If you don''t have anyone to pick you up after a medical procedure or surgery

can you sign a waiver or something so that the hospital will release you on your own?\ \ I want to have a procedure, but I don''t want anyone else to know about it. \ \ Thanks for the help and info.

• Hire a car service. They just don''t want you to drive.

• The moment they see that lifted face they will know. Tell them now.

• Why does the person picking you up have to know any details?

• Just wait until they turn their backs and leave. What are they going to do?

• Plan to take a taxi cab. It''s expensive but will buy you the independence you want.

• You can leave a hospital anytime you want. They just write AMA on your discharge instead of a doctor signing you out(Against Medical Advice). Be warned though it could affect insurance coverage of said procedure. Like you get an infection. Sorry you left AMA we aren''t going to pay.

• Get one of those driving services for seniors.

• I recently had a heart procedure (overnight stay) and they let me walk out on my own to hail a cab. Sometimes they say they require a pick-up, but they don''t necessarily mean it.

• When I had cataract surgery, they wouldn''t let me go home in a cab so I called a medical transport service -- same thing, actually a bit cheaper, and solves the problem nicely.

• R1 and R5, the hospital where I''ve had some medical procedures won''t approve a taxi ride home. I think it''s because the cab driver won''t take you inside and make sure you''re okay.

• They don''t watch you -- take a taxi.%0D\ %0D\ I had colonoscopy w/propofol, walked out no problem. I had D&C with general, a little dizzy, took cab. They said I MUST be picked up, then turned their backs. %0D\ %0D\ It''s all about liability.

• I had an ear surgery to repair my righ ear drum a few years ago. The surgery was at noon, I woke up at five, sat in a chair till nine because I was too dizzy to stand up, when a nurse told me I had to leave before nine pm since I was not required to stay overnight. I walked home (the hospital was four blocks from my apartment) with blood soaked gauze over my ear and blood dripping down my neck. Oh, and I stopped by the drugstore to pick up painkillers. \ That was kind of fun, when I think about it.

• I hired a car service in Washington DC a year ago to take me home after a colonoscopy, and after I had done the complete prep the night before to cleanse the intestines, and after I went to the clinic, put on a surgical garment, layed on a wheeled stretcher.....%0D %0D the anesthesiologist shows up and say he will NOT do the colonoscopy because I do not have a friend, acquaintance, or relative to take me home nor accompany me home.%0D %0D The bastard just could not believe that I didn't have a relative living in Washington DC or area.%0D %0D Provincial bastard anesthesiologist who thinks everyone lives near relatives. Idiotic mind set that all people MUST live near relatives.%0D Just because black people in DC often live near relatives, it doesn't mean everyone does.%0D %0D Many people are worldly and live all over the world in various places as an adult - and live no where near relatives.%0D %0D I really didn't have a friend or acquaintance who could take off a whole morning or whole afternoon to escort me after a colonoscopy.%0D %0D

• medical transport service....that is interesting....hadn''t thought of that for after a colonoscopy but....%0D\ %0D\ would a medical transport service escort me into my apartment and take me inside my apartment to make sure I am okay?%0D\ %0D\ That is what the Washington DC anestheologist required.

• These surgical centers were supposed to make our lives easier but, as usual, they benefit only the providers. Before, you didn''t get released from a hospital until you were well, now, they''ve thrown the aftercare on relatives or friends, those relatives and friends many of us do not have (or trust, or want around us when we are away from work or sick.)

• [quote]Provincial bastard anesthesiologist who thinks everyone lives near relatives. Idiotic mind set that all people MUST live near relatives. \ \ Lots of people live far away from their relatives, OP, but most of us have FRIENDS that we could call on in an emergency.\ \ If you don''t have anyone to help you, you need to get out more or even consider moving.

• [quote]I want to have a procedure, but I don''t want anyone else to know about it. %0D\ %0D\ Anal warts?

• Hire an escort from Craigslist.

• Flying American home to the Northwest after my triumphant dissertation defense in NYC this week, I have had the misfortune of being on a flight with the most mincing of prisspot flight attendants.\ \ She thinks she is all that with her shaved arms, jar head haircut, her tired little plastic ring around her left wrist for what the fuck ever that means... she cruised me when I came on board and immediately started glaring at me then turning away when I would look at her like "what the fuck are you looking at... MARY"\ \ I expect a decent experience when I fly transcontinental international first class and don''t plan to sit here and be stared at over her tired romance novel she is reading while she sits in the galley on that little jump seat... or to be patronized and have some bullshit insipit power struggle with the hired help.\ \ I''m going to report her ass to the customer complaint department and we will see who gets the last laugh. BBBBBB-OTCH.

  MissHelenBedd

• I think OP is lacking friends. Because, unless the procedue is a facelift, no one is going to know what it was -- LIE. %0D\ %0D\ If you have no close friends, hire a car and shut up.

• You can hire a nursing service. Kind of expensive. though.

• R16, I hate to break it to you, but there have been a good number of threads on Datalounge talking about being escorted home after surgical procedures especially after conoloscopies, and....%0D\ %0D\ many people on Datalounge did not have someone who could escort them home after the colonoscopy.%0D\ %0D\ So R16, go fuck yourself.%0D\ %0D\ Also, not everyone has a friend or acquaintance who can leave their place of work to escort an acquaintance or friend home without being docked salary or use up sick leave or use up vacation time.

• I''ve run into this situation and haven''t had the surgery as a result of the doctors office refusing to do it because I don''t have anybody to drop me off, wait during the surgery and then drive me home.\ \ I don''t have a huge amount of friends where I live. I don''t want to impose on one of the few people I do know to take time off from work so I can a minor procedure dine.

• OP, R19 is a good example of post procedure inanity and off topic rambling. Find a ride home or MHB is your future!

• Just exactly WHAT are you having done, OP?\ \ Is it shameful?!

• Prolapsed anus surgery again dear?

• The whole point is he doesn''t want to tell anyone about his gentile warts. Be nice and don''t ask.

  Mother

• I''m unclear on why the hospital refused to give you this information.

• I had 2 separate eye surgeries, cataract removal, and hired a county medical transport company for $2. $2.00 total, round trip. They did not escort me inside my home, just dropped me off in my driveway. call the county offices and see what they have in your area.

• When I had my sex reassignment surgery, I was in and out; able to drive myself home. Your Doctor is just too cautious. \ \ I had a Doctor try to convince me that Home Depot was not the place to by silicone, he was just getting a kick back from his distributor.

  A Real Girl Now

• #2.00!!! R29, that is amazing. It seems like the medical transport you used must have been especially for senior citiznes, hence so inexpensive?%0D\ %0D\ It seems like medical transport service would be at least #25 or $35 at a minimum for a non-senior citizen.

• [quote]Flying American home to the Northwest after my triumphant dissertation defense in NYC this week, I have had the misfortune of being on a flight with the most mincing of prisspot flight attendants%0D\ %0D\ To the new DL''ers...this never happened. %0D\ %0D\ MHB is trying to convince the freshman DL''ers that she is not a failed writer who lives in Hollywood.

• R32, I thought she was a bag lady who had found a lap top.

• I just am a private person, especially about my personal life. I don''t want people knowing certain things about me. Now I feel like I''m totally screwed. All I want is to have a procedure and keep it to myself. I don''t understand why the medical community feels the need to punish me for being private.

• Squirm a lot and grimace "Anal fissures."\ \ Nobody will inquire further.

• I have twice hired my former pet sitter to drive me to these appointments. (I would never ask a friend, neighbor, or colleague, and my family lives far away.) It worked out great. Because she is a dog walker, she runs around all day, so it was nothing for her to add me into the schedule. We told the people at the desk that she is a neighbor, and they don''t question it.

• I''ll drive you, OP. Ain''t got no job and I miss income. \ \ Will require first class air fare, 4 or 5-star hotel room for the night, and a $250 per diem, just like I had when I worked for a Fortune 50.\ \ Deal?

  And ... "my lips are sealed"

• The potato will most likely fall out on it''s own and all of this worry will have been for nothing.

• [quote]The whole point is he doesn''t want to tell anyone about his [bold]gentile[/bold] warts. Be nice and don''t ask.\ \ Are gentile warts different from Jewish ones?

• Yes, r39, gentile warts are found on the foreskin.

• It depends OP. When I had oral surgery and was only to be out for about 30 mins or so I planned to call a cab for the ride home.\ \ The surgeon wouldn''t let me, and said I either had to call someone I knew and make arrangements for them to pick me up or would have to do the procedure with local anesthetic or reschedule.

• I think some of you are being very mean to the OP re: comments about them not having any friends. %0D\ %0D\ I find when I''m in a long-term relationship friendships seem to suffer as the relationship takes up all the time. As a consequence it is quite possible when a relationship comes to an end to find all your friends (as a couple) take sides with your ex and you''re left like Billy Nomates.%0D\ %0D\ Over here in the UK, we can book an ambulance service to pickup and take home - the hospital has details.%0D\ %0D

  Lucy J.

• Hire a Girl Friday

• I am a surgeon that does alot of outpatient surgery(greater than 500 cases a year)and I own a surgery center. We are regulated by the government very closely. A patient may not go home alone without a responsible adult to be with them to care for them in the unlikely event that they are so incapacitated that they cannot call an ambulance. Remember they were under anesthesia. While that is very rare it can occur. Did you ever hear about medical liability? We do not make the rules for our good. It is for the good of the population. And to the writer that said that outpatient surgery is for the good of the provider, you need to clarify. It is for the good of the insurance company where they shift the cost of care to the family.

• I have had about 6 major dental surgeries in the past few years (Having a few implants put in) and the first couple of surgeries the dentist office said I must be picked up so I had a friend pick me up and I could tell this was not something they really wanted to do and it wasn''t really something I enjoyed asking them to do. So for the next one I just told the office, I''ll be taking a cab and they had me sign a release and scheduled a longer recovery time post op. They walked me out of the office, hailed a cab for me and sent me on my way.

• R44 is right, it''s a matter of liability.\ \ The person who hired a dog walker is smart. Find someone like that who you can pay to drive you to & fro, who doesn''t wear a uniform or drive a car with a logo, & who''s willing to let you tell a little white lie about the driver being your friend.

• I don''t have any friends or family where I live. I like the idea of hiring a medical transport service, but I bet they are very expensive.

• My first abortion was stressful too, OP.

• Mine was $45 dollars, R47. That was round trip and the guy picked me up at home, wheeled me into the surgery center, drove back there when I was in recovery and waited as they checked me out before wheeling me back to the van and driving me home. I had someone waiting there (since by then it was after work) so he didn''t have to wheel me in, but he would have, had I asked.\ \ The first time, I did the cab thing and it was $60 round trip and a lot of shit from a mean cab driver going, and an hour wait for another cab to return, despite numerous calls.

• R49, what kind of service did you use? Was it a service for the elderly?

• I feel shy about asking a friend to drive me to and from a colonoscopy because I don''t want to be farting all over her car.

• Thanks r46, that was me, and it did work out well. Besides being utterly reliable, she is a cute perky young woman who charms any staff who talk to her. Since she is about 20 years younger than me, they kept trying to guess that she was my daughter, and the last time actually let her into the recovery room to my amazement. She played along like a champ, swapping stories about how this compared to pet anesthesia when she worked at a vet''s. If anything went wrong on the way home, I am sure she would have simply driven me to an ER without blinking an eye. Compare this to dragging a reluctant acquaintance into it. Frankly, I think a taxi driver would be better that that, and I don''t know why they have this rule at all. Maybe in some gritty urban areas a taxi driver would dump you at roadside.

• [quote] Frankly, I think a taxi driver would be better that that, and I don''t know why they have this rule at all. Maybe in some gritty urban areas a taxi driver would dump you at roadside.\ \ The reasoning my Dr. gave was that in a still drugged state a cabbie could rob you or worse.

• I am on faculty at a nursing school. Many nursing programs maintain a ''baby sitter''s list'' of undergraduate nursing students who have some minimal healthcare training to sit for children or elderly parents. The going rate is about $10/hour.\ \ Call a nursing program in your town, and hire a college student to be your ''niece'' or ''nephew'' for the procedure. They will see that you get home safely. Plus, they can study (or play with facebook) while in the waiting room.

• R9- I have to have that surgery. Thanks for the tip. Otherwise I was planning on calling a cab. I''ll check out your recommendation.

  kcguy

• Basically the entire process discriminates against single people and people who may be new to an area or choose to keep their medical issues private.

• R50 -- I found my service by searching "Medical Transportation" and my zipcode. I called the guy and gave him my address and that of the surgery center, he googled the distance and quoted the price. Nothing about my age or anything like that. We scheduled the ride and, even though my procedure was delayed a few hours by an emergency (someone else''s) he called the surgery center a few times for updates and then returned when they called him -- no extra charge for me.

• I don''t have family where I live or neighbors who could get off from work. There is no taxi service in this area either.

• I am having my plump snauer sewn shut and I have to have someone pick me up because my snauer may bleed significantly. So I think I will have Cheryl pick me up.

• Is it true that Gayle Grinds middle name was Bethesda?

• In an emergency, I plan on calling DAtalounge 6-5000.%0D\ %0D\ Stand by, good friends (and drive carefully thru Devils Slide or on Hwy 92).%0D\ %0D\ Oh, and please take me to Kaiser Permanente in Redwood City.

  Cackle Cackle (no pain in my sawdust now but you never can tell)

• Hire Leo Giamani for the afternoon!

• The American Cancer Society''s "Road To Recovery" program provides free rides to & from chemo or radiation treatments. If a procedure is related to cancer -- including diagnostic procedures like colonoscopies -- they might be able to help, if the program is available in the area. Call at least a week ahead of time & find out. I expect that most of the volunteer drivers would be quite willing to let you say that they''re the patient''s friend.

  http://www.cancer.org/Treatment/SupportProgramsServices/Programs/road-to-recovery

• [R29] thanks for the idea... very helpful thread.

• I recently had minor surgery on my face (skin cancer) that didn't even call for a sleeping pill. Entirely day surgery. I tried to get away without having a friend(s) pick me up. When I checked in that morning, they asked who would be picking me up, to which I previously had told them (4 previous times) the name and phone number of the person picking me up. never a problem. Last time when they asked, I told them I had hired a service that specializes in taking/picking up cancer patients at the hospital; and they went blahooey! Totally refused to -- said it had to be someone who would walk me into my house safely and make sure I went to bed! AND that by state law (Texas) they weren't even allowed to BEGIN the surgery until I had given them a name and phone number because they need to "talk" the person themselves. Somehow I got one, and the surgery began. A rather nasty way to start the day ... all went well, the pain was minimal; and next day it was as if it had never even happened. Better have a backup plan, men!

  A%20Wiser%20Guy%20---%20AFTER%20The%20Fact%21

• This is a semi-frequent dilemma for me OP. I usually do the "door dash" method myself, because I am so immune to opiates that a little post op Perc isn't going to phase me. Plus, insurance isn't paying for many of the little procedures I have done. BUT, I recently had twilight anesthesia for a dental procedure, and the oral surgeon's office required a driver to show up with me and wait during the brief surgery. So I got one of those Granny Nanny services to take me. That doc must have had too many experienced with the "door dash" routine.

  anonymiss

• OP what medical procedure is it gonna be?

  Your Mother

• bump

• [quote]Hire Leo Giamani for the afternoon! He would be perfect for this endeavor. His detached behavior would match the after anesthesia doldrums.

• Isn't this the fear of every single, childless person? Not having anyone visit you in the hospital, drive you home, or care for you after major illness and surgery? That is why people have children. At least there will be someone there in your golden years.

• [quote]AND that by state law (Texas) they weren't even allowed to BEGIN the surgery until I had given them a name and phone number because they need to "talk" the person themselves Fucking "nanny state". Rick Perry hates our freedom.

• I was told it is illegal in California to entrust a person who has been under anesthesia to a stranger, e.g., a cab driver, as there have been too many cases where cab drivers mugged and then dumped off their sedated passengers. You don't think you're still under the effects of sedation an hour after your procedure but you are. And the older you are the worse it is. My friend in AZ was told the same thing prior to his colonoscopy...absolutely no cab drivers allowed.