Can someone tell me what it is like to be bisexual?

I'm really confused. What is it about having some level of sexual attraction to both genders that seems to mysterious?

I think I have an extra difficulty telling the difference between men and women because I find members of both gender attractive. It definitely isn't the first thing I notice after realizing I find someone hot.

I'm a bi woman and have always found both men and women sexually attractive. I simply like the bodies of both and the sexual energy. I have no confusion and never had any.

Emotionally, I'm only attracted to men, though.

You're going to get a lot of bi women answering this question. My impression is the answer to your question is very, very different for women and men.

OP... there's a whole spectrum. Assuming you mean "equally bisexual" (Kinsey 3, rather rare), it would be like you not caring if someone were blond or brunette. You notice. You appreciate the hair or hair color. But you don't care which one it is. It's just... different.

Meanwhile others only date blonds, or only are turned on by brunettes.

That's probably the best way to think about it.

r4 I keep reading and hearing that and still not convinced it's true or at least entirely true. I think indoctrination and norms make it harder for men to have sex with other men. The concept of what makes a man "a man" and masculine, are way more rigid for men than for women. Masculine identity (and straight identity which for many is one and the same) is really threatened if a man has sex with another man while I don't believe it's so for women (or at least most).

Sometimes you feel like a cook, sometimes you don't.

"I think I have an extra difficulty telling the difference between men and women"

Understandable these days, but I would think the tits would be a good clue.

[quote]I just want to know what bisexuals feel.

Isn't it obvious?

I think R5's hair analogy was fairly good.

Personally, I tend to be attracted to a lot of the same things in men and women (with a few differences) and tend to be attracted to androgyny. But I know of bisexuals for whom that is not the case at all.

I'm a bisexual woman that is attracted to almost every type of person. Feminine women, soft butch women, masculine men....just not super butch women and super feminine men. So, basically...what R7 said.

I consider myself gay, but when I tell people what I like they always tell me I'm bisexual. I have had sex with me and with women and have had relationships with both and am attracted to both, but I don't really like being penetrated by a man. I find it very painful and it might have something to do with me not being in control which I don't like.

"I just want to know what bisexuals feel."

Anyone we can!

I'm a bisexual man and I tend to prefer very masculine men, and feminine/androgynous women. I'm not into vanilla sex but while I really enjoy and really love kink and consensual BDSM it's not always essential.

Simply put if you're sexually attracted to both genders then you're bisexual. You don't have to fall in love with both genders or want relationships with both genders, and you don't have to be sexually experienced in order to be bisexual. It's like how you can be gay and be a complete virgin and you're still gay.

I remember when I first noticed my sexual attraction to both genders and yeah it's a stereotype and cliche but I wanted a male/male/female 3 way. I've had all male 3 ways and those were fun and enjoyable but I'd like to have a MMF 3 way since it's been a fantasy of mine since I was a teenager. At one point I liked the idea of a relationship with both a man and a woman at the same time but I'm not sure if a relationship with more than one person works? I remember dating a gay male couple and they'd invited me into their relationship and it did not last.

I can fall in love with both genders but not all bisexuals can, and currently at this time in my late 20s I've had more relationships and sexual experiences with men. No matter who I date or get into a relationship with I am out about my sexuality.

On the Kinsey Scale and Klein Grid I've gone from being a 3 to a 5, and I'll go back and forth between the two points. I remember being younger and I leaned more towards women.

My ex BF is also a bisexual man and we would talk about our sexuality and we did want a 3 way with another woman or even a 4 way with a male/female couple just to experience them but none of that happened and it was very rare that we even had sex with other men aside from each other.

I am dating a bisexual man and he told me how he's attracted to the person and how their gender does not matter to him when it comes to relationships or sexual attraction.

I know other bisexual men who had periods even years and decades where they thought they were gay or identified as gay but then they discovered that they're bisexual.

I have a bisexual male friend who is now partnered with another bisexual man and neither of them knew about their sexuality until after their wives died but they are a lot older and from a generation that didn't really talk about sex.

no such thing as.....

What's it feel like?

Fuck a melon while sticking a cucumber up your ass.

Problem solved.

I can fall in love with both and enjoy sex with both. I prefer relationships with men because they tend to be less emotionally taxing, but I have fallen hard for both a handful of times. I, also, love getting vaginally fucked by men and giving head to women. I don't like sucking cock or being eaten out by other women. I don't do anal either way.

Non-bisexuals seem to have this weird idea that we're attracted to simply everybody which is ridiculous. We're just attracted to specifics within both genders. And, honestly, there are a few trannies of both stripes who have also turned my head, but I've never had a relationship with one although I wouldn't be averse to it nor to having a relationship with someone who is intersexed.

Frank? is that you @ r17?

How the hell could "Frank" love getting vaginally fucked by men or get eaten out by "other women", R18?

. .. ...

Very similar to being bi-polar which a lot of people on DL can relate to

bump

It’s confusing, OP, and very hard to control. It’s constantly feeling something is missing. I’m currently dating a gay man and I have been fantasying about being with a woman, and although I haven’t acted on it since we started dating, I’m sure I’ll crack sometime soon. My boyfriend is pretty dismissive of the subject, which is, oddly, the reason we have lasted this long. Most guys and women I’ve dated have gone on an envy rampage no matter what I did. Living in a threesome sounds ideal to me, but it’s not going to happen.

First off, bisexuals don't rule the night. They don't rule it. Nobody does. And they don't run in packs. And while they may not be as strong as apes, don't lock eyes with 'em, don't do it. Puts 'em on edge. They might go into berzerker mode; come at you like a whirling dervish, all fists and elbows. You might be screaming "No, no, no" and all they hear is "Who wants cake?" Let me tell you something: They all do. They all want cake.

[quote]I just want to know what bisexuals feel.

Horny.

It's when you like the hole and the pole.

I am a married man who is very much in love with my wife. I am attracted to women and men and have been in relationships with both. My best emotional relationships (3)have been with women and with the exception of 1, my best sex has been with men who I have been in semi-long term relationships with (2). My wife knows that I am occasionally turned on by both sexes but I am faithful to her. When I feel the need, I watch both straight and gay porn, depending on what I'm feeling. My relationship with my wife is more important to me than having casual sex with another man/woman. She has asked me to be committed to her both emotionally and sexually. I don't feel I'm giving up so much, I feel that I have gained so much more because she's a special person.

I'm one of the people who are 100% homosexual and 100% heterosexual, with no preference. Femaleness and maleness is part of what makes a person, so I can't say it doesn't matter, but it's like being from the city or the suburbs, it has an impact on who you are/how you're formed, but has nothing to do with whether I'm attracted to you or if I'd date you.

Interesting comments. Quite a few of the bisexual responses seem to be saying that they are emotional/sexually attracted to men or to women, but enjoy sex with the other.

I think of myself as a bisexual man as well. I agree with the poster who said that it's specifics in either sex that attract one. Speaking for myself, I love male faces, their angularity and leanness. However, I am not particularly attracted to their bodies, or hairiness or even their dicks. I enjoy sucking, but have no interest in their butts, nor do I like mine to be played with. I think I am a pretty boring lay when it comes to gay sex - I like being somewhat passive and letting my partner take control. I am lean and quite muscular myself, so I usually find fuckbuddies who are into muscle worship and are willing to let me lie back and just give myself up to their tongues and hands. With women it's more or less the opposite. I like being in control and aggressive. I love curvy women (Scarlett johansson, please call me!) and their smoothness and the sounds they make during sex. Its almost impossible to find women who are willing to tolerate my bisexual tendencies, however, so I have had more relationships with men than women. I once thought that maybe dating a tranny would be the ideal solution, but unfortunately it did absolutely nothing for me. I like the sexes separately. As I get older, I find myself leaning towards women.

you pretend to like women fopr a while and then you just adjust and find a guy.

I agree with the poster who wrote that they were 100% heterosexual and 100% homosexual. That is how I feel too. I don't feel divided.

I am a bisexual female who has slept with few people (5 total) and who has had longterm relationships with both men and women (separately).

I am emotionally and physically attracted to both sexes. When I am out of a painful relationship with one gender, however, I have noticed that I tend to veer in the other direction the next time round. Maybe it's part of the healing process i.e. I finished a 14+ year lesbian relationship a couple of years back, and I find myself exclusively attracted to men at the present. I remember the opposite happening with a longterm heterosexual relationship as well.

I don't seem to be able to be emotionally/romantically attracted to both genders at the same time; it seems to alternate for me.

When you look at a photo of a woman blowing a man and you're not sure if you want to be him so she would be blowing you, or if you want to be her so you would be blowing him - than you're bisexual

I can sort of relate to that, R33. When I see a hot guy I think of what I'd like to do to him - with a woman I think of what I'd like her to do to me. I'm gay, because I'm not really into women's bits, but I like seeing women dominating men and would love to be forced into a CFNM situation.

It's sexy time all the time when you're bisexual!

If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die?

I'm a bisexual female, an it's easy.. I get turned out by both sexes. It really isn't that mysterious. I have a leaning towards men though, but I do feel attracted to women too, and I have been in relationships with both men and women.

Bisexual female here. Agree with R32 that attraction seems to alternate. I was in a committed 8-year relationship with a woman, but after that I slept with a fair amount of men and enjoyed it. Lately I have been swinging more towards the ladies.

Generally though I lean towards women, as the emotional and sexual payoff is bigger for me. I do have specific types though: I prefer my men waifish and my ladies femme.

But it's different for everyone, there's no obviously 'correct' way to be bisexual, and it's a myth that if you have preferences it must mean your are in denial.

For me, it is absolutely nothing like R23 describes.

But R23 is a good example of why people tend to think bisexuals are a bad bet, romantically.

Like others here, I'm bisexual but monogamous (also could be considered as "alternating between genders," I guess). I would never cheat on someone I'm with with a person of the same gender as they are or with someone of the opposite.

It just means that if I'm single, I'm as likely to get into a relationship with a woman as a man.

bi guys are just straights in waiting. Every bi guy ends up straight or living conventionally straight lives at the very least. I have zero time or patience for bi guys.

R40 and R31 are your typical biphobic gay men who don't understand bisexuality and make no effort to do so.

A lot of bisexual men partner with men, and the worst kept secret of the so called "gay" world is that lots of men who are bisexual identified as gay first or for a period in their life, or they're like R12 and call themselves "gay" just because they want a relationship with a man but they're bisexual since they're sexually attracted to both genders.

What's so difficult to understand OP? If you're bisexual you're sexually attracted to men and women, and it doesn't have to be 50/50 or pretty equal.

Bi female. My sexual attraction towards somebody is very specific and has to do with that person. I find lots of people attractive in a general way but I'm only sexually drawn to a very few. I'm naturally monogamous as a result. If I'm into somebody, I don't see anybody else. The female partners I've had have not been able to accept this idea at all and have been very jealous and suspicious.So now I avoid lesbian relationships. I don't think it will ever work out for me with a woman.

The people to whom I've been sexually drawn in my life have been very different physically but all tend to have the same sort of "energy"-mercurial, witty and slightly manic. I'm also drawn to people who bend gender in some way. I don't know why that is as I am very feminine, but it must have to do with this general love of trickster, shape shifter types.

I have many close male friends, straight and gay. I can't tell you how many of them have told me about bisexual feelings or experiences they've had. It's so much more common for men than anyone thinks. Most of the men I know are naturally romantic sorts and are led by emotion and I think this has caused them to "go for it". Two of the straight men had secret bisexual relationships that lasted for a year or more with men to whom they felt attached. Both of these guys are now with women and happy with them. The funny part is that the straight guys I know seem to have far fewer hangups about their bisexuality or their relationships with men, though naturally they are careful about who they tell. The gay ones are way more self loathing about it. Unfortunately, most of my gay male friends are way more self loathing about practically everything. I wish they would give themselves a break.

Oh, I had sex with a girl in college 23 years ago.

Yeah, it's cool being "bi."

R44 isn't bisexual at all and is trying to claim that other people can't be bisexual.

I happen to be gay but my brother is bisexual and yes people can be bisexual.

r41, I totally agree that the 'gay' world has been presented as being comprised of mostly homosexuals when this isn't the case. I can even understand why it was done: for political expediency. It's much easier to sell the idea of homosexuality to the public because it's presumably a fixed orientation. One look at the posts here, where people write about their bisexuality shifting and changing over time, highlights the issues posed with using bisexuality as the forefront argument for 'gay' rights. So yeah, I do think the 'gay' rights movement has been built on some lies and half-truths, a sort of 'ends justify the means' approach. The truth is that bisexuality is much more predominant in the 'gay' world than has been acknowledged.

The power is overwhelming, the desire for sex apparent in every man and woman is enough to elevate me to the most advanced of species on the animal kingdom. I am king.

What's so difficult to understand?

Bisexuals are sexually attracted to both genders, straight people are only sexually attracted to the opposite gender, and gay men and lesbians are only sexually attracted to the same gender.

I'm a guy that can be attracted to men and women, and each kind of attraction emphasizes something different sexually.

Like many women I've talked to, the emotional component is more important for me when it comes to my attraction to another guy. The right guy can make you feel like you can let your guard down, that you are special. I don't put a lot of stock in being macho, so rather than obsess about feeling weak like most men do, I find that feeling liberating, and often, it can be a real turn on.

With women, the focus is more on them and their sexuality-- which is also perfectly fine because women are beautiful and I love losing myself in that beauty when I'm with one. I also feel like being with a woman is more satisfying when I feel like taking a more active role rather than a more passive one.

Figuring all of this out was not easy, especially when there are so few men who are open and comfortable about these sorts of feelings in a society that hates what it doesn't understand. I spent a long time hating myself too for the same reason: not knowing why I felt the way I felt, trying to force myself to ignore one side or the other just so I could identify as either gay or heterosexual.

Ironically, once I did decide to settle down into a monogamous relationship (my wife of 6 years), our love life has benefited from my flexibility. By embracing a broader sense of my own sexuality, things have stayed very fresh and passionate.

Does that mean I'm not attracted to guys anymore? Of course not- just like I'm still attracted to other women sometimes. Kinda like most men, ya know? Just because there are supposedly more possibilities for me out there doesn't make me any less loyal: lock a married person in a room with 20 people instead of 10 people, they should still be able to get through the night without sleeping with one of them.

What so hard?

You put peeney in baby hole, dummy!

Bisexuality=vanity

Are you ronery?

Go bi, every night you have date!

[quote] At one point I liked the idea of a relationship with both a man and a woman at the same time but I'm not sure if a relationship with more than one person works?

I would love to be in a monogamous relationship with 2 other people.

I’m a bi man and I’d say I’m a Kinsey 3. I like very masculine men, and curvy feminine women. I’ve had relationships with both and I honestly can’t say what is better. I think when it comes to relationships men and women are not that different from each other. As for sex, my favorite get-up is an M/M/F three-way. I do him, while he eats her out. That’s my absolute favorite. However, it’s not easy to find another man willing to do that, unless he’s bi as well. I once did a three-way with a gay guy and a straight girl. It was pretty awkward, because he was quite into me doing him, but you could tell he tried to avoid her. Which is difficult when you’re together in one bed. She was annoyed that he didn’t do more with her.

When I’m in a committed relationship, I’m monogamous though. Yes, I look at women, I have a boyfriend right now, but I’d never act on it. He’s bi, but leaning more towards gay, but he’s not bothered about it. Overall, I think bi men are not that different from straight or gay men. Some are monogamous, some like to sleep around, some like kink, and some like vanilla.

Trust a bi at your own peril.

I dream of being part of a committed monogamous MMF marriage (or equivalent), eventually even having children together. I wonder if the dynamic of two bi guys and a woman who all love each over equally (is that even possible?) is different enough and mutually dependent enough to avoid the usual pitfalls of possessive jealousy and rivalry? I can't imagine ever being jealous being watching my virile brother husband fucking our wife's beautiful pussy. Sadly, I doubt any woman would go for it. Society not evolved enough. Still, I can dream.

Don't we already have a "gay conservative republican" thread going?

R40 is correct, mostly. Their more like 85% straight. I have NEVER met an openly bi-sexual male(open to me at least)in a same-sex relationship. Every time I have met one who acknowledged they are partnered it's a woman that their with. Every time. I vow to never date one. What's the point? It won't last. See R23.

What what's like? What we feel about what? Such broad questions.

[quote]Quite a few of the bisexual responses seem to be saying that they are emotional/sexually attracted to men or to women, but enjoy sex with the other.

This is me. I enjoyed sex with men in college, but I can really only emotionally connect on an intimate basis with women. My spouse of 26 years was in love with a man when she was in college, so she seems more bi than I am. We identify as lesbian but I guess we are both actually bi.

LOL R30 says he likes "Curvy Women", then references Scarlett Johansson. LAWL!

What does it feel like? For me, it just feels right. Its all Ive ever known. There are certain kinds of women I like and certain kinds of guys I like. But what I get from each it totally different. Even the emotional connection is different.

Some days, you wake up and want the Pole. But some days, you wake up and you want the Hole.

They eventually settle down with the opposite sex and perpetuate the belief that sexual orientation is a choice.

Bet r62 is closeted and tell's all his prospective girlfriends he's straight as an arrow. Bi men are pathetic.

What's it like, OP? It's like this.

Bisexuality =

Homosexual pleasure

plus

Heterosexual privilege.

That's what it's like.

OP, I'm bisexual, ask me anything you want.

r66 nails it.

You know what is really pathetic R65? Assholes who pass judgment on strangers.

The same as R62. I really cant say what it feels like because I dont have anything to compare it to. It's like asking, "what does it feel like to have blue eyes?"

Hit close to home, r69? Thought so.

{quote]R66 nails it

People have been "nailing it" with that tired old line for the past four decades or so.

Seems like the one who was hit close to home is you. BTW, nothing in R62's post says they are a man. That you jumped to that conclusion based on nothing but the voices in your head says a real lot about you.

Bisexuality exists and I don't understand how or why many people find it so difficult to wrap their heads around the fact that some individuals are sexually and/or emotionally attracted to both genders. It's not quantum physics. We all can understand it.

However, societal pressures do play a role in how people publicly identify and how they behave. Just as bisexual people face discrimination (usually homophobia, because people assume that their same sex attraction makes them fundamentally gay), they are also riddled with prejudice. Openly bisexual people are often very homophobic, and the "homophobes are secretly gay" adage is only partially true: I'm sure that many latently/closet bisexuals are among the files of those who hate gays because they hate that part of themselves.

Everywhere in which this debate emerges, the enormous differences between bisexuals and gay people emerge - same sex attraction is the one and only thing we have in common, and even that is only a peripheral link. We are not the same at all and we shouldn't mix.

R41 is right, though. The gay world has quite a few (but not the majority he pretends) men who are bisexual, and deliberately lie to their partners and everybody in order to have it "easy". In the same way that bisexuals in heterosexual relationships lie. Only, in this last case they are more frequent for the very simple reason that bisexuals in opposite sex relationships ARE a majority.

Personally, I think that bisexual people should have their own spaces and stop leeching from the gay community whenever it suits them, while throwing us under the bus whenever they want to fulfill their ultimate aspiration of being "straight".

W&W for R66

Sorry, R75, what's this "W&W" thing?

I've seen it several times and I never manage to find out what it is.

That is a decades-old quote, R75. And it pops up (like clockwork) on every single thread DL thread about bisexuality. Do you like to nominate "What's on his victrola" posts for W&W as well?

R6 Exactly.

R3 You bitch!

[quote], while throwing us under the bus whenever they want to fulfill their ultimate aspiration of being "straight".

That's very true. Just look at bis like Robert Downey Jr or Jessie J, once they've had their fill of homosex, they disavow it and proclaim their straightness. If you are gay, to bis you are just a plaything until they are ready to settle down into a hetero life. Fuck em, but never love em, that is how you should approach bis.

R74 Interesting

There is so much ignorance out there

I'm a bisexual man. I've never heard it expressed this way, but in my mind the gay side and straight side take turns being dominant. The kidding myself part would be if I pretend that they don't both exist. Bisexual porn does nothing for me. Two men and one woman looks very fake.

I watch gay porn for the men, but sometimes I get tired of it and switch over to straight porn. Every now and then there will be a woman who steals the show. Back in the day it was Ashlyn Gere. Nowadays it's usually a bossy MILF or a corrupt schoolgirl.

The following women can have me any time they want me: Salma Hayek Catherine Zeta Jones Fran Drescher Sofia Vergara Zoe Deschanel Julia Louis-Dreyfus Margaret Brennan from CBS news Robin Meade from HLN

I like to look at large tits on women and nice asses on everyone. I don't think I've ever paid attention to a man's bulge even while watching diving. I like the feel of a warm naked woman's breasts pressed up against me in bed, and her wetness increasing during intercourse because she's so turned on.

My last girlfriend would tell me stop looking at her with so much lust in public, which was true. I would have flashes of gay porn sometimes during sex with her, but I would also think about sex with her as I was watching gay porn. Sometimes she was horny and had 100% of my attention from beginning to end.

I consider myself bi, but I believe I have psychological problems. I am only attracted to masculine guys, I think I didnt have enough of a father figure and in always searching for bro type relationship. I have only had one relationship with a girl in college and she was coming to terms with being bi her self. I can be sexual with anyone I'm open with and don't have secrets. I could fuck the shit of a girl if she knew I was bi and cool with it. If I was trying to play it straight I would have no real connection and would not be able to sleep in the same bed. I think I will propably end up with a women who is cool with all my sides. I do notice something about guys like myself. The type that go back and forth may be on denial of being fully gay. Being bi or str8 is easier to accept. But guys that go back and forth- and this is just my experience and others I observed. Have low self esteem mixed with narcissism. We are the type that care too much what people think but come across as we don't. We project ourselves on to the women and use her like a prop. Just to prove something to ourselves. It's hard to explain. Kanye west is a perfect example of this. He is definitely bi and in limbo. He's with a woman for reasons other than attraction more of an ego thing,

There are always exceptions to the rule but bisexuals will generally trade you in for the acceptance of their family and friends when the time demands. They are not emotionally honest or coherent. Self serving and ruthlessly self centred they will always pursue the easy way and throw you under the next bus as and when it is expedient. It doesn't of course mean they'll not seek a little afternoon delight on the sly at some later date but the lure of the heterosexual norm prevails for them.

Before the outrage flows there are exceptions of course, but very very few.

Being bi is like a buffet. A wide range of choices, though not every dish is to my taste. Attraction to some physical or spiritual aspect of the human being. I don't notice gender, but rather the flash or spark of that something in a person that compels me to look and want to connect.

was a 0 kinsey. got to some tranny porn and stopped watching pussy on how fake the porn is when women are featured. Now I am watching a lot of gay porn and busting crazy nutz. The strong back the tight ass, big dick, legs and grunts and moans of a man gets me soo horny. I would love to know and test a guy and be with a guy because women are just crazy and I can't relate to them at all. All the PMS, have to be psychic on what they want, and they are all psychos. I am attracted to them but I can't be in a relationship with one any longer

Porn fucked me up but it did change my sexuality and did it for the better. I think it is society that locks the bisexuality in men and many men who are hetero have it unlocked in them

I have not tried a man but i think i will love it. I just know it. Guess it makes me bi curious.

I could be with a gay from feminine to kind of masculine. I am masculine for sure.

It was weird reading horny me of years ago. My life was so much simpler back then.

I think some people here misjudge bisexuals' hetro relationships when they are older and ready to have kids. The thought that doing that would be more socially acceptable had never crossed my mind in the past year while I have been thinking more and more about having kids and starting a family. I can see myself committing to this regardless of my partner's gender, but I'd be lying if I didn't admit that I have been dating more women recently.

I don't think my sexual orientation has changed, since I still lust after certain men and women, but I find that what I'm actively seeking is different and it attracts different people.

I know some here thinks I'm proof that bi is bad, but every person is different and I'm only talking about myself here. Maybe I will meet a great guy who is committed to starting a family. Maybe I will end up with a woman. I don't know but I think it's unfair to judge bisexuals' relationships differently as if they are betraying their gay side no matter what they do.

Bisexuality means being ready to date/fuck anybody regardless of gender to achieve what you want.

Never met a bi male or female who wasn't a selfish egomaniac, taking what they needed in a person and then moving unto the next.

Bisexuals get horny at the sight of power / charisma and what people can bring them.

Give me a call when you notice a bisexual somewhere in a relationship based on selfless love. Just love.

I live in a city of 5 million people where any kind of sexual kink and predilection is so commonplace that nobody really cares. In all those years here, mingling with and getting to know all kinds of people, do you know how many bisexuals I have met? ONE. He was dating men exclusively, then tried to live with a female friend of mine for a couple of years, and then started cheating on her with a man and he's been gay ever since she saw the light and darted out of that "relationship." Last time I saw him he was cruising guys at my gym.

R88 is on the money here: show me one "bisexual" who is in a stable, long-term relationship based on love.

Your breath smells like both cock and pussy.

Here is what it feels like for me to be a bisexual male:

I get sexually aroused looking at young, fresh, shaved vaginas that look just ripe for penetrating!

My porn of choice typically isn't guy on guy action. Guy on guy action is only hot for me when it's two guys hooking up you wouldn't expect to see hook up with other men(such as seeing Eric and Jason hook up in "True Blood" or Josh Hartnett hooking up with Reeve Carney in "Penny Dreadful"). Also, a guy whose sexual orientation is a mystery, such as with Harry Styles, is a lot more hot than a guy who is out and openly gay.

My porn of choice also isn't lesbian porn.

I generally enjoy watching guy on girl porn. I love watching handsome, strong, fit men fucking girls in missionary position. I also enjoy guy on guy action more when they're sharing a girl, but I'm generally not interested in watching one guy butt fuck another guy when they should be fucking the girl instead.

When it comes to erotic fiction, I generally enjoy reading fiction from the point of view of a girl, usually a female virgin, getting fucked for the first time.

But I LOVE the male body. I love young, lean boys, or fit, handsome men. While I love young, nubile female bodies with fresh vaginas, otherwise, I'm not too excited by the female body other than that.

When I'm out in public, I generally feel more desire when I see young, handsome males, and I feel the need to take care of them. I want to hold them the way I want to pick up and hold a cat when I see a cat. Maybe I just relate to mens' struggles more? I feel sad, too, because they are generally straight and I can't have them.

When I see attractive females, I feel out of their league and I feel unattractive (even though I'm a relatively attractive 6'5" male who weighs 215 lbs, who benches 205 lbs and squats 260 lbs). I also feel resentful because I feel like I should be getting more attention from them.

Being bi is like being a true vers, you're able to switch roles depending on the situation. I'm not bi as I'm much more attracted to males, but I can imagine that the way I am as a vers is the way a bi person feels, you go through stages of purely bottoming or topping, or are 50/50. It all depends. Bi men tend to be married to women. It's not their fault but society's. I love hooking up with bi men.

R47 is the only authentic bisexual on this thread.

r91, you're a creeposexual.

I am {86} and since i would prefer a ying to my yang, meaning I as masculine and the other more feminine, I would believe that close to half of all gay men are more feminine than me and weirdly enough only want someone who is gay because of my assumptions that a lot of them are more feminine. Sorry if that offends some of you gay men but the stereotype that that I have NEVER viewed or heard of;however, there are plenty of those in gay men.

I honestly like that cute gay voice and everything else and find it sexy. I am not turned off in the slightest to even the most feminine because they are my opposite but a loud one is a turn-off

I date one and be with one and would get the hell away from my super religious parents in where I live with.

I like women but they are just so different some me mentally and physically and get intimidated on what i would do with a woman's part. I just have no idea.

While most of you gay men are hating on your feminine side and calling yourselves queen, sarcastic humor; i don't mind and like all you cunty bitches.It is to cute, lmao

You guys might hate me for stating my opinions but you guys wanted an answer from me and i give it to you guys

Best of both worlds

I love sucking cock but can only emotionally connect with a woman!

Bisexual men treat gay men like worthless shit and women like priceless gold and that is an absolute fact, if bi men where being really honest they'd admit to it, but they know it would show them in bad light, but it is totally true. Bi men treat gay men and gay sex /relationships like worthless shit and women and straight sex / relationships like priceless gold.

I think it's difficult to explain to someone who doesn't understand the idea of loving more than just one specific gender. Until I was 15, I was perfectly sure that I liked only men. But at that age, I met a girl. She fascinated me right away and I started feeling something for her, but I didn't realise that. But as time passed by, my feelings started to get stronger and I accepted the idea of loving her. First, it was kind of strange for me. I never thougt about the possibility of falling in love with a girl and suddenly, it happened. I told her how I felt and surprisingly, she felt exactly the same. I was so happy and I am still together with her, after three years and I still love her as much as possible. I think being bisexual means, that you love someone, because of their personality and not because they're a specific gender. I'm sure everyone heterosexual had that feeling before: You meet a person the same gender as you and you think - "Wow, if that person would be a girl/boy, I would probably go out with her/him." As a bisexual, you don't have that problem. If you fall in love with someone, than you do and it's perfectly fine.

Being Bisexual to is strictly sexual. There is no attraction to men other than sex. To me its just exploring.I always remain attracted to women for normal relationships. Its just having fun with both.

There is no understanding an individual's preferences. I have been seeing a guy off and on for a while who never says anything about labels (I assumed he was just in denial) but then casually mentions that he can't get enough of the pussy of some ftm. I was like WTF? I honestly think some people will do anything sexual if it's presented to them.

You blend into the mainstream

Each bisexual is unique, bro

[quote]Being Bisexual to ME is strictly sexual.

I assume that's what you really meant, r100?

R100 is just a troll.

There is an epidemic of sexual violence against bisexual women, and it’s invisible. ADVERTISING

Even most LGBT activists and sexual assault activists are unaware of the statistics that while straight women have a 17 percent chance of being raped and lesbians have a 13 percent chance, bisexual women have a 46 percent chance of being raped. In other words, bisexual women are approximately three times more likely to be raped. Bisexual women also have higher rates of sexual assault, intimate partner abuse, and stalking, compared to both straight and lesbian women. In addition to this, bisexual women survivors have the lowest rates of social support when disclosing trauma, the highest rates of depression and post-traumatic stress disorder after rape, and the most negative experiences when seeking help from formal support resources such as rape crisis centers, therapists, police, and medical professionals.

There are many complex reasons for this huge disparity in rates of violence, but the simplest reason is that bisexual women are hypersexualized, fetishized, and sexually objectified in our culture and media. Bisexual women are stereotyped as slutty, pretending to be bi for sexual attention, and always interested in sex (particularly threesomes). Basically, we are not viewed as people but as sexual objects, always eager to fulfill men’s pornographic fantasies. Our consent doesn’t matter, because our bisexual identity is perceived as automatic consent to anyone and everyone who might be interested in us.

Additionally, bisexual women can be victims of “corrective” rape, a hate crime in which someone is raped because of their sexual orientation or gender identity, usually in an attempt to “fix” them. Bi women are also more likely to end up in abusive relationships, in part because abusers are good at targeting vulnerable people who have poor social support, and also because abusers can use biphobia to threaten their partner, lower their self-esteem, or pressure them into sex against their will.

Biphobia also presents a huge barrier to receiving help in the aftermath of an assault — the stereotype that bi women are slutty liars, for example, may lead to friends and family to doubt a bi woman survivor when she comes forward. Biphobia also leads to social isolation and causes many support resources, such as sexual assault centers and counseling, to be unsafe for bi women. Bi women survivors who are marginalized in other ways face even further barriers to help — trans bi women, bi women of color, and disabled bi women survivors are some of the most vulnerable in our community.

If you find these numbers shocking, you are not alone. I was shocked too, when I learned these statistics a couple of years ago. I was even more surprised to learn that despite all of this, there are absolutely no rape recovery resources for bisexual women — no organizations, crisis centers, support groups, books, nothing. So last October, I started the Bi Women Support Network on tumblr. In less than a year, we have grown to nearly 2,500 followers, and we have mailed out care packages and Christmas cards, organized a Facebook support group and a pen pal program, published posts on biphobia and rape recovery, and answered countless questions from bi women survivors.

I am very proud of my work, but more needs to be done for this community. When three out of four bisexual women are sexual assault survivors, we need more than a Tumblr funded by donations and managed by college students in their spare time. I have heard from far too many survivors that our blog is the best — and sometimes only — recovery resource they have. I am honored that we have been able to help these women, but I am heartbroken that their friends, family, and community have turned their backs on them.

It is time for the national dialogue on LGBT rights and equality to address the issue of sexual violence in our community. It is also time for the dialogue on sexual assault to address

Great thread, everyone. OP, you set a good tone for a dialogue and that's what you got; people exchanging different perspectives and learning from each other, respectfully.

I'm like an earlier poster who is a Kinsey 5. I'm in a committed relationship with a man and I have no desire to be with women, although I did when I was younger and it was more about individual women I desired and loved. I'm monogamous and people often don't understand how that works with bisexuality. Basically, I met my special someone and now I'm off the market. I'm a happily gay man although there was a time when I dated men and women. A bit hard to explain, but there it is. Some people think that bisexuality = promiscuity. Anyway, I'm here to tell you, it doesn't.

What is it like to be a unicorn, I wonder? What do they feel at that fleeting moment when they stop being just a figment of our collective imagination and we swear we can almost feel their presence around us?

it is not a big deal yall

It's just me

Bi woman here. I am emotionally attracted to men and women equally, but the sexual activity that I need and most enjoy is screwing, and that requires a man. Definitely not interested in penetrative sex involving any kind of device. I tend to like masculine men with feminine faces and hair, and feminine women. I don't place much distinction between men and women; I am always the same person around men or women. I have a lot of gay male friends and find those friendships the most drama-free.

I as thinking of starting with a Poll, but I suspect that many of the bisexuals wouldn't be able to decide.

Bisexuality does double your chances for a date on Saturday night.

It's hot

Wonderful

Either that or the only women who would identify themselves as bisexual in a poll were the ones who fit the standard R106. I'm not buying your statistics. The sample size of bisexual women was too small.

Fascinating (mostly) grownup discussion on this topic for once. I really appreciated the personal insights; though I could’ve done without the sociology lectures. Wish it had limited its scope to male bisexuality (although many of the women made very interesting points) as there’s no shortage discussion of that out there already and moreover in light of woman’s sexuality (possibly uniquely?) having a high degree of plasticity and contingent on socitial pressures etc .makes male and females bisexuality (or just male and female sexuality in general) entirely incomparably different species

For me bisexuality is about appreciation, but then sex and love (in general) is about expressing one's appreciation for someone (or something) else.

Often the discussion about sexuality becomes very negative and defensive, because most people were (and still are) raised to create hang-ups (shame, disgust, etc.) around the topic they carry over to adulthood and / or 'til they die.

It becomes all about "this or that is soooo disgusting! I could NEVER do that and I judge everybody who does that and think it's pleasurable, because JUDGING YOU!". Sex, like any other topic these days, is about passing judgement and the attempt to set yourself above everybody else (the high almighty attitude).

Initially I’m attracted more to bodies than faces. Personality (eg. masculinity, swagger in a man) is important too and can be a dealbreaker moreso even than a face; femininity is super important in a woman.

In my sexual brain I have a template for male bodies and a template female bodies which triggers sexual cues. The male templat fits a greater number of males because male bodies tend to be more standardised just sized up or down, horizontally, younger or older. With men I have a greater toleration for deviation from my ideal because the skeleton and male shape basically remains the same. Even an olld guy can conceivably get his body buff again; unlike women his sexual appeal to me is not predicated on fertility-signalling fat deposits that necessarily continue to sag and/or consumed by ageing.

Anything that falls outside the frame of either template registers as occupying an uncomfortably in between or androgynous state and therefore non-sexual or even triggering a disgust response.

My template for women is entirely tuned to a specific “fertile” body shape, a particular hip-to-waist ratio that I’d call a slim/moderate pear shape: big ass/hips small waist but, crucially, also narrow shoulders (NOT hourglass) with a delicate upper body and small rib cage. Large tits are a BIG turn on too but I can forgo in lieu of the former but not vice versa. This is not a fussy preference thing; my female attraction is not experienced as a dimmer switch but rather as an on/off switch. Most women do not look like this. Even most hollywood actresses or top models famed for their beauty do not look like this. I find many women don’t register as suffiently “female enough” in my brain . Ive discovered that by manipulating the hip-waist-shoulder ratio in Photoshop I can get instantly turned on without fail. So it appears to be hardwired That’s my Goldilocks-zone dilemma.

I find I’m more attracted to the acreage guy than I am to the average woman. (So I don’t know what that says about my Kinsey score). BUT the women I do find attractive it’s the EXACTLY the same intensity as it is for the hottest guy, maybe even more intense because of her rarity value. Also my fap folder is 70% of the women I’m attracted to and the rest is male with female, some male solo; but for some reasonno gay porn as it’s never turned me on. But to headoff any accusations of self-hatred, I am *very* turned on by masculine looking guy’s mouth kissing. So yeah it’s confusing.

I think the longwinded takeaway is that bisexuals are far more psychosexually disparate and far less cohesive as a group than homosexuals

^ I’m a male

Coke or Pepsi, Tea or Coffee, MSNBC or FOX News, Men or Woman, I only like the first, never the second.

but I believe different strokes for different folks. Interesting thread OP.

This is for you OP.

OP, it is wonderful. But no sexuality is better than any other one.

Complex

Bisexual feels nothing as they are only empty, unfeeling vessels.

Bisexuality is a joke.

R125 and R126 with that bigoted troll logic if you dislike bisexual men, you must really dislike gay men. Quit projecting your own bigotry and issues with being gay onto bisexual people.

It is wonderful.