Commercials you're hating right now, Part 2

Because the first thread was full. I find the new Verizon commercial loathsome. A mother and daughter are lamenting that the daughter is moving out. They are crying so much (and so dreadfully artificially) that there are subtitles. How do advertisers not understand such a commercial is so repulsive?

• The "lot-T" commercial that makes a big deal out of simple math.

  Datalounge 1.62 percent

• That Axion guy is hot but that's just so the fat slobs the commercial is aimed at can "identify" and will buy the underarm shit. Like someone wants their tired old doodles! AS IF!

• ANY commercial where people dance around with the project that the advertisement is peddling, especially in office settings where they dance on the desks like complete idiots because they just ate a chocolate bar or something. It makes me embarrassed to be a human being.

• project = product there, sorry

  r3

• The borderline porn Liquid Plumr ad because those two guys seem way gay and I'd rather they visit me.

• Aw, r3; those old Doritos commercials with Chris Elliot and office dancing were great! "Tax refund?!" "No, not really!"

• That horrid McDonald's commercial is back, the one with the bitchy woman telling her boyfriend/husband that she HATES him because he bought himself some McDonald's drink with mint. I don't even know what the drink is, Mint Coffee? The commercial is so obnoxious and annoying I don't even know what the damn product is. The actress has severe carbface, she looks like a former Prom Queen who ends up obese. "MINT!" I want to strangle that woman when she says that. Someone needs to do a parody clip with the guy poring an entire scalding hot pot of the mint coffee over her carb head!

• Those new Walgreens commercials, with "Down On The Corner" playing in the background, and that beyond-annoying, squeaky voice-over guy who sounds like a neutered Kevin Costner.

  Anonymous

• The voiceover on the Walgreen's ad is done by John Corbett, formerly of "Northern Exposure" and probably better known to DL posters, as one of Carrie's boyfriend's on "SATC". IIRC, Aiden was a furniture designer. John Corbett as been doing those Walgreen's voiceovers for about a year.

• That's my boy Charlie Finn in that McDonald's spot, r7. He was in the movie Super Troopers. His funny line was "I need a cheeseburger – it's for a cop!"

• r7 Nothing is more obnoxious than McDonald's coffee commercials. Do you guys remember the one a few years ago with that fucking asshole hipster guy who apparently can't even speak a nice word until he has coffee but never bought a coffee maker for his house? His roomie tells him good morning but dickhead pulls the snotty, "Not until I've had my coffee," and even puts his hand up. He ignores the guy walking the dog and even snarls at the counter girl at McDonald's. Like, really asshead? You walk up to the counter to place an order but don't want to talk to the girl till you've had your coffee? Then back the fuck up and let someone else order. I hate that guy with a passion and I hope he gets shit when he's out and about in LA. I would refuse to do such a dickish commercial.

• A diaper commercial - Luvs? that shows a woman with her first kid, all covered up nursing in public (disgusting) THEN flashes ahead to her nursing the 2nd kid - and she snaps at a server in a restaurant, "eyes up here!" You can just about see her fucking breast! beyond DISGUSTING! (I'm female, btw) I don't know how that fucking commercial aired!

• The 5-Hour Energy commercial is horrible and totally unprofessional. Was it a home video? Want to know what I did in the last 5 hours? I was a housekeeper, a cook, a housekeeper, a sanitation engineer (seriously, bitch?), a housekeeper (okay, we get it, you clean a lot). I take back anything bad I said about the 5-Hour debut album guy. PLEASE bring him back!

• What ? Noone has mentioned Prolia yet ????

  Break a leg

• That Kraft cheese commercial with the jingle "I woke up to a new day Every little thing gonna go my way" And so on. It's a catchy enough little jingle but they seem to run it like every 5 minutes. So sick of it.

• I just saw a commercial about some frozen stuff that looks like tater tots and has a bunch of "cute" kids arranging the stuff in funny faces and popping that shit into their mouths as they twinkle at the camera. If that isn't bad enough, they also use plinky plunky banjo music for the background with some insipid female singing in a cutesy style. Nothing irritates me more than cute music in a commercial, especially if moppets are involved. Bah!

• Those Slim-Full commercials, with the bizarre, whispy little woman rotating her torso from left to right and dressed very strangely. Has anyone seen those? She's wearing this bizarre outfit, little sandals, a messy hairdo, 20lbs soaking wet. Everything about those commercials is bizarre to me. They're obviously very low budget but still..

• Link to said commercial.

  http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/slimfull

  R17

• I hate with a passion the Samsung smart phone commercials that feature the nerd who looks like a young Woody Allen.

• I hate the entire Samsung "Unicorn Apocalypse" campaign with the hipsters and their tech startup. The latest ad emphasizes the "Safe Technology" bundled into whatever phone (Galaxy?), which to me as an iOS user just underlines how inherently non-secure Android must be by default.

• In the NY radio market there's a spot with Michael Bolton complaining that his phone number is one digit off from a cable system's and people keep calling him for service. Trouble is, he sounds pissed off and obnoxious, it's clear the announcer is not the one interviewing him and that they talked him into doing a phone interview. It's a total turnoff to the listener, both for the advertiser and Bolton. It needs to be pulled.

• The whole genre of children telling faux naif stories about how cheese slices or coffee pods are made.

• Yeah I'm sure you're female, R12.

• Why am I hearing this "o heavenly Day" song in every commercial that's on right now?!?

• It's just a story, R11 -- the character isn't a real person.

• Still Leo.

• That Geico commercial with Dikembe Mutombo. His low girggly voice is annoying.

  http://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DC_0fyUYB3cA

• The McDonalds rapping fish - Fish, fish McBites, McBites. I watch tv via streaming media. Frequently there is only one sponsor for a show, so I'll see the same ad over and over and over while watching one episode. I've seen this stupid McDonalds ad dozens of times now. So annoying.

• Target's ads are always bad. The AT&T one with the guy interviewing kids is terrible.

• The "Build Your GUNSMITH career today" ad that keeps showing up on the right hand side of DL.

  Anti gun

• I agree that the stupid Hipster "Unicorn Apocalypse" shit is tiresome, but I'd watch it for 24 hours straight if they would just stop running the FUCKING GEICO ADS! ENOUGH already! The gecko isn't 'cute' or 'edgy' nor does it speak to anyone. It's been done to death. Time for something new.

• That one for one of the cell phone companies where a whole bunch of people are waiting on line to get into the store, and this one hipster's parents walk by and they have the other kind of cellphone. Whoever's paying for this commercial, you're not getting your message across as clearly as you hope, not even the 28th time someone looks at it.

• [quote]The "Build Your GUNSMITH career today" ad that keeps showing up on the right hand side of DL. Pay the $18 and never see it again. [quote]That one for one of the cell phone companies where a whole bunch of people are waiting on line to get into the store, and this one hipster's parents walk by and they have the other kind of cellphone. Those are Samsung ads as well. They depict people lining up to get the newest iPhone, when people with the latest super-cool Samsung Galaxy saunter up and display "advanced features" the iPhone couldn't yet dream of. Of course, these are technologies that aren't really mature yet, such as NFC, and there's a reason Apple has yet to implement them. Samsung phones are cheap and appeal to a less tech-savvy clientele. (Nothing against Android per se: the Nexus 4 made by LG is a *great* phone. Just hating Samsung.)

• I hate the one with Arthur Godfrey selling Axion pre-soak.

• Those "on the corner of happy and healthy" Walgreens commercials are so grating. If you know anything about chain store economics, you know that the last thing Walgreens and CVS and Rite Aid are concerned about is the well being of their customers. They just want to keep us as pumped full of drugs as they can. Health and happiness are beside the point.

• r10 I love that movie and that guy! Don't spit in that cop's burger..and don't say shenanigans. R25 I know it's just a story but it offends me that the marketing genius of McDonald's would even think that would be appealing to coffee drinkers..like we are all such assholes and totally get why the guy acts like that. Do they not know that people who are really into good coffee buy it and grind it and make it at home?

  r11

• I no longer buy Cheerios because I've come to hate their ditty, "the one and only Cheerio's" I cringe everytime I hear that prepubescent sounding voice sing that line.

• I totally agree r37. And not just the little girlish voice on that fucking Cheerios ad but also in a couple car commercials lately. It sounds like the girl that sings "Sunny Came Home" and that whole style just irritates me. Also the new claritin (I think) commercial with Al Bundy's voice and a whistled jingle..it's on HLN all the time and it's so grating.

• The Everest College commercial where the chubette says, "If I wouldn't have went to college ..." It grates on my ears so badly I have to hit the mute button when I hear the first few lines.

• r39 They definitely target those commercials to a black audience and I'm not even black and find it offensive. The one with the black guy in jeans and ball cap saying, "You sit on your couch every day and you don't get nothing done, call Everest, you at home anyhow." Ok, I can see it did you a world of good.

• I third those Walgreens "On the corner of such and such" commercials - the copy is so stupid. I also can't stand the new one that's running constantly with the geeky kid who's hiking with his father and telling him how his phone is getting as strong an internet signal as their internet at home or something. I want to smack that annoying know-it-all with his tilted head and his squeaky voice.

• I miss the old style commercials where women were driven mad with passion because a man has Brylcreem in his hair or is wearing Hai Karate. And the woman is waiting at the door for hubby when he gets home because it's going to be an Aviance night.

  Curlers%20In%20Your%20Hair%3F%20Shame%20On%20You%21%20

• Thanks for the reminder, R41. No voice is as annoying as John Corbett's "aw, shucks"y bleating.

• That one where the girl climbs to the top of the mountain. I have to turn the volumn down when that obnoxious woman whaling 'someone left the door' idiot song starts.

• Those fucking incontinent bears addicted to toilet paper continue to air. And the woman wanting to fuck the Geico pig.

• R45 I don't use that brand of toilet paper on purpose, because of the bears. But there's an even more obnoxious one starring a bunch of different Everywomen. The first one starts out with something like "Can we talk shit?" Oh, it's so bad.

• The corner of Healthy & Happy ads' clueless young dad is cute and pings to high heavens. The NYC Lord & Taylor shoe ad that's running has a dance-y catchy song that I would almost download called "You'll Feel Amazing" by West Coast band Radical Something.

• In whispery baby voice .."coupons.com"

• The Fiat 500s cliff-diving and swimming to Pitbull's "Sexy People."

• Zoosk. I don't want an ugly red heart making all my dating decisions for me.

• The more I see that redhead on the Wendy's commercial, the more I hope a truck runs her over at the end of the ad.

• I like for the PopeYes bitch to beat down simpering Wendy. I'd say to the TV, "Now THAT'S better!"

• Is Wendy a big gayhater like her father?