The makeover/shopping for clothes montage %0D\
The scene where the supportive gay friend gives advice to a lovelorn single woman%0D\
taking the common whore to the opera where she cries
Women dancing around a table and lip sync''ing a song into various kitchen utensils.
The car chase that always involves hitting a fruit or vegetable stand.
Never a bride, always a bridesmaid.
Makeover scenes and the dancing with utensils need to go the way of the dinosaur. When did that start anyway? I don''t remember Bette Davis or Liz Taylor doing shit like that. As a female I can assure you I have never lip synched with a ladle to my lips.
photo of someone pointing a gun on a DVD
That''s a good one R3. Also in car chases:%0D\
1. some guys crossing the street with a huge pane of glass%0D\
2. a piano being hoisted to a 5th floor apartment%0D\
3. an old woman with a bag lady cart and/or a young woman with a baby carriage crossing the street.
Speaking of cliches I am right now watching Avatar and the hero is delivering his rousing speech right before they go on the attack.
r5 I misread you as saying that you had never lip synched with your lady lips. %0D\
That should actually become a cliche.
1. the monologue before killing someone that gives the other person just enough time to figure out how to escape.
2. The part where the two love stricken heroes decide to stop in the middle of running for their lives to profess their undying love for each other.
3. The part where the husband/wife comes home to a suspicious looking room and a wife/husband that is awkwardly trying to keep them from going into "that" room. Of course the suspicious spouse peels the doors open to discover an affair.
4. See above, with the slight alteration that the cheating spouse's lover has had just enough time to get dressed and create a clever enough excuse for said awkward situation. "Oh, Bill was just asking me for decorating advice Mary, he wanted to surprise you."
5. The inevitable chick fight complete with hair pulling.
6. The part where the main character breaks into monologue only to explain the blatantly obvious to the audience. Prince of Persia is a classic example. They spent a full ten minutes explaining that the dagger controls time.
Michael Cera playing Michael Cera%0D\
Arabs/Muslims as terrorists.
The "happy couple" montage. Couple kissing, cut to couple cooking, cut to couple laughing, cut to couple dancing, cut to couple walking on the beach holding hands.\
Family breakfast montage as Mom, Dad and the kids are rushing to get out the door -- these are always aimed at soccer moms to make the female character seem relatable.
Nice black man dies every time. Sacrifices himself for whitey. Yeah, right.
But they are real R14.
-Someone wakes up from a nightmare, bolts upright, almost hitting the camera, has sweat dripping down his face.\
-In a haunted house movie: Parent notices that their belongings have been moved and blames child "Honey, do you mind not playing with my books".
the person is about to be shot by the villan, then suddenly...a third person is there with a gun to save the day
so-called normal middle class family, living in a gigantic mansion
Makeover montages where the ''ugly'' girl only needs to take off her nerdy glasses and wear to some slutty outfit to appear hot and desirable.
The same goes for guys R21. The skinny geek gets a new haircut and clothes and suddenly he''s the hot guy.
any kind of explosion or special effect.
All those stupid romcoms where the girl in question works at a magazines/PR firm/fashion/publishing house that would barely pay minimum wage and yet affords her a lavish apartment in the city and loads of designer clothes, meets cute with some hot and but unavailable guy and blah blah blah, they somehow overcome all obstacles to live happily ever after in the end.\
These usually star Kate Hudson, Reese Witherspoon, or Katherine Heigl.
Suspense sequence. Sweaty, trembling, hyperventilating character fearfully enters a a creepy old house, attic or basement not knowing what evil lurks..... without turning on the fucking lights.
Girl getting out of bed after sex and pulling off the top sheet to wear on the way to the bathroom.
[quote]any kind of explosion[/quote]\
In particular, people running away from huge assed explosions just in the nick of time\
(3D addendum: while burning hunks of debris fly into the audience)
Business owners who have cute, trendy businesses that would never thrive in the real world---especially since said owners appear to only work there part-time and all the scenes in the shop show very few customers. Candy shops, bakeries, used book stores, antique shops, vintage clothing boutiques, coffee shops. It''s pure fantasy.
Annoyed "real" business owner
Saying "hello, hello, HELLO" and hundred times and pressing the receiver button on an old landline phone as though the person who hung up might magically reconnect.
The sex scene which features a close up of hands clenching together - who does this in bed, really?
The morning-after scene in which the chick''s makeup is perfect and no one''s hair looks like it was drawn on with an Etch-A-Sketch
Wake up kissing/making out. Yuck. Go brush your teeth.
Auditioning nannies/roommates/potential partners in rapid succession, where one of the interviewees is always a satanist/weirdo/dominatrix/person of the opposite sex they are pretending to be, etc.\
"Coming to America" may have started this type of scene, though I''m not sure.
The supposedly normally dressed woman who''s wearing stockings with a garter belt instead of panty hose. Especially with a miniskirt.
Baby Boom had one of those scenes R33.
Using a heart-beat sound effect to tell the audience that this should be a suspenseful scene, or a growling large animal sound effect to tell the audience they should be frightened.
Big corporations ARE evil, R14, and everyone knows it. Stop trying to slip in your filthy propoganda.
The whole movie Slumdog Millionaire.. boy falls in love with girl, boy loses girl, boy finds girl, boy and girl fall madly in love.. yeah, because we''ve never seen that before, right?
I still can''t believe it won all those Oscars
[quote]All those stupid romcoms where the girl in question works at a magazines/PR firm/fashion/publishing house that would barely pay minimum wage and yet affords her a lavish apartment in the city and loads of designer clothes, meets cute with some hot and but unavailable guy and blah blah blah, they somehow overcome all obstacles to live happily ever after in the end.%0D\
And in the opening credits, she''s typically running late for work as she shown rushing from her apartment to the office, swearing under her breath and doing mildly clutzy things to establish how adorable and average she is, in spite of the lavish backdrop. She must also rush by a coworker and apologize for some sort of work product which is late.
"Girl getting out of bed after sex and pulling off the top sheet to wear on the way to the bathroom"%0D\
Seriously - Has anyone ever done this in real life? "I''ll just pull the entire sheet over my body when I get out of bed!"
It always bothered me in Sex and the City when SJP would be shown having sex with her bra on. So stupid, and you know it was just because she had a no nudity clause in her contract.\
What sex columnist in real life would fuck with her bra on all the time?
I was just thinking about the bra thing, R41. Add to that - who the hell goes to sleep with their bra on?
Every female teen romcom character is a klutz without fail. They are always seen falling down, spilling their lunch tray, walking into walls, etc., and embarrassing themselves in front of the cute, jock love interest.
Thank you R43. I caught a snippet of the Princess Diaries one night and cringed when Ann Hathaway''s character had to dine with her grandmother and some other VIPs and was spilling food, breaking wineglasses and causing general mayhem. Did her mother raise her in a sty and throw slops to her? Another one was You Again. Kristen Bell''s character was generally graceless and always making an idiot out of herself.
I never realized before I watched movies that every single woman scientist was attractive and in her 20''s.
One of my grudges against Hollywood movies R45.
The wisecracking negro who just cannot take anything seriously to save his life.\
Offensive and lame stereotype!
I''m looking at you, Marlon Wayans!
Female doctors are all unrealistically attractive too. Ridiculous that Cameron Diaz'' ditzy character in Something About Mary was a doctor.
So funny that SJP has a nudity clause. As if ANYONE is interested in seeing her naked.
I''m sick of seeing the same demographic dominating in just about all movies and TV. Where are the young people and old people? And people without orange skin?
That casting was an absolute joke R48. No doctor would ever act that fucking stupid and vapid.
Patricia Arquette on Medium gasps as she is waking from a nightmare/vision. \
The nerd gets the hottie in the end.
About the clumsy girl thing, I am that clumsy and while my friends think it is endearing, there is no way someone as clumsy as me could survive a high profile job.\
I once had the opportunity to sit in on a dinner meeting with a political planning committee and ordered shrimp with rice. They put the shrimp on skewers and when I tried to remove one it went flying across the table and knocked over a water glass. The politicals in the room spent the rest of the night making jokes about my clumsiness and daring me to order more shrimp. The thing in the movies that makes it unreal is that no one ever takes a cute clumsy person seriously, they''re like the puppy you want to pet on the head.
"You mean this picnic is ruining our ants!"
Renee Zellwegger (sp?) on Family Guy
Has anyone mentioned the 30s-40s-50s-60s convention in which hero and villain fight, while hero''s girlfriend either stands, looking on, useless and helpless, or else in intervening, bops the hero on the head?\
That one played out hundreds of times. \
And I bet it still does.
Let''s not forget where our hero has a training montage for the fight of his life set to Eye of the Tiger or something. Every movie like that since Rocky.
Two men struggle over a gun; the gun goes off and they both bulge their eyes out while the audience isn''t quite sure which guy has been shot.\
Then, you see blood on one guy''s white (of course because it shows blood better) shirt and you think he''s been shot, but no, it''s the other guy''s blood and then he slumps the floor.
A subset of explosions: hero walks away from/without looking back
[quote]I never realized before I watched movies that every single woman scientist was attractive and in her 20''s.\
With long, flowing, untied hair.
The movie that really brought home to me the ridiculousness of the gorgeous female scientist was National Treasure. A 20-something German blonde as a historian in charge of the National Archives. Um, yeah.......%0D\
I''ve basically given up on those types of movies and watch more indie films than ever now.%0D\
can''t stand that actress either.
How many leading men in modern comedies, get hit in the groin? All of them!
Couple has screaming row in kitchen. Kids are woken by the noise, get up to investigate, then sit half-way up the stairs as the row deepens.\
The scene either ends there, or: at least one child silently weeps, to be discovered by the Mom, who has stormed out of the kitchen. Having gathered up the weeper she emotes regret, then contempt for the person in the kitchen, then weariness at the human condition.
When someone knocks on a door and the one inside says, "Come on in. It''s open." Especially if they''re in the city, who the fuck leaves the door open so someone can walk in?%0D\
I love all of these. So fucking true.%0D\
[quote]Wake up kissing/making out. Yuck. Go brush your teeth.\
Not everyone is obsessed with having minty fresh breath.
Natural and man-made disasters that select their victims with a moral agenda. The bad guy''s final line in such scenes is usually, "AAAAAAHHHH!!"
The underground parking lot.\
A car drives past almost hits someone, screeching tires.\
Having to use the stairs to get to the garage.\
Getting into the parked car in the underground garage, etc.
The couple in bed. The girl is naked. She wraps herself in a sheet to get up. I have never never never wrapped myself in a sheet or known anyone who did!
Take some time to read the thread R68.%0D\
R65, you only ''think'' your morning breath isn''t offensive. It''s gross.
Everybody in New York City lives in Manhattan in a spacious, well-decorated apartment with great views, regardless of socio-economic status.
Nobody has to pee or take a dump when they wake up in the morning.
The bad guy who always explains his devious plan of destruction in minute detail before he''s killed by the hero/good guy.
No one ever locks their door when they leave. They simply open door, walk out and the door is standing wide open.%0D\
Hello, hello into the phone. If someone isn''t on immediately hang that bitch up.
R27, good call. I''ve done some of those explosions that heroes supposedly run away from and I cringe when I see them. Yeah, like you could run fast enough. Deck cord''s velocity of detonation is 25,000 feet/second! Of course the real stars are faster than that. They always have the time to duck into the room off to the side of the tunnel just in time. Another cliche I hate is the "cut the red wire/blue wire?" gag. It''s a standard set joke.
WHY oh WHY do they always show men dragging their female counterparts along by the hand when being chased? No one can run like that!
the motown dance sequence that announces possible resolution of huge plot point near the end of act two.
In action movies:
No one ever locks their car doors (except when being chased, so they can fumble for their keys and barely make it into the car on time).
Someone is always hiding, unnoticed, in the back seat of the car to spring up at just the right time.
In war movies:
The nerdy guy shows off a picture of his pretty girlfriend from back home (she always has two first names, like Bobbie Sue, Betty Jean, Susie Jo), just before a big battle scene. You know the nerdy guy is not coming back from the battle.
Chinese woman has her breasts shattered by an interdimensional timewarp. Her Nepalese bestie watches in awe as the shards become sentient, and host a magical game show.
[quote]In war movies: The nerdy guy shows off a picture of his pretty girlfriend from back home (she always has two first names, like Bobbie Sue, Betty Jean, Susie Jo), just before a big battle scene. You know the nerdy guy is not coming back from the battle.
I love old war movies. There are certain actors, like Aldo Ray, who as soon as you see him in a war movie, you know he'll die.
WWII propaganda movies are fun because they're a cliché a minute. You know what's going to happen to each of the characters as soon as they appear.
One punch or karate chop knocks someone senseless.
All the kickass women are tiny little anorexics whose entire body weight is equal to one leg of the men they beat the shit out of. (I blame Buffy). It's almost never a big strong looking woman like Brynn from Game of Thrones who looks like she could beat the crap out of anyone.
[quote]Arabs/Muslims as terrorists.
Darling, that's not a movie cliche: It's a reality cliche.
Signaling romance by having one of the characters supposedly light over 100 votive candles and place them on every empty surface in view.
^ one of the great Deb form Dexter lines: Jesus, Dex, are you trying to fuck her or set her on fire?
[quote]What sex columnist in real life would fuck with her bra on all the time?
Who would cast SJP as a sex columnist? The whole show required a certain suspension of belief.
There are a lot of cliched scenes in horror movies... I can't think of one but I'm sure there's plenty... Anyone?
In movies set in Paris, the protagonist's hotel room or apartment has a view of the Eiffel Tower
[quote]There are a lot of cliched scenes in horror movies... I can't think of one but I'm sure there's plenty... Anyone?
Where does one start? A couple have been posted in this thread.
The female (and it's ALWAYS a female. I don't recall ever seeing a male character do this) slips, trips, or falls while running away from the monster/killer/whatever and lies there looking behind her for a few seconds as the monster/killer/whatever approaches, before finally getting up and attempting to run away again.
The soon-to-be-killed idiot hears something in the dark house/cave/barn/whatever and walks TOWARDS the noise while calling out, "Hello? Is anybody there?" with no light or weapon.
The freaked out victim is frantically grabs a phone. The landline or mobile doesn't work. The idiot takes the device away from her/his ear, gives it an incredulous disgusted look, holds the looks for a couple of seconds, then throws the device down or across the room. Now the thing REALLY won't work.
Posted earlier: In the midst of running for their lives, and with the monster/killer/whatever only seconds behind them, the male and female (never a same gender couple) stop and kiss passionately and tell one another how much they're in love. (This always drives me absolutely mental.)
All kinds of weird, crazy, scary crap is happening at the house/school/campsite/wherever, and the idiots don't decide to leave/move/do something about it until it's far too late.
r87 If there is a couple going on a driving trip in a horror flick, they have always just had a miscarriage. I will think of more.
Chase scenes. Car has no ramp but launches itself over guard rails, other cars, and bridges.
Car uses handy passing auto truck with empty slots in its getaway, driving onto the truck, which the driver never notices. Then they drive off the truck without difficulty and speed away.
A third of all car chase scenes involve the dry concrete bed of the Los Angeles river, which is apparently not even fenced off.
The good guys accelerate in front of the handy passing freight train to separate themselves from the bad guys.
Only the bad guys in police chases are tracked by helicopter. Good guys only have to deal with police in their vehicles who make no effort to head them off. Miraculously, none of the police chasing the good guys is ever killed, so there will be no complications when the grizzled old veteran realizes that the good guys really are innocent and have been set up.
Bad guys always crash in a fireball so there is no possibility of escape.
Scenes where the car drives off a cliff...and then explodes!
When the good guys are proved innocent, none of the things they did such as resisting arrest, injuring officers, stealing cars, etc. ever leads to charges against them. The fact that they were innocent of murder somehow puts a forcefield halo around them causing the police not to charge them with the dozens of other crimes they committed. In real life this would never happen.
All the scenes with Rebecca Hall in The Town. Can't stand Ben Affleck since that movie. Not only is he one of the worst actors in Hollywood also his directorial skills/tastes are very trite. Don't know who's asses this guy is kissing to be considered a great director, but he sure does it a lot.
Every movie Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt, Leonardo Di Caprio and Johnny Depp are in are terribly cliché and stereotypical.
[quote] Every movie Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt, Leonardo Di Caprio and Johnny Depp are in are terribly cliché and stereotypical.
You clearly haven't seen many movies. Magnolia, What's Eating Gilbert Grape, Fight Club, Ed Wood?
Very sunny, perfect day.
Children playing in the garden.
Over the radio, Neville Chamberlain:
'Britain is now at war with Germany...'
The children continue playing, unaware of the powerful, historical moment.
Mother looks strong. She has to be. She has a family.
Father stares at the radio.
Cut to father dressed in army uniform. He's going off to war.
Newsreel footage of children being evacuated...
Cut to the suburban family house, white tape in triangles on the windows...
Not a scene per se, but the one line that is guaranteed to pull me out of a movie...
Black movie cliches
Scene where they talk about God making it better.
Ending with Soul Train Line or line dance
Scene where female character explains that all her bad behavior was because she was molested.
The overworked protagonist gets shat on by his family for missing the important family event he or she promised to be at because of some professional emergency.
I never want to see another fiendish master criminal (a) an improvised jail cell in the middle of a big room, (b) a cell with a floor-to-ceiling window.
The "bustling New York City" montage, always consisting of the following shots:
A traffic cop with whistle in mouth,
yuppies yapping away on cellphones as they cross the street,
people emerging from the subway terminal
someone hailing a taxi,
a mounted policeman,
a homeless person harmlessly picking through the trashcan,
a concentration of luxury cars and taxicabs in traffic,
a bike messenger.
...all in Times Square.
The sudden desperate declaration of love triumphantly signalling the end of a tortured star-crossed relationship...
...the passionate kiss...
...in the pissing, fucking rain.
[quote]Not a scene per se, but the one line that is guaranteed to pull me out of a movie...
Wow. I had no idea that line was so ubiquitous. Now, I'm certain to notice it and remember that montage.
The line "right here, right now."
A character standing up and giving a big speech that somehow motivates a roomful of people. Or worse, when said speech is greeted with silence... followed by one person slowly clapping and then the rest joining in, forming a thunderous ovation. *hurl*
High school kids who apparently have all the time in the world to investigate mysteries, solve crimes, get involved with the supernatural, etc.
A detective staring at a wall plastered with photos of victims.
The next morning, the empty bottle of whiskey and the phone call to wake him up.
Sex scenes with naked women while not showing much of man flesh.
While "Flight" showed gratuitous boobs, Washington showed nothing. Well, come to think of it, he was sporting a fairly well-sized pair of moobs.
The grand entrance of the "stranger in town": shot of a car's tires as it pulls up to the curb. The door opens, and out steps a pair of feet in very expensive shoes. After a few seconds, the camera pans up and we see the stranger's face in sunglasses, which he then removes after briefly surveying the surroundings.
Female variant: the shot of the shoes is replaced by a sexy leg in stilettos.
[quote]The whole show required a certain suspension of belief.
The phrase is "suspension of DISbelief"
When the guy cums all over the girl's face.
"Female variant: the shot of the shoes is replaced by a sexy leg in stilettos"
Yeah, there's always a token "sexy leg" shot to establish a female character who's supposed to be a "femme fatale" - you see this a lot in mysteries and thrillers
In any romantic adventure movie, the hero turns to the heroine who is being taken away (or the hero is being taken away):
"I will find you!"
I'm sure many a young straight porn addict has been shocked to find out that in real life relatively few women enjoy having a spunking knob aimed in their face.
R13, "The Naked Gun" does a wonderful turn on this.