Every gay guy I meet, from San Francisco, is a pretentious snot
I've always loved SF - but it has gone downhill. Walk the streets, and all I smell is urine, it's filthy, homeless people sleeping everywhere, traffic is horrendous. The charm is gone . But everyone living there is so defensive, and refuses to acknowledge this. They think their s_ _t don't smell, and they live in the greatest place ever. Look down on every other city- LA, NYC, Chicago, Miami. Why ?
I agree, but have no answer for you.
Same with the NYC gays.
Because They're paying out the wahoo to live there.
When the great homeless migration moved into San Francisco, I moved back to NYC. The climate is a big draw. Every ghetto has a palm tree and a view.
Because most of them are really from someplace else. Leaving their small minded hick towns and moving to SF was a huge leap for them. They think this makes them superior to others with a similar background. Because their entire persona is wrapped up with where they live, they cant easily acknowledge that things are not as swell as they like to think they are.
Huh, news to me. Guess I'm not paying attention.
I agree with R4. Every city that has major transient populations has the same problem. When people talk about how vapid LA people are, they really mean the fame hungry transplants. New York assholes? Iowans playing a part. San Francisco attracts well intended fringe people. The only major city that will allow them to be as they are is SF (and maybe Portland). So they get there and then have to espouse how perfect the town is because, well, to them it is, and because, they finally have the freedom to be douchebags, out and proud.
RE - By George, I think you've got it !
I think DC is the same way too. A haven for flyovers or a stop along to the way to NY or LA.
I vote for NYC. It's not for everyone, but it is the best city for gay people.
I'm sure a lot of you still live in hickville and are just jealous because you can't afford to live in a world class city like San Francisco.
This last post shows the validity of the the comment above it. They are finally free to be assholes themselves coming from their own "hickville".
While predicting what an insecure asshole would say is not exactly rocket science, R10 pretty much confirms what we've all suspected.
r10 - OP's complaint is not primarily about the CITY of San Francisco -- it's about the attitude of those who live there. There are many awesome major cities (great access to art, museum, opera, dance, theatre, sports arenas) that do not have pretentious little snots who presume to believe they live in Utopia.
I'm supposed to seriously consider the opinion of somebody who can't spell out the word [bold]SHIT[/bold]?
I've always met decent guys there -- except in the Castro, which just feels full of people trying very hard to have a good time.
People have always been nice around the city, and the bars south of Market and the few remaining in the Tenderloin/Polk area can be fun.
Of course I'm not an 'A-gay' -- they'd be as bored with me as I would with them.
People from SF all seem to think that people from the East Coast are all "uptight".
OP is correct, mention you're from LA and they're all tell you how sorry they are for you. Fuck them!
I always refer to their city as "Frisco" just to watch all their heads explode.
It's a laugh riot!
I agree completely..and I only live an hour from SF
San Francisco is hardly a world-class city. More like a provincial town with a small-minded view that is not sophisticated.
Half of the men there are FTMs anyways...
r 17 - I pull the 'Frisco' card too, and watch them have a melt down. Just that should tell you what OP is referring to. I have friends in Chicago, and call it 'Chi -town'. They don't care. Los Angeles - everyone calls it L.A. or
LA , like do -re- me- fa-so-LA. No one cares. But this 'Frisco' BS. It's like your calling their city Fuck Alley.
[quote]Every city that has major transient populations has the same problem.
Yes, but the point is that most large American cities don't *have* major transient populations, or at least not on the scale of SF or on the level of living literally on the streets. NYC at least has SROs for long-term homeless. SF and L.A. have it arguably the worst in this country because of their moderate climates.
Btw I'd say SF has several distinct problems, which I say as a resident. You have the types R4 describes, which can also be found in NYC and L.A. in particular, who are overly proud of themselves for moving to the Big City and overly defense of it. You have the "precious twee" crowd, similar to Portland's, that goes apeshit over stuff like organically grown free-trade coffee served in beakers and whatnot, and disdains even Whole Foods because it's not "local" enough. You have the "techie asshole" crowd, similar to Austin's, that's surgically attached to their iPhones (and it is ALWAYS an iPhone, except for the minority who will argue to the end of the earth that Apple is a "cult" and buy anything BUT an Apple product) and tweets or Tumblr-blogs every single fucking thought that comes to their heads. In the middle are all the gays and their unfortunate subsets, whether it be militant dykes or the leather/piercing queens that embarrass the shit out of the global gay community each year at the Folsom Street Fair.
As you may have surmised by now, I'm getting out of this hellhole as soon as I can secure a job elsewhere.
I moved to San Francisco in 1977 and I'm still here. Sorry, guys, if you hate the place, but I've always loved it.
OP - That sentence did not need any commas.
OP is right. It's why we stay in Tahoe.
R23 doesn't know any better.
Hawaii is full of them. I sometimes wonder how they afford the trip there. Once there they seem to stay though. I guess it is the weather and free food?
I find that the whites up there, and it is white people only, try to 'out liberal' each other.
If you say you are vegetarian they will snub you for not being vegan.
If there is a culture that offends you, you are a low-I.Q. bigot.
If you take buses for transpo they will knock you for not riding a bike.
It is simply too much work socializing with the San Fran crowd.
R22, I meant transient in terms of fleeting or not for the long haul or not a native, not the homeless. That's a totally different conversation. But as a native of Los Angeles, I hear you...
Yup, San Francisco is a hellhole. Don't move here. If you already live here, leave. Spread the word to all your friends. Maybe if enough people leave, the housing prices will slide and I can afford to buy.
OP is from Minnesota.
I lived in San Francisco for years (born and raised in Boston) and loved every minute of it. I still love it when I visit friends there because it's a beautiful and interesting city. I met assholes and I met great people there, just like everywhere else.
The homeless population is an issue but it's an issue in every city or town that provides semi-decent services for the homeless. I've noticed it in Santa Barbara where I now live. Places that refuse to help the homeless may see fewer of them on the street but that level of social irresponsibility doesn't appeal to me as a place to live.
have you not seen the south park episode where they all smell their own farts in san fran?
if you only meet pretentious snots, then that's who you attract and look for. I've met and loved many wonderful gay guys here.
yes, I came from a small New England town, and I'm glad the city has people from all over. if everyone acted the same the city would die, and gentrification is trying to accomplish just that.
as far as seeing homeless people, SF is small in area to begin with, and the downtown is a tiny percentage of area that is hard to avoid.
In contrast, Los Angeles is very expansive, and most of its homeless people stay in Skid Row, which most Angelenos have to go out of their way to visit.
why not consider what life is like for homeless people, or better yet, get involved with an organization that serves homeless people?
at best this country treats people as disposable, especially if they are different in some way. we'd rather flush our troubling images away than tend to them.
San Francisco has many things about it I'd like to see change, but to paraphrase Bill Clinton, there is nothing wrong with San Francisco that can't be fixed by what is right with San Francisco
If something happens to you more than once or twice.
OP, perhaps they're angry with you for your overuse of commas.
I hate to say it but R4 and R6 speak the truth. Native Californians do tend to feel this way about Midwestern transplants. Natives resent the fact that many of the transplants from that region bring their small-mindedness,bigotry, and red-state ideology (or theology) along with them. However, they usually fit in quite well in Orange County.
I don't hate SF but it is a small town and in no way an actual city.
For the love of God, would someone please shit in my mouth?!!!!
[quote]it has gone downhill. Walk the streets, and all I smell is urine, it's filthy, homeless people sleeping everywhere, traffic is horrendous. The charm is gone . But everyone living there is so defensive, and refuses to acknowledge this. They think their s_ _t don't smell, and they live in the greatest place ever
[quote]most of them are really from someplace else. Leaving their small minded hick towns and moving to SF was a huge leap for them. They think this makes them superior to others with a similar background. Because their entire persona is wrapped up with where they live, they cant easily acknowledge that things are not as swell as they like to think they are
describe every big city. A lifelong NYer, I've seen both the downhill turn AND the newbie snobbery, and find myself wondering about a life in the country.
I have no beef in this argument, but R34's post is the height of irony.
All the sissies who played with dolls went to NYC and the queer Eagle Scouts with merit badges went to SF.
Never the twain shall meet.
I lived in SF in the late 70s. Believe it or not, that silly pretentiousness was there then too. And, yes, as someone pointed out, the worst snobs were from somewhere else, usually some small town in the Midwest, and thought they were suddenly "Big City Sophisticates" the moment they stepped off the Greyhound bus.
Went there last two years in a row after 20 year gap. Was expecting the worst but it was still great! Maybe more panhandlers but has just kept pace with all other big cities. Castro not what it used to be, but neither is Key West. More touristy and less quaint. Still really enjoyed myself.
I lived there for 20 years (moved there from Boston) and was always hoping to get to that point where the City became a part of me and I a part of it. This is sort of the core of alot of SF's history: people falling in love with the City and having that moment of finding the one place they will live and eventually die. It is part of the magical folkloric tale that people go there to find. I never achieved that. By the time I left I felt that the dream of SF had become a reality of overpriced real estate, an amzingly aggressive homeless situation that NO ONE was doing anything about and a population overrun with the worst kind of rude Yuppie spawns. Oh and a crazy amount of middle class heroin/crystal meth addicts. Of course I also was there during the worst of the AIDS nightmare so it had become haunted by hundreds of ghosts. So I left and live back East now. I miss the idea of SF but not the actuality.
Interesting take, R28. This is what people who are desperate for approval devolve to. It's sad that they are put into that position of patheticness.
It's the butt plugs.
Once removed, they mellow out.
One thing to keep in mind, OP, is the the MAJORITY of gay guys anywhere are pretentious snots/airheads/dumbasses/etc. -- just as the majority of ALL PEOPLE are those things. I wish you luck in finding quality friends.
My advice? Stay clear of bars. Any bars. All bars. They attract certain kinds of homo we're all better off without.
Bengali in Platforms
The average length of time gay men live in SF is just short of 5 years. That says it all.
I cry when I think about Armistead Maupin's trashy bf making him move to Santa Fe. Who would ever want to leave gorgeous SF?
Me. I would want to leave "gorgeous SF." It's a ridiculous city. What OP says is correct.
San Francisco is probably the worst place I've ever lived.
And this is what continues to segregate the good old USA from actually integrating ALL people.
What it says R49, is nobody can afford to live there but the people who own property.
Once upon a time there were three little girls who went to the police academy...two in Los Angeles, the other in San Francisco. And the one from San Francisco was such a pretentious snot, I assigned her very hazardous duties in the hope that she'd get shot in the head.
I hope your happy, you made Scott MacKenzie so sad that he killed himself.
Now the "Summer of Love" is officially dead.
He was struggling for two years with an auto-immune disorder.
[quote]He was struggling for two years with an auto-immune disorder.
I read that as auto-tune disorder and was getting pissed.
It always cracked me up how superior the SF denizens were. All at the same time keeping their "darkies" in the East Bay. Real progressive, uh huh... Just like NYC - "Oh we're so racially integrated, at least we keep our blacks on the same ISLAND as ourselves, just as long as they stay above 96th street!" This is why Atlanta is the #1 gay city in America (look it up) - it is a truly integrated town, puts its money where its mouth is.
San Francisco born and raised (reared?:), and I can't stand the place anymore. As a kid in the 70s I didn't think I'd ever want to leave it. That was before the Milk-Moscone murders, and the shift in power to DiFi and her shady backers from which the place has never recovered.
It's entirely fitting that the remake of " The Invasion of the Bodysnatchers" was filmed there.
Love him or hate him, Jim Goad nailed it.
I still love SF. Though I only experience it on 4-7 day visits, so maybe it's easier to put aside the negatives. And, I'm usually with people I like, so I can ignore any pretentiousness. And, I have met very nice locals. So, still love, it, but my experience may be narrow.
Rock Hudson took it up the bum there.
[quote]I still love SF. Though I only experience it on 4-7 day visits, so maybe it's easier to put aside the negatives. And, I'm usually with people I like, so I can ignore any pretentiousness. And, I have met very nice locals. So, still love, it, but my experience may be narrow.
I feel the same way -- great city for a vacation or business trip -- though I don't care for the Castro.
SF did not put all its minorities in the East Bay. What a strange thing to say.
SF is simply better than where you live.
Move to the upper east coast. Most of the guys here are just snots.
My boyfriend and I went to SF for vacation for six days. Went out a lot to gay bars and clubs and everyone seemed really friendly for the most part.
I'm not rejecting the idea that SF gays are snotty and pretentious, but didn't see much of it as a tourist.
Anyone who gives a shit whether you want to call it "Frisco" or "San FranSuzy" is an idiot. I can't even imagine a reason to start a conversation with someone like that.
Call it whatever you like.
Anyone who claims that San Francisco is a world-class city is delusional. LA is more "world-class" than S.F. and LA isn't close to "world-class." San Francisco is only 800,000 people, hardly has an arts scene, and is really provincial, in many ways. Plus, for a city that claims to be "sophisticated", the locals, including the gay community, dress like crap. No sense of individual style.
There are only about five true "world-class" cities: NY, London, Paris, Tokyo and, perhaps Berlin.
You can find pretentiousness in any major city, but SF folks have a sense of "specialness" that's beyond annoying. I like to visit there, but couldn't live there. People who leave often talk about a sense of not imagining that they could live anywhere elese until they actually leave and then the insularity and limitations become evident.
I moved there in 1978 and left 15 years later. It always billed itself as a place for nonconformist but one had to conform quick in order to get the rent together.
The place sure pales compared to new York or even LA really.
"This is why Atlanta is the #1 gay city in America..."
Only long after we burned it to the ground.
Far too many tattoos...horrible.
There is a South Park episode about this. SF guys actually smell their own farts in it. Or maybe it's the Simpsons. One of the two. And they don't have smog there, they have smug.
I'm always drunk in San Francisco......
I'm never feeling any pain.
But tell me, why does San Francisco,
just like a lover's kiss, go straight to my brain?