay up to $50,000 for a pound.
I had a really big one. After it was removed I decided to preserve it in a jar of formaldehyde. People often think it's a fetus.
what do you do about them once you have them? is there any treatment other than eating a fiber-rich diet?
I can't imagine anyone wanting to fuck when you have Hemorrhoids. JFC!!! I hear they hurt like hell so I can't imagine how much worse it would feel to be fucked on top of that. Also, it must also make one more susceptible to all kinds of std's.
They grow and shrink and you can help them along with Preparation H.
Close your eyes and pretend they're speed bumps.
Licking a hemmer is better than a shit hole.
Anyone ever have a pilonidal cyst? How to get rid of THOSE?
One more reason, pussy's better than shithole.
Honeys, it's the closest thing to a clitoris that Momma's ever gonna have, so I love when my blatino cagemeat pounds my mussy clit!
try external castor oil as treatment - "wear" some to bed
[quote] Do they distinct from anal warts?
They do distinct, OP. When they're septic they distinct like rotten hamburger.
A little like your brain, too, for that matter.
I had a large external one and two smaller ones inside. I had them removed, the smaller internal ones would get inflamed and very painful during a flare up. The rectum would practically swell shut. It's fine now, I make sure to eat plenty of fiber and never ever ever sit on the toilet and read or strain.
The exterior one looked like a clitoris, it was nasty looking. I wanted that one removed more for cosmetic reasons as it had not flared up in years. It was like a huge skin tag by that point, ugly as heck. Back in the early webcam days in the 90's, I remember spreading my ass to people when they requested and then they drop out of the chat. It looked like an ugly tiny finger, ugh.
[quote]we evolved to squat in fields
we evolved to poop in stores, but society insists we use toilets
This is the best thread EVER!
When I have mine removed, I'm going to save them and turn them into ART!
I will never forget the Howard Stern show which featured a $5,000 prize for the worst hemm's.
Nearly 100 men and 3 women showed up for the call, and a doctor of proctology and gay Raoul did the initial look-sees to narrow it down to the best(or worst)8 for the TV show.
Everyone of them gladly w/o shame dropped their pants or pantyhose and spread 'em for Howie, Artie and Robin(who is a BSN)and I have never laughed so much in my life. Not so much was I laughing at the poor folks and their hemm's but at the hosts who were either on the verge of fainting or vomiting the whole show.
Each was worse than the one before, but every one was hanging at least 4 inches from the anus. The winner's was indeed according to the doctor, the worst case he had ever viewed even in medical school. It was the sized of a small catcher's mitt and hung 8 inches and was 7 inches wide. He could tuck most of it up inside, but can you imagine what it would be like to live with that? OBAMACARE NOW!
So the biggest hemorrhoid was larger than the dick on the winner of the Smallest Penis Contest?
 Dude it was bigger than the BIGGEST penis contest! It was like a new born baby.
R29 - surgery is the only way to get rid of that cyst. The surgery is pretty wicked and takes a long time to heal. My friend had it removed when he was in high school. Imagine being 15 and having that type of major surgery . Check out YouTube for examples of the surgery.
My I never had huge hemorrhoids like what is described in the previous posts, yuck!!! But, I had small hemorrhoids for years which I bled off and on. I went to the doctor now and then for years. At one point I had to see my recent doctor immediately because I felt such intense pain which escalated to the point that it was excruciating ,and I was bleeding a lot! In addition to my hemorrhoids, I had fissures that were so bad that my doctor said my skin was ripped to shreds. I had no idea that my situation was that bad because I have always been so used to having hemorrhoids on and off for a long time I never thought I was in such a horrible situation.My doctor avoided surgery as much as possible because he said when you have surgery, the pain is much more worse, and unbearable! I took my fiber pills and drank more water than usual because I only drink water, and I never drink soft drinks. They went away but they basically come and go still. You have to constantly eat healthy. Also, exercise is a huge factor that will reduce hemorrhoids.
Thanks R43. I should check out youtube but I'm kinda scared. But I guess I gotta know what I'm in for. I have a recurring one and it's a pain in the ass (pun intended).
I can tell you from experience the recovery from my surgery was excruciating. I was in bed for two days on vicodin every four hours and toradol every six hours.
I moved my bowels the second day and literally screamed (I know, Mary!) from the pain, plus blood splattered everywhere. Awful. I stayed home the whole week from work. I'm happy to be 'roid free now though!
This thread is making me horny as HELL!
 am happy for you that all is well!
earthclinic.com has good tips for how to deal
I have had my beloved Hems for over 35 years. Got them when I was in my late teens and thought I was dying. Blood coming out of my ass! My doctor laughed and told me to use Prep H. Well they never really went away. But this was the late 70s early 80s and because I was so ashamed of them, I never had any gay sex during that time. This shame actually saved my life, because had I not had them, I'm sure I would be an AIDS statistic by now. They no longer hurt or bleed, but they are always there. The surgery option seemed to extreme and I never bottom, so it's never been an issue. But I'm sure they saved my life.
We have a lot in common, R50. Everything you said applies to me except age.
Very interesting and strangely fortuitous gentlemen. Glad you're both healthy, but I'm sorry you have the 'roids all the damn time.
[bold]Can you fuck when you have hemroids?[/bold]
It depends on the level of one's motivation.
Fuck no! Most painful experience of my life!
If you limit yourself to ten loads you'll be fine, OP.
Howard Stern is beyond gross. what a complete sick pig! They poster who thought that people showing their most worst case of hemorrhoids, and the staff getting sick after seeing them is funny, is completely insane because that is really scrapping the bottom of the barrel to get a laugh.
Well R56 I laughed my fucking ass off. I couldn't even make it through the rest of that poster's paragraph for a few minutes, his description alone was killing me. OMG!
Googled a preview of the actual show and I must've laughed for fifteen straight minutes.
Anal sex may feel good for the top but, overall, it is tedious and tiresome and fraught with risk of disease and other painful maladies. I'm not het but anal sex is not for me.
i have been struggling with this for a while. got hems during college, and still struggle with trying to bottom successfully. it's stopped me from really experiencing that part of gay sex and i hate that. i take a lot of fiber and that helps a lot, but i still can't seem to really enjoy pain free bottoming. never sure if that's from the h's or that's really how it feels
R46 same experience. If I had any idea of the pain involved I would never have agreed to that surgery.
Seven years later, despite increased use of fiber and eating lots of vegetables and fruits a few have reappeared.
My new doctor explained that in my case, I have an unusually long bowel tract, and extra fiber is not enough. He recommended stool softeners twice a day and drinking lots of water. So far so good.
What about cauterizing them? Sounds like it might be a less painful procedure, less recovery time and a more permanent result.
I got my first hemorrhoid at 33 a few months ago. It didn't itch or anything, but there was a small bump. I went to my doctor and he prescribed Proctosol-HC. It took about a month, but the bump completely went away. Haven't had another one since and hope to God I never will. It wasn't bleeding or itchy or uncomfortable, but I don't want to have a bump on my ass.
[R62] have you been bottoming since you had said hemorrhoid?
I've never bottomed, R63.
r62 is your prescription a REQUIRED prescription or can it be obtained over the counter?
R65, no, it's not an OTC. He had to write out a prescription.
R61, I had a gastroenterologist tell me the same thing about hems--that they'd burn them off.
I can fuck with 'roids. I am a total top so it's no bother to me at all. I can still drill your ass and make you see God!