Faux Spiritual people are almost as bad fundamentalists.
One of my coworkers is so fucking annoying. Her FB is all Neale Donald Walshe and other happy horseshit. She'll call me outside to look at the clouds. She is a terrible employee and today when I called her out on her constant lateness she said "I don't want to own this." She's seriously selfish but since she occasionally quotes "The Buddha" or whatever bullshit she's into that day, it's okay, or something. Anyone else know a narcissistic asshole who's into new age?
Carol, who wanted to do reikki on my aunt who was suffering from cancer. It was presented as a favor and "a gift." My aunt took her up on it and Carol wanted 100 dollars when she finished. I told her to go fuck herself
Are the barely out of their teens or something? Who would not want to "own" the fact that they run late to work? What does that even mean, really?
She's 50. In her 50 years she's basically learned to be selfish. She drives me fucking bananas. She'll whine and complain all day and whenever someone else worries about something she says, "That's not your fate." If one of us bitches, she says, "Negative energy takes too much energy." or "You're attracting the negative." Today I said it to her and she's been skulking around and hiding. I think I discovered the secret
Oh, I'm the OP at R3. Her son just joined the marines, I can only imagine as a total fuck you to his lame mom.
[quote]Anyone else know a narcissistic asshole who's into new age?
Yes, my cousin, the most self-centred person I know.
Due to the nature of most New Age beliefs, New Age bullshit attracts a lot of narcissists. New Age crap reinforces their self-obsession.
Nice. I wonder what else "not wanting to own this." can get you out of.
I think you are on to something, OP, when you ingeniously threw her own philosophy back to her, i.e. "You're attracting this negativity".
You can always just say something like, 'Well, if your Higher Self can't get to work on time, it doesn't seem to 'high' to me."
The New Age demographic is a fascinating one. I've been drawn to various 'healing' modalities and crossed paths with some incredibly humble and well meaning people who really 'walk the walk'.
And then there's that demographic that holds weekend events that cost a month's rent who seems to draw the most entitled, self involved narcissists. I sense a lot of them really do want to change, but only if it's quick and easy and doesn't require too much effort.
I shouldn't paint too broad a brushstroke, though, as I've found amazing people in all areas of New Age life.
(And the irony is not lost on me that I can be a total a-hole at times even when I am truly trying to clean up my crap and be one of the 'nice' guys out there. I really admire those people who 'walk the walk' and aspire to be one of them.)
"I don't want to own this" is her way of rewriting the past. She's claiming that it was one of her requirements for working there, to toddle in at 11. No, in reality, she said she'd like for us to open up at 8 (with her opening) to increase business. Her lateness is poisonous to the other staff who also all now roll in around 11. So it's a combination of those two things.
OP, your focus on your coworker is what troubles you. If you look to others for fulfillment, you will never be truly fulfilled.
No, these faux "spiritual" people are NOT as bad as the fundies, because the fundies want to force the whole world to follow their stupid rules.
New agey spiritual types wouldn't dream of forcing other people to follow their beliefs! Of course that's because they're too self-absorbed to care what other peoople believe, but it's still a big improvement.
Frankly, OP, it sounds like you DO need to spend some time looking at clouds.
Sounds like just another cubefrau variant.
Some love to hate someone else / others / themselves / something / everything.
With hate as main focus there's no place for love and genuine positive experiences. All you receive are cheap thrills from power play maneuvers that one day will come back to haunt you.
OP, you believe that things or people make you unhappy, but this is not accurate. You make yourself unhappy.
A woman who after spending 45 minutes bitching about her landlord (a former cop who lives above her basement apartment) calling the cops on her (30 minutes into her tirade it comes out that he smelled her smoking pot) will say "I'm such a positive person, I can't stand people who complain about a life, life is such a gift!"
I've talked shit about her here before. She thought a realistic plan for finding a place to live would be "A person who has a small house that they don't need to charge rent on, I could have a garden and a little yard, I'm almost 40, I deserve that." For free apparently.
Now she's moving out west with some hippie she recently met who's homeless and unemployed (but they want to adopt a baby, has to be a baby together) She sent out a text spam the other night announcing that she needed "Movers, a truck, some money and a place to live for a few weeks while we wait on checks, if this strikes you as nervy, I'm not really sorry, you have to make your intentions known to the universe and you friends, you are my universe." Fucking amazing.
When you judge another, you do not define them, you define yourself.
I've met just as many hypocritical, self centred people into new-age as I have Christian or Muslim fundies. What seems worse is that they think they are above that type of bullshit.
I've looked at clouds from both sides now. From up and down, and still somehow. It's cloud illusions I recall. I really don't know clouds at all.
If someone says things like "Sedona is an energy vortex, it's a proven fact" "I just had to take 30 minutes for myself after his massage, just to rid myself of the negative energy."
More than 3 self help books on their shelves.
Anyone who believes in crystals.
These people will borrow money, never to pay it back and when you complain that they're not paying it back will say something like "You're so materialistic. They'll fuck your boyfriend, they'll fuck your girlfriend, they'll move in their girlfriend who won't pay rent. They'll say they need to "go on a sabbatical of volunteering" and dump their dog somewhere. Faux spiritual people are the worst.
r16 is still looking for movers, a truck, some money, and a place to live, apparently.
R11, I do look at the clouds. What I don't do is skip inside like a spaz and grab someone's hand (yes, she's grabbed a customer's hands before) and drag them outside to look at clouds. I don't announce some horseshit "fact" about the percentage of people who look at clouds and try to paint myself as a more enlightened person because I do look at clouds.
I worked for a company where the owners were that way. Such bullshit. They would burn some shit every morning to "cleanse the energy" but all it did was stink up the place. We were allowed to listen to music but there was a list of forbidden artists who were deemed too negative and toxic for the workplace (with two of my faves, Joy Division and The Smiths topping the list) The last straw for me was when we were expected to come in on our day off and have our charts done. Most of us were college grads, many with a science background. Why the hell would we want to waste our time on such bullshit? When I pointed out to the astrologer that the stars that made up my chart were in most cases many many light years away and in a different part of the sky on the day I was born, thereby making the whole thing irrelevant, I was accused of not having an open mind (apparently believing in some ancient hocus-pocus and disregarding modern science is keeping an open mind) . I stayed there about a year, mostly to pump up my resume then bolted as soon as something better came along. About a year later they went bankrupt. Somehow their physic advisers and crystal balls must have been faulty the day they asked it, "is our business plan a sound one?"
The Course In Miracles clan is fun - they like to absolve themselves of personal responsibility. No blame for shitty behavior.
My father's friends. They all lived in a commune in the 70s but have lots of money now. They read Eckhart Tolle to each other and talk about the good old days. I went to that commune. One guy was in a diaper and had a baby bottle. He was going through primal and would comment on his farts. ("All I had was some brown rice...I wonder where that came from.) Another guy was a drunken poet who was just looking for a crash. He would be dropped off some nights and wouldn't even make it to the front door. There was a blonde lady with dark underarm hair who used to handle the household accounts and shop for the veggies. Oh it was precious. And they were all such big hypocrites. Still are. Narcissistic, Perpetual student/seekers. They were supposed to be our future. And now they make software for dating sites in Santa Clarita.
R15, I remember that thread. Thanks for reminding us of it.
I was a member of an email group called Freecycle a few years ago. I used it as a way to clean out a houseful of furniture left in a rental house.
There were people on that list who would post things like: I need a reliable car to drive the 16 miles each way to my job every day. Please, it must be in good running order, because I don't know how to work on cars and can't afford to pay for mechanical repairs.
Or: I need someone to mow my lawn every week. If someone wants to give me a lawnmower that works, I could do it myself, but I'd rather have someone else do it.
And I can't count the number of times someone posted that they'd had a fire or a divorce or something and had lost everything and were desperate for a long list of items, so I would email them and offer a dining table or dog house or whatever I had that was on the list, and then they would either not show up for the appointment or they'd take one look at the item and say, "Oh, that's not my style," or "That's too old."
R24, so vividly repulsive a picture you paint. And believable. :/
The woman I mentioned in R15 just called to borrow money (she already owes me over $200) and said "I'm desperate for $300 but I'll settle for $200." I told her there was no way I could give her any more money. She told me "That's okay, it all comes out in the wash eventually, I deserve it, the universe will provide it, that's how I've always lived."
Just a dumb animal, like most of us. Poor cow: handless, hopeless, helpless.
Tries to be a little smart, dropping the God for a jaunty 'Universe'--sad lady.
R27 That is so crazy! And I don't know about anyone else, but I would be mortified if I had to go around and beg for a measly $300! I mean, its one thing to need a loan for several thousand dollars. Thats understandable, not everyone has that laying around. But three fucking hundred dollars!?!?!?! Shit, if I emptied all the change jars here, went through the car and looked under the cushions, I could probably scare that up. Christ, she really has no shame or self respect.
My sister is always saying, "I'm not religious but I am SPIRITUAL".
And I'm not violent but I am vengeful
I meet a surprising number of gay men--intelligent, educated men, usually in the arts, in NYC--who are New Agers. And based on my experience, I view them much as I view fundamentalist Christians or any orthodox religious types....
Thank you, but no. We have no common ground and nothing to discuss. I am a creature of reason, and you are ruled by whimsy, romance, and sky fairies.
R28, now that you've mentioned "the jaunty universe in place of God" it's all I can think of. She IS AS BAD A FUNDAMENTALIST! It's like 4 or 5 times a day at least that she mentions the fucking universe.
Plus the other annoying shit such as "If there's one thing I've gained through my years it's wisdom and I'm finally smart enough to know that I have to live for me and me alone." Yes, b/c all indications are that you've been selfish as shit since you could talk.
Oh and this morning when she called in to say she was "moving slow this morning" she asked in the most faux sympathetic tones..."Are you feeling alright? Because yesterday you looked really tired and this morning, I don't know, you just sound, really down or something." I said "I'm just really busy, so next time just call in if you're going to be on time or early."
I have a fb friiend like this. It rains and she posts "thank you to the gods of rain". Wtf. She also begs for money. It started out that her son was autistic and she needed a car to get him to dr appointments. Then her electric was getting shut off and she needed money for that. She was going to lose her Internet service at one point, but somehow manages to post updates 20 times a day. Now she is getting evicted, and she and her son are going to be homeless if someone doesn't help. I do feel bad, and would love to help for the sake of the poor son, but some people are just walking disasters and no amount of money will change that.
The Shirley Maclaine bio thread reminded me of this bump
OP, Thanks for this thread, and the sensible analysis. I've tried really hard to "get" this spiritual stuff, and understand what sounded like "mumbo-jumbo." Glad to know I'm not the only one going, WTF?
[quote]...and when you complain that they're not paying it back will say something like "You're so materialistic.
So true. I know a new age therapist/healer and I've had to bail him out a couple of times, financially. When he wants to hit below the belt in his passive-aggressive way, he calls me a "materialist." I'm not sure why. I live in a small apartment, have one car, live fairly within my means. He has two homes, two cars (just sold two), mountains of debt, and a, um, higher calling.
Most of these people will never find the gumption to study physics. It's all really a defense mechanism produced by the brain craving to be a member of an elite group. These people lack the discipline needed to achieve substantial, tangible goals so they pacify themselves with beliefs concerning the unknown. Lift off their covering and you will find a fractured, damaged soul. It is part of human nature so just write them off and wish them well.
OP, why is this woman still employed?
I give an exception to the gays because many have been rejected by the churches. They have nowhere else to go. And usually, they are not the most offensive ones.
Straight new-agers have no excuses and the hetero-male new-ager is usually a pedophile or guilty of embezzling.
The straight female new-agers have been rejected by men so much that they need some kind of spiritual comforting that mainstream religion can't give them. Or, they use the new-age beliefs as an excuse to be promiscious, like Shirley Maclaine.
keepin' it real
The worst is fucking Oprah - she pushed Mariann Williamson, Deepack Chopra and all these spiritual people down our throats...bitch please if you were really that spiritual you would give all your money away and live in a box...
It's called happy horseshit! Thanks...I'm pretty sure these people are clearly insane.
So true, R43,
For all of her good works she almost negates them with her channelers and fake guru shit.
I'll say this again: channeling brings in demons. As does yoga. Some meditation does as well.
I am not a freeper or a fundamentalist. I am just an observer of people and society.
And these dmeons like to hide behind nice faces like Marianne Willimason and others.
I just want to add that the "yoga pants" are okay, and don't attract demons, just horny devils!
What's so odd is the attraction that lesbians have for anything native american, even going so far as to smoking those gall-danged stinky native american cigarettes.
the hold in farts and therefore are products of the devil.
Mormons actually do not apply their rules to non-Mormons.
If you don't fire that fucking cunt, OP, YOU need to "own" that you're an asshole.
When I get into a yoga habit, I feel calmer and more limber. Less demonic than usual, really.
Get the fuck over it.
A friend of ours used to rent from a lesbian. Very "spiritual". They met at one of these holistic-healing-Birkenstock-birdseed-vegan meetups. She is an artist. All warm and fuzzy, touchy-feely. Lots of self-help book.
He was diagnosed with cancer (he was long-term HIV positive) in January. In April, she told him he had to move because he:
- fell ill and had to be rushed to the hospital. She didn't want someone that sick as a tenant.
- fell asleep at some point from the medication and left a candle burning or some such thing. Thought he was a danger.
She insisted he be out by the end of April. Well, we moved him at the beginning of May. Into a nursing home. Bitch never came to see him. He was dead two weeks later.
She managed to show up after he died insisting he owed her rent and money to clean up the place. One of the last things he did was make sure he paid his bills and we left that place cleaner than it was when he moved in.
We told her "too bad", there was no money. There wasn't, my partner was his legal power of attorney and we were both medical power of attorney. And then said, "Fuck you, you cunt".
My friend's ex posts all this love and light horseshit on her FB page, but I know she is the most narcissistic twat that ever twatted. She even managed to make World AIDS Day all about herself because she once did a benefit for AMFAR or some such.
I laugh out loud at her self-conscious PR attempts, but plenty of people buy into it.
They'll always come up to you and act concerned that you "Look tired, is something wrong, you just don't seem like yourself today." As if they give a shit. It's beyond just passive aggressive.
If you meet a President Ikeda buddhist or a Landmark Forum graduate...run fast run far.
A friend of mine did Landmark and recommended it to me. Is Landmark that bad?
Alanis sent these types up in "Eight Easy Steps".
While I do find these people annoying, I still hate the fundies more. At least these bozos aren't gleefully anti-gay.
Oh and mine has been clogging up my FB feed all week with pleas to pick her up from the airport (on Christmas) and today she asked to borrow a car for the week. She also has made it her mission to "educate" people that it's not Jesus' birthday and how she'll be celebrating the Pagan aspects of the holiday. I'm not a Christian and I know Jesus is ripped off from Osiris but she acts like she's the first one to discover this fact. Happy Yule.
My partner had a friend who was like this. The most narcissistic, "look at ME I'm SPIRITUAL" person. Has changed his name and wears a click-clackety mishmash of native-american and Tibetan and Peruvian trinkets/accessories all over himself; that type. A walking cliche of one of the reasons all people do not love San Francisco/Berkeley.
Spiritual Guy and my partner got into a disagreement - and did not speak for a month. Spiritual guy contacts my partner and suggests "a clearing" to resolve the disagreement. My partner dreads it but agrees. It turns out, Spiritual guy's definition of "a clearing" was that he (Spiritual guy) felt a need to "clear some energy" by talking at my partner and rehashing the conflict, at great length and in very manipulative language, but not allowing my partner to speak in response. He said "I feel the need to correct you, this is not a two-way processing, this is a clearing; MY clearing; something *I* need to do."
Real piece of work, this guy. Apparently few people can stay friends with him for very long, and a relationship is quite out of the question. You'd only have to exaggerate him by 20% to create a hilarious bit character on a sitcom. But it would be a character whom the writers can only use sparingly. Very sparingly.
The worst are the ones who go to Mexico for peyote training. Obviously just would be pushers, not real shamans.
I like how if you have something terrible happen to you or a need to kvetch they can't be bothered because it's "all too negative, you're drawing the negative to yourself." But if they get a flat tire they shut down and whine like they lost a limb. I know too many like this.
[quote] "You're attracting the negative."
you are. You some how attracted that flaky bitch as a co-worker
Bumped, because I know from experience that New Age hippies, despite the whole peace/love/positive energy bullshit, are some of the meanest, cold-blooded, unintelligent, humorless, most selfish, entitled spoiled brats I've ever known.
And this is from a former hippie who got tired of all those lazy, brain-damaged dirtbags and their weird sense of entitlement.
How many people do you know who have their financial and personal lives in order and don't exhaust everyone in within a 50 yard radius with their endless unsolvable problems?
How many people do you know who are not profoundly self centered?
How many people do you know who actually have give and take conversations and who demonstrate some simple, uncomplicated interest in other human beings>
I know 2 such people. Both are highly educated cultured and interesting. One is an athiest, the other eclectic in beliefs but [though you would never know it or believe it] is into new age shit.
The selfish assholes I know are mostly xtians
I just think it is rare for people in this culture to be anything but self centered no matter what belief system they hide out in.
I just wanted to update you on one of my most selfish new age type friends. She asked if I would help sell some bracelets that she'd made out of healing stones in my small retail shop (these don't fit into the theme of the store at all, but it was a favor, she's having a hard time and the universe (me) will provide. She brings these shitty little bracelets made of crappy beads and dumps them on the front counter. She tells me to "try and get 50 for them." I told her I didn't think our customers would pay that. She then wanted a check for $300 for the bracelets. I just laughed and tried to explain "retail pricing" and "consignment." She was all pissed and grabbed them up and stormed out. That was yesterday and today she called to say "consignment would be okay but I'd need 30% up front."
I would feel sorry for her but bitch spends her money on the stupidest things. I'm not saying the poor should live in misery but maybe without the latest iPhone and 8 restaurant meals a week?
Today my faux spiritual coworker was late as hell and I did all of her morning duties which aren't even close to my job just so the place wouldn't fall apart. We'd discussed her lateness a few days ago and I said "What happened to your promises from Friday?" she replied, "I don't even know what to say to that." I said "How about a thank you for covering for me this morning? I noticed you posted a bunch of attitudes of gratitude on your FB page, how about making an effort to do that in real life too?"
She just went for a walk to "clear her head". I can't wait for the bullshit she'll spout when she returns from her "journey."
I think we all just hate each other, honestly.
You could weed out various problematic beliefs (and non-beliefs) until you have only one person left. Because that would be the population number at which someone isn't going to hate another person for even one different opinion.
There's a lot of that in Northern California. I'm actually drawn to new age philosophies but every time I try to go to a meditation group or yoga class, I'm turned off by the pretentiousness and hypocrisy of it all.
I've worked with a few people who were over the top new agey. One in particular claimed to be a Buddhist and was always judging other people. She would always call people out on being "negative" and comment on how she had to shelter herself from that energy. She's the type that would constantly go on Facebook tangents only to delete them a few hours later.
"Witches" are the worst. I had a friend who considered himself a "witch" and he was just insufferable. Endlessly casting aspersions on everyone else's choices in life, talking your ear off about how self-actualizing he was, and boring the world with stories about the "spells" he was casting. In clubs he single out someone he fuond attractive, and then go dance next to him, later saying "I put a spell on him"--obviously a repellent spell, because nothing ever came of it. (Except, perhaps, the guy in question having stories to tell his friends about the weird middle-aged guy in a skirt who danced next to him, waving his arms like he was brain-damaged.)
This thread reminds me of Michfesters and "woo."
No, r69, I respectfully disagree, there's an actual pattern here. The most self-absorbed people, bar none, are fodder for those Landmark forum assholes -- and, almost to the one, more selfish than ever the more they get into the latest New Age "Secret". They pay thousands of dollars but never ask anyone a question in conversation unless/until they need something and then wonder why the world isn't dying to help.
I worked with dozens in the movie biz, needless to say, all women and all so selfish it was impossible to ignore. In personal life, yeah who cares, is easier to stay away. But one thing I noticed and it's when I said "no more" as far as working with them, starting with one awful female director (now pretty much run out of the biz, surprise surprise): they spew all this positive energy but they never EVER err on the side of generosity. Especially to those who have helped them. Disgusting.