Yea, I know ... 99% of the guys are bottoms... but that is not my experience. I'm a top who is looking for a bottom but it always seem to go wrong.
I'm not interested in guys who just want to wank or guys that are "versatile." I just want to meet a guy who is a bottom and therefore compatible with me.
If I meet a guy and want to go home with him, how do I politely say what I want without appearing crude?
my bottom is behind me, that is how I identify it.
I can understand, I'm a guy who prefers to top but who tends to end up talking to other dudes who feel the same way. I've also been there wondering how to politely ask a dude if he likes to bottom.
Thanks R2. I think this whole thing about bottoms is a myth.
If his legs automatically go up and his toes point to Jesus, he is a bottom.
Such clear cut lines OP, bottom top? aren't we all versatile really?
Not all of us are versatile.
I'm a top. It's not that I have anything against bottoming. My boyfriend of three years is a bottom and I love him more than anything.
But some people just don't have that desire.
My bf doesn't like getting blow jobs for instance.
It all depends on the person and what they like.
Before I found my husband, I relate to the original post.
It was kinda hard to find a polite way to ask which position a partner preferred... and if you didn't, you sometimes ended up in awkward situations.
"Oh, so you're a top too?"
"Hmm. Wanna watch a movie?"
dude if it was me all you would have to do is just take me.
Don't you just tuck a coloured bandanna into your pocket?
or a banana in your pocket?
Just date someone smaller than you. Then they will have to bottom for you.
It's the law.
I've mainly bottomed for shorter guys
If I'm going home with someone I let them know what I prefer and ask if that works for them.
Just cut straight (no pun intended) to the chase.
Op this is not difficult.
As you are talking..."I am a total top, is that going to work for you?'
Now how hard was that?
I once met a guy whose fast rule whether to bottom or top depended on whose cock was bigger. If his was bigger, he topped.
When we went home together, he assumed that he was bigger. When we finally revealed and I won, he explained his rule to me. I'm basically a top so no problem, but I was amused at his "hard" rule. He had a fantastic cock btw, worthy of all sorts of juicy activities. And he was from Greece.
R10 speaks the truth. Being 5'7, I've literally had no choice but to be a bottom.
R15 as someone the same height I am a top.
You chose bottomhood because it works for you, it has fuck all to do with height.
[quote]If I meet a guy and want to go home with him, how do I politely say what I want without appearing crude?
You can't. Since, as you stated, the odds are heavily in your favor, just take a hot guy home and bring it up there. On the highly unlikely chance he's a total top, just blow each other and engage in some mutual JO.
Or you could just cruise guys on Grindr or Manhunt, where such questions are either already answered for you (on Manhunt, at least) or at the very least not inappropriate subject matter by any standard.
By the slime trail?
I hate to be the one to say it, but most guys will bottom, "for the right guy." So you're just not the right guy.
you rub it's belly in a clockwise motion when he bends over and show you his taint you know
Thanks everyone for the responses. I'd like to meet R7 but is seems unlikely to happen by chance. I agree with R19 LAST sentence. I'm not the right guy for everyone. I just want to be the right guy for someone who is a bottom. I'm going out this weekend and taking several people's advice from above, I'm going to be direct but figure the best way is to slip it into the conversation casually.
You can find us in the aisle where psyllium husks are sold.
LOL @ R22. Or the Fleet aisle.
Interesting, OP. I prefer to bottom but I only seem to meet bottoms. :(
Drop the soap.
I used to think I could ID a bottom by watching the way he flirted. Maybe I just got lucky, because I tended to be right. Or maybe that was just because there are supposedly so many more bottoms. Which wasn't my experience back when I was looking, but whatever.
OP, 99% of guys ARE bottoms, but only about 25% will admit it. So just asking won't do it. Just let them know that you are a TOTAL top, and see how they react. In fact if you make it widely known, the bottoms will come to you, believe me.
[quote]My bf doesn't like getting blow jobs for instance. It all depends on the person and what they like.
It also depends on who they are having sex with and what point in their life they're at. I never used to get much from blow-jobs and wasn't interested. However, to put it bluntly, my partner does it in a way that blows my mind and he could suck me all day.
Generally, in the summertime, when the wind blows they emit a tone between A and C below middle C.
Re: How do you identify a bottom?
-Easy! Litmus paper up the ass and if it comes out showing a high alkaline content, you're in.
You'd think gay men would be a little bit more enlightened and informed about sex than your run of the mill straight Neanderthal man.
And you'd be wrong.
Keep up the good work, morons.
I'm a bottom and I'm not sure there's any way to tell until you get to the bedroom. I've been surprised so many times that I've stopped trying to predict it by mannerisms or "butchness" factor alone.
Depending on the situation, asking "what do you like to do in bed?" should give you the answer you're looking for. I don't think that's crude necessarily, just direct. I agree there is a bit of a stigma admitting you're a bottom (partly because of the attitudes shown on this thread), but usually people will admit to being versatile, which at least gives you a clue.
And it's funny, I'm about 6'1" and in my experience taller guys are more likely to be bottoms than shorter guys. It seems to be a real turn-on for shorter guys to top someone bigger.
Check behind the ears for ankle marks.
So you take guys home without discussing what you'll be doing once you get there? Do you talk to them at all?
What R10 says. And if he gives you any trouble, just tell him, short people got no reason to live, let alone top.
Energy, intuition will perhaps lead you to believe someone wants you inside them. Whether they exclusively want to bottom for you is unfortunately something you should let time tell you rather than bringing it up on first meeting, date or encounter.
Or you could just go online where it seems different rules apply and everyone tells what they want sexually pre-hook up. Still, isn't it more fun to meet someone, seduce them and see where it goes.
Ask if he has pics of himself on his phone or Grindr...if there are mostly ass pics, there you go.
The brown stains on his pants.
1. Gay Voice
3. Large female social base
4. Shyness and intimidation around overtly masculine heterosexual males (Truck drivers, hunters, heavy metal music etc.)
I look for the prolapsed rectum trailing behind them when they walk.
Four Drinks = Bottom
I a bottom and feel like I need to label myself as verse just to get the most interest. I lust want someone who wants to get some nice oral and fuck me good. I'm not looking for someone on a power trip.
[quote]Being 5'7, I've literally had no choice but to be a bottom.
Sometimes the man has to climb for the man to go into the man.
I like the power trips
I've met many top Asians ^ many bottom muscular whites. Stereotypes are for inexperienced queens
It doesn't matter if the guy is tall or muscular, but if he wants to be a bottom, he has to have some sugar in his personality.
Butch bottoms are GROSS!
R49 = Fem Bottom
This thread is making me HORNY AS HELL!
No one would have to ask we bring back the hanky codes.
[quote][R55], do his wife and kids know?
Danny Pino's plain wife knows that her husband is a pass-around cumtart, but he is still waiting for the right moment to break the news to his kids.
I converted to bottomism in my mid-thirties.
"How do you identify a bottom?"
I identify mine with ear tags, just like I identify other livestock. They whine a bit while you put the tag through the ear, but if you convince them it's a fashion that's "all the rage in London this year", they'll take to it just fine.
(left) park sex top
(right) park sex bottom
No wonder old guys can't get laid. Nobody wants a 40 year old bottom.
Follow the trail of lube.
He opens his ass and a purse falls out.
By his dental records.
Melinda Warner, MD, Medical Examiner
How do I identify a bottom? Their ass tastes like cock!
I like it when a guy forces me, makes me give it up, makes me hurt and laughs.
Bottoms are usually more "thirsty" to hook up believe me. The more eager and "thirsty" they are, the more they like to bottom. Also height doesn't mean shit! I'm 6'1 and a bottom queen! I ignore short bottoms that give me that "bottom wants dick look" like they're a Gypsie in Europe begging on the sidewalk with crooked feet.
Bottoms are the best, I'm also not a fan of versatiles, even when they're happy to bottom. There's just something sexier about a guy who only gets fucked.
I like strict bottoms only.
The one with a penis in his rectum.
They love female music and movies
Why don't you just wear a name tag on your shirts that say, "Top" or "Bottom." Then all the Tops can go on the left side of the bar and all the Bottoms to the right side of the bar and then you can all check each other out and then pair up. Problem solved.
You're going to someone's home for sex and you can't just ask them if they're a bottom?
Look at me
He'd be the guy wiping his ass with a wet wipe, very gingerly.
I love being the bitch, being forced and roughed up.
If he's not up for it then I get to top
I love it when it hurts
They do a lot of squats on the gym, and are bold enough to use the butt exercise machine, which no other dudes even go near.
I wear tight shorts, does that make me a bottom?
By seeing how quickly he gets into his flip-flops after curtain call.
Flips flops means straight to me. Are straight boys all bottoms in waiting?
I identify as a libertarian fucktard bottom
They have conservative morals and hang out in the men's bathroom.
Libertarians troll the bottom of the barrels.
The bottom is the guy on his belly holding his ass cheeks apart.
Ask him when fleet week is if he replies -"i dunno but they are on sale at target" you got a winner.
If you are in a bar, put your hand on his ass. If he doesn't back away,
put your hand down the back of his pants and finger his hole. If he likes it, he's a bottom.
Of course, you have to talk to him first and establish that he might be interested.
Sometimes you don't.
The Palestinian territories are all bottoms.
I've never had any problem meeting hung tops and I'm not even particularly attractive.
I'm a nasty old stoop whore and I get more big cocks up my hole than I know what to do with!
I've never had problems identifying bottoms. They practically scream it with their body language. Then again, I'm a bottom magnet.
Ask him if he's a Republican. If he says yes, he's a guaranteed bottom.
Just lighten things up OP and flippantly ask if you can stick your hoo hoo up his ha ha.
Mix it up.
I like to bottom, how to identify? i like to ride a thick cock and dogie and taking care of a top. i like service tops.
tight pants is a good way and taking selfies of their behind
He's sitting on your dick.
I can usually spot a bottom, not because they act fem or anything. Bottoms have this "FUCK ME HARD" look in their eyes :)
I'm Asian. Everyone assumes I'm a bottom.
>>If you are in a bar, put your hand on his ass. If he doesn't back away, put your hand down the back of his pants and finger his hole. If he likes it, he's a bottom.
>>Of course, you have to talk to him first and establish that he might be interested.
Best advice I've heard here in a long time...
It's been my experience that bottoms more often make the first move. Whether it's true or not, there's a widely held opinion that there are more gay bottoms than tops (this doesn't account for versatiles, of course), which makes bottoms more competitive while tops can hang back and have their pick.
In short, don't be the one to make the approach, OP.
"I only top".
For me it's the exact opposite. I'm looking for a top.
I don't know that you do, but in bar conversation complimenting him with "i'd sure like to fuck you" and he squeals with pleasure and it isn't a turnoff, then he's yours.
R102, if you're the one on 13th Street with the gray hair, the guy in the donut shop has eyes for you! I heard him telling the dishwasher about you ..."the dude has great hair for days."
A certain mister Robert Wagner at a slightly younger age. Do you spot a top or a bottom? Just curious...
You ask them - "Can I fuck your hot bubble butt?"
An enthusiastic YES is usually a good indicator.
By the smell.
No no no
The stigma some of you mention might come from wrapping ones sexual identity in what is essentially a sex position. Saying I *am* a top or I *am* a bottom reduces one to an object as opposed to I like/prefer to top or I like/prefer to bottom, which maintains some semblance of humanity.